POTC: The curse of the Black Angel
by Ranger24
Summary: Yeah third attepmt at a potc parody. We've got Dante as Jack Sparrow and a bunch of characters from code geass thrown in. Enjoy.
1. Prolouge: Skull and cross bones

**Ranger24: This is the one disney parody I've ever considered doing. And After Nukid's parody proved you could make this story friging hilarious I figured what the hell. This kinda my third attempt at this. Keep your fingers crossed folks.**

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Prolouge: Skull and cross bones

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Fog was heavy on the water and a chill breeze slowly swirled it about in strange paterns. Despite the mist however the Britannian warship _Pegasus_ made it's way through resolute. Right by the prow stood a young woman with hot pink hair, wearing white dress. Her violet eyes gazed out into the fog with some sign of disappointment.

Her name was Euphemia li Britannia, 3rd princess of the Holy Britannian empire. She was on her way with three of her other siblings to Port Britannia in the Caribbean where the oldest of the four, her older sister Cornelia li Britannia 2nd princess of Britannia, was to be the new governor. Slowly she began to sing to herself.

"Yo ho, yo ho, a pirates life for me... We pilage and plunder. We rifle and loot, Drink up me hearties yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho a pirates life for..."

Suddenly she gave a gasp of alarm as a strong arm grabbed her shoulder. Behind her stood a black guy with a mustache, a stern face, and wearing a green cap. Clutched in his teeth was an overly pungent smell. This was Sergeant Avery Jones Johnson.

"Quite down there little missy! Cursed pirates sail these waters. You don't want to bring them down on us do you?" Johnson hissed.

Unfortunatly for Johnson everyone on the deck saw what he was doing. A blonde haired young man with green eyes stepped forward wearing a white officer's uniform. This was Gino Weinberg.

"Sergeant Major that will do." Gino said coolly.

"Why I like it when Euphie sings?" Asked a female voice. Coming towards the bow were the other three members of the royal family that Euphie was traveling with. First was Cornelia dressed in red with a white cloak about her shoulders. Then there was Lelouch, eleventh prince of britannia. While Cornelia had purple hair Lelouch, who was her half brother, had black hair from his mother. Lelouch was pushing the wheel chair of his crippled and blind younger sister Nunnally who had a light tan hair color. Cornelia was sixteen, Lelouch was ten, Euphemia was nine, and Nunnally seven It was Nunnally who had spoken.

"Well she was singing about damned pirates, really bad luck to be talking about pirates out in these waters. She's probably already jinxed us." Johnson said gruffly taking his hand off Euphie's shoulder.

"Well if we are jinxed then so be it, as you were sergeant." Cornelia said in commanding tones. Gino turned to her looking exasperated. "I'm supposed to say that."

Cornelia glared daggers at the young Knight. "Do I look like the stereotype useless govenor to you? I'm as badass a leeader as they come."

"That and the Author doesn't like you very much Gino," Lelouch added.

"Why not?" Gino groaned.

"Because he finds you annoying, posh, and he hates that you hit on Kallen so much," Nunnally replied.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Gino asked.

"No idea." Lelouch said shrugging.

Johnson sighed. "Well if nobody minds I'm going to get back to knocking some sense into the new jarheads."

Johnson walked away from the bow still muttering under his breath. Gino walked up next to Euphemia hands clasped behind his back.

"Actually I think meeting a pirate would be really exciting," Euphemia said.

Gino smirked. "Think again there my Lady."

He stepped up beside her on the bow. "They're a violent bunch of thugs, drunks, robbers, and holigans. I'd personally see any man with a pirate brand or flying under a pirate flag gets his just desserts."

He glanced down at her. "A short drop, with a sudden stop."

Confused Euphemia glanced back at Johnson who promptly pull his neck tie up near his collar, tilted his head forward, and stuck out his tounge as though he were being throttled. Euphemia gave a slight gasp at the grizzly idea of what Johnson was suggesting with his motions.

Cornelia however stepped in. "Sir Weinberg I'd prefer if you didn't talk about such things in front of my siblings, they're a bit young for that sort of talk."

Gino nodded. "As you wish my lady."

"Actually I found that to be rather interesting," Lelouch commented.

"What'd he mean about a short drop and a sudden stop?" Nunnally asked.

"I'll tell you when you're older," Lelouch said quickly wheeling her away from the bow.

"I still wouldn't mind meeting a pirate," Euphemia said in cheery tones.

"Yes and that's what concerns me," Cornelia muttered following Lelouch and Nunnally.

Euphemia turned back to the sea watching the mist swiral above the water. Then she noticed a small umbrella floating in the water. She raised her eyebrows confused, what was an umbrella doing in the ocean? Then she saw something else; floating on the water clinging to a large chunk of wood was the drenched body of a boy not much older than she was!

"Look there's a boy in the water!" She shouted.

Everyone on deck rushed to the railing.

"Man over board!" Gino shouted.

Quickly a group of sailors piled into one of the ships life boats. It was lowered down and they rowed over the boy and pulled him aboard. Then they rowed back to the ship with all speed and were hoisted up. The boy had brown hair and was slightly tanned. Gino leaned down to his chest putting an ear over the boy's open mouth.

"He's still alive," Gino pronouced giving Euphemia a sense of relief.

"Mary, Joseph, go to church, read the bible Christ." Johnson suddenly said in a horrifed voice.

Everyone turned around to say the flaming wreckage of a ship. Not just one ship but at least three! Bodies were floating in the water amdist blasted peices of timber, floating light cannons, barrels, bits of rigging and sail, and burning fuel.

"What happened here?" Cornelia demanded.

"Most likely the powder magazines, merchant ships run heavily armed." Gino replied a grim expression on his face.

"And a lot of good it did for 'em," Johnson growled. "Everyone's thinking it but I'm just going to say it, Pirates."

"I"d have to agree with that assumption." Cornelia admitted.

"Again you mess up your lines," Gino said rolling his eyes.

"Well the chances of three merchant ships all suddenly exploding at once is pretty slim," Cornelia replied.

Gino sighed. "Okay then, well."

He straighted. "Raise the captian and run out the guns, full battle alert. Load up the marines and launch the boats! Get us ready to move with all speed."

Cornelia glanced at Euphemia as Lelouch quickly began moving Nunnally to the safety of the aft deck. "Euphie I want you to keep an eye on the survivor, he's under your care right now. I'm going to assist with coordinating the search, if there is a fight get below deck and hide."

"Okay," Euphemia relpied nodding. Cornelia ran off to assist with the lowering of the assault boats. Euphemia made her way back over the survivor and bent down next to him. She brushed and against his cheek and he suddenly coughed up a little water eyes opening wide and breathing heavily.

"It's okay your safe!" Euphemia said quickly. "My name is Euphemia, what's yours?"

"Suzaku Kuurugi," he said voice hoarse from possible salt water that had gone down his throat. Euphemia smiled.

"I'm looking after you Suzaku, don't worry."

But even as she said this he passed out again. As his head looled back a thin golden chain was revealed. Euphemia frowned and pulled it off him to reveal a small golden medallion with a glowing pink jewel at it's center. But around the jewel were a skull and cross bones. Euphemia's eyes widened.

"You're a pirate?" She whispered.

"Has he said anything?" Gino asked making Euphemia jump in suprise. She turned to face him hiding the medallion behind her back.

"His name is Suzaku Kuurugi, that's all I've found out." She answered in a firm tone.

Gino nodded satisfied. He glanced at two sailors near by. "Take him below."

The two Sailors saluted and grabbed Suzaku and carried him down into the ships inards. Euphemia slowly walked back over to the railing her mind racing. Had Suzaku been involved in the pirate attack and been left behind? Was he a pirate? She watched as the boats moved out into the wreckage with Cornelia at the head of the group.

She pulled the medallion out and looked at it closely. It seemed to have an erie, almost ominous aura about it. The skull and cross bones grinned back at her. The pink gem glowed eriely, almost sinisterly. Then out of the corner of her eye she caught the edge of large black sails. They were patched and full of holes. The fog seemed to emeniate form the ship. Then she saw the black flag, with the skull and cross bones grinning back at her.

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**Ranger24: And that's the chapter. Yes Cornelia did just basically give Gino a giant middle finger. Read and review!**


	2. Chapter 1: Seven years later

Chapter 1: Seven years later...

Discliamer: I own nothing.

Euphemia's eyes shot open and she sat up in bed shivering. She was in her dark bed room, her long pink hair falling down behind her. She was sixteen now; it had been seven years since the day she'd meet Suzaku, seven years since they'd arrived in Port Britannia, seven years since Lelouch and Suzaku had become best friends.

She climbed off her bed over to her nightstand and opened the lowest drawer. She hadn't gone in it for almost a year now. Inside were a few small odd ments from her child hood. A busted locket, a dried starfish, a few old sea shells. Then as she moved them all aside she found what she was looking for, the medallion covered in a thick layer of dust. She brushed the dust off and the skull and cross bones revealed it self again, as did the strange pink jewel. The Jewel was glowing with the same erie light as it had all of those years ago.

Slowly she set it around her neck allowing the golden chain to rest against her pale skin. She turned to face her mirror and adjusted the medallion.

Suddenly there came a hard knocking against her door. She spun around quickly tucking the medallion in between her cleavage.

"Euphie? Are you up yet?" Cornelia's voice called muffled by the door. Euphemia grabbed a small floral over shirt to go over her evening wear.

"Yes," Euphemia replied.

"Are you decent?" Cornelia asked.

"I'm fine," Euphemia replied sitting down on her bed making sure that the medallion was hidden. The chain managed to slip under neath the collar of her shirt.

The door opened and Cornelia came in fully dressed followed by the maid Sayako and one of the servant girls. Cornelia had grown up in the years since their crossing. Cornelia was twenty three years old. She now looked the part of both 2nd princess and royal govenor. Dressed in a dark red outfit with her large white cape with feather like appendages around the hem and neck. Cornelia sighed seeing Euphemia still in her Pj's.

"Still at bed when it's ten in the morning." Cornelia said shaking her head. At that moment the butler Alfred came in holding a large white box. Sayako and the servant opened the draps to Euphie's large windows and the morning sunshine flooded the bed room.

"What's in the box?" Euphemia asked curious.

Cornelia sighed. "Oh a little something from Sir Weinberg."

Euphemia opened it up to reveal a large dress which matched Cornelia's own decorum with a more passive pink and white. Euphemia looked it over with interest.

"Looks expensive, wonder what the occasion is?" Euphemia said lifting it up.

Cornelia shrugged and pulled out a small envelope. "We'll find out in a second, you going to try that on?"

Euphemia nodded and moved behind the changing screen thing (Hey I don't know what they're called so roll with it) as Sayako and the other servant set to work getting the dress on her. Cornelia opened up the envelope with a knife and began to read it.

"Oh well that's interesting." She said after leading a few lines while Euphemia pulled off her night clothes.

"What?" Euphemia asked from behind the screen.

"He sent it in the hopes that you'll wear it to the ceramony today," Cornelia said still reading the letter.

Euphemia stuck her head out from behind the screen. "Ceramony?"

"Gino's return from the homeland, he's been made a knight of the rounds." Cornelia replied.

Euphemia sighed. "I knew it."

They were now getting the dress on Euphemia and had just gotten the corset on. Of course they were tightening it to a pain full degree. Euphemia gave a slight yelp as they pulled the peice of clothing tight.

"You okay back there?" She asked.

"Difficult to say," Euphemia replied struggling to breath as the two servants began getting the actual dress on her.

"Says in the letter it's the big thing with Ladies in the homeland." Cornelia replied looking it over again.

"Well ladies in the homeland must have figured out how live without breathing." Euphemia said as the two servants began doing up the final peices of the dress.

At that moment Cornelia's royal Knight Guilford entered. He was tall with black hair and glasses. His stern expression and red uniform matched Cornelia's own powerfull presence well enough.

"Your highness, Mr. Kuurugi has arrived." He said calmly.

"About time." Cornelia muttered as Euphie finally stepped out from behind the screen, awkwardly walking.

Meanwhile in the Govenor's palace foyar Lelouch stood talking to Suzaku. Suzaku was seventeen now, he was dressed in the best clothes he had since he was visiting royalty. He wore an orange suit with a dark blue tie. His green eyes were bright and he was a little tanner now. Lelouch was the same as ever but was dressed in a black and purple shirt with black pants. Around his shoulders was a black cloak with purple embrodiary around the edges. At his waist was a katana in a black, gold embroided sheath and a gold filigery hilt.

When Suzaku had arrived in port Britannia he'd gotten a job as a blacksmith for the militar under a certian Earl Lylod Asplun. To say the least Asplun was good but he was very dismiss of humans.

"So I told him last night, if your not going to put the finisher on the sword then fine! I will!" Suzaku said as he raised a long thin black box. Lelouch smiled. "And what he say?"

"Nothing, he just grabbed a bottle of rum and started work on other projects before he passed out from drinking to much." Suzaku replied.

Lelouch laughed. "Same old earl Asplund I guess."

"Tell me about." Suzaku muttered running a hand over a candel braket on the wall.

Unfortunatly, the branch of the braket he was touching snapped off and fell into his hands. Suzaku's eyes widened in alarm.

"Oh shit." Lelouch said equally alarmed.

Suzaku tried putting it back but it had come clean off.

"What do I do?" He asked panicking.

"Hide it in the umberella stand!" Lelouch said as there came the sound of foot steps from north wing.

Suzaku shoved the peice of metal into the umberella stand and turned about just in time as a tall man with aqua hair and orange eyes entered pushing Nunnally who was in a much nicer looking wheel chair and dressed in a pale pink and tan dress that matched her hair. The man pushing the wheel chair was Lelouch's body guard Margrave Jeremaih Gottwald. If there were two things Jeremaih was known for, his loyalty, to the point of treating said loyalty like it was a fine woman, to the royal family and his known dislike for Suzaku. He would take any chance he could get to take a jab at Suzaku.

"Good morning Nunnally," Suzaku said keeping his tones even as not to attract Jeremaih's suspicion.

Nunnally turned to the source of his voice, she was still blind. "Good morning Suzaku, what are you doing here?"

"Making a delivery," Suzaku replied.

"Didn't that candle braket have five branches?" Jeremaih said frowning.

"No I'm pretty sure it only has four branches," Lelouch said smiling.

Jeremaih seemed about to say something when Cornelia came down the stairs, Guliford close behind.

"Kuurugi, it's good to see you again." She said when she reached foyar. Suzaku did a bow of respect to the 2nd princess.

"Good day to you Govenor." He brought forth the black case. "I've got your order."

Cornelia nodded and he opened up the case to reveal a long rapier with a golden cross guard and pommel, a hand guard of golden wire formed a net from the hilt to the pommel closer in spection showed that the three peices of gold were all one peice of gold. The sheath was jet black with gold studs along it and a golden cap around the tip.

Cornelia smiled taking the sword from it's case, she slid it out of the sheath soundlessly.

"It's all 24 kart gold my lady, finest wood avaible used on the sheath." Suzaku said as she raised the rapier up to eye level. "The blade is fold steel, folded two hundred times for added strenght."

Suzaku offered out his hand. "If I may your highness?"

Cornelia proffered the hilt of the sword to Suzaku who raised it himself to eye level. "Perfectly balance, the tang is almost the full lenght of the blade."

"You haven't put that much work into a sword since you made Minamoto for me," Lelouch observed.

"Hey a birthday present for a friend, and royalty, deserves a lot of work." Suzaku repled smiling as he flipped the rapier end over end, caught the blade in his right hand offering the hilt to Cornelia who seemed pleasently suprised by Suzaku's action.

"Some times I wonder why you didn't enlist," she said sliding the sword back into it's sheath. "Sir Weinberg will be pleased."

She looked back at Suzaku as Guilford took the rapier and set it in it's case. "Give my regards to earl Asplund."

Suzaku's smile flickered breifly. "I shall, a craftsmen always likes his work being praised."

The truth was that all of the decoration and more than half the folding of the steel had been Suzaku's work.

At that moment however Euphemia came down the stairs her hair done up in a long pony tail, dressed in the dress sent to her by Gino. She smiled as she saw Suzuka who's smile became genuine.

"Suzaku," she said cheerily.

"Princess Euphemia," Suzaku said bowing.

"I had a dream about you last night, about the day we meet. Do you remember?" She said in reminsing tones.

Jeremaih and Guilford both had uncomfortable expressions on their faces.

"How could I forget Princess Euphemia." Suzaku replied.

Euphemia barely supresed a giggle. "How many times do I have to tell you to just call me Euphie?"

"At least once more, Princess." Suzaku answered.

"Well we need to get going, these sort of things always take a while so we might as well not keep everyone waiting." Cornelia making for the front doors followed by Guilford, Euphie, Lelouch, Nunnally, and Jeremaih. She gave a respectfull nod to Suzaku. "Good day to you Mr. Kuurugi."

"See you Suzaku," Leloluch said.

"Good bye Suzaku," Nunnally said as Jeremaih wheeled her out.

Euphemia gave him a smile before heading out the door to the carriage waiting for them. "Good day Suzaku."

Suzaku could only stand and watch as the carriage pulled away from the Govenor's palace. "Good day," he said sadly. "Euphie."

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**Ranger24: Okay and next chapter we meet our dashing badass captain. Read and review!**


	3. Chapter 2: Captian Dante Sparda

**Ranger24: Please note I only put myself in for comic relief.**

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Chapter 2: Dante Sparda

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Out on the harbor however a ship began approaching the port. On the top of the mast stood a man in the prime of his youth. Sliver hair hanging around his head like a mop, ice blue eyes sparkling in the sun light. He wore a large red trench coat with black pants. Resting over his right shoulder on his back was a large sword with a skeleton design hilt and a spiked pommel. Across his bare chest was a brown leather strap that came out the back of his coat to hold the holsters for two pistols one white and the other black.

He was bold, he was deadly, he was half drunk, half crazy, all badass Dante Son of Sparda! With his trusty sword Rebellion he was known throughout the sea's as a total womanizing badass and...

"Hey Dante! You mind lending a hand down here?" Someone from below him shouted. Well not much below him. About ten feet below him actually.

Standing there in the water logged little dingy was Ranger24 Dante's student. Ranger had dark brown hair, brown eyes, and was a little bit taller than Dante. He was dressed in a green coat underneath a black leather vest with a sword that was considerably shorter and thiner than rebellion slung over his back. Two pistols of his own where holstered the same way Dante's were. Only difference was one of Ranger's was silver grey and the other was gold.

Dante sighed and jumped down into the pool of water that had leaked into their dingy. Ranger was already at work with a bucket trying to save the ship. Dante picked up a second bucket and began dumping even more of the flood over the side. Yes they were in a litte ship barely worthy of being called a boat with a small sail and a hull with more leaks in it than anyone could count. Yeah, they looked like idoit's trying to save the dingy from a watery grave.

Suddenly they both paused in their work glancing up to see three human corpses hanging from under a rock outcropping. Against ones chest was hung a wooden sign.

'Pirate's Ye be warned,' it read.

Dante and Ranger bowed their heads in respect.

"Sad mess they make of our lot," Ranger said with a somber tone to his voice.

"Yeah, tell me about it." Dante muttered glancing down at the water level. It was up over his shoes and Ranger's boots.

"Aw shit," Ranger growled grabbing up his bucket. Dante stopped him however.

"No point, we're entering the shallows now." Dante said climbing back onto the mast. Ranger sighed and climbed up after him as they entered the port.

"So what have we got to pick from?" Dante asked as the ships in the harbor came into view. First was a massive Battleship with huge sails and dozens of cannons. Unfortunatly it was simply to large for the two of them could hope to "borrow". Then there were dozen of small row boats, fishing ships, and one large merchant vessel that was unloading cargo. Most of the smaller ships had no weapons while the merchant vessel was to large, to slow, and to lightly armed. Then his eyes fell upon a third ship. It was mid sized, slim, well armed, and had more sail and rigging than all of the other ships except the large battleship.

Dante smirked. "Jack pot."

"Umm... boss?" Ranger shouted pointing down at the boat which was now sinking.

"Yeah I know, just hold onto the mast and kickass." Dante said.

Everyone in the harbor began to pause at what they were doing to stare at the two of them as they rode the remains of their boat all the way up to the peir. Then they both stepped off at the exact same time.

The moment they hit the peir a man wearing a fine coat walked towards them followed by a small boy holding a book and pen. Dante and Ranger simply ignored the two and walked right past them. The man startled turned to them.

"Hey wait a second you two!" He shouted bringing the two of them to a halt. They turned about with bemused expressions.

"It's a shilling to tie a boat up at the docks," the man said pointing at the remains of their boat. The assitant handed him the record book which he opened. "And I will need to know your names."

Dante put on a face of mock consideration reaching intoo one of his coat pockets.

"How about three shillings," Dante said pulling the coins out of his pocket and placing them on the pages. "And we forget the names?"

The man considered it for about half a second before snapping the book shut. "Welcome to port Britannia Mr. Griffin and Mr. Pewterschmit."

"Two names that really don't go together," Ranger muttered as Dante gave the man a little bow of respect. The dock master hardly noticed a knife flash from Ranger's left hand and cutting into his purse. They walked to other end of the peir and Dante noticed a small wallet. He casually scoped it up and gave it a little shake. It gave a cheery clink of metal. As soon as they were away from the dock Ranger opened his left hand to reveal five shillings.

"That was satisifying," he commented.

"A refund with interest," Dante said grinning as they made their way along the board walk.

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Meanwhile up at the near by Britannia military base, fort Agincourt, several lines of britannia troops marched through the entrance to the fort square rifles at their shoulders. Anybody who was anyone stood watching, men in ruffeled coats and women in large dresses. As the troops marched the military band played a marching tune that the stomp of the soldiers boots matched in rythm perfectly.

Euphemia sat near Cornelia at the far end of the procession. She was fanning herself heavily with a small fan do to not only the tropical heat but the shear weight of the dress and how much extra air she need just to breath easily. She honestly wish this whole thing was over with so she could get out of the blasted dress.

At that moment the prosecion came to a halt and parted like the red sea to from an asile.

"Present arms!" Guliford shouted and the soldier's lowered their rifles to for an arch way.

At the opposite end of the arch of rifles and bayonets Gino stepped forward dressed in the finery of a knight of the rounds. A green cape with a high collar was draped around him and his white uniform was embrodied with golden lace work. He'd certianly grown into his position of knight of the rounds rather quickly. With a confident stirde he made his way down the asile to where Cornelia stood.

Guilford passed Cornelia the box with the rapier Suzaku had made as Gino bowed down in respect. Guliford opened the box and Cornelia took out the Rapier. She then handed it hilt first to Gino who accepted it and rose to his feet. He drew the rapier out of the scabard and, like Suzaku and Cornelia had done, began to examine his new weapon with great scrutiny.

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Back down at the docks Dante and Ranger came up to the docks where the smaller of the two warships. They stepped down onto the peir that lead to the gang way but just as they neared the blank bridge to the ship two soldier's, one in Orange and the other in Marroon armor stepped forward to block them. These two fine gentlemen are Grif and Simmons respectivly.

"This dock is off limits to civilains," Simmons proclaimed in as firm a tone as he could muster.

Dante nodded apologectically. "Terribly sorry, we didn't know."

"If we see one we'll let you know." Ranger added trying to step onto the gangway but Simmons and Grif held firm.

Dante changed tac quickly. "Apperantly there's some sort of well to do up at the fort. Now how is it that two fine gentlemen as yourselves, didn't marite and invitation?"

Grif glanced at Simmons who shared his slightly uncomfortable look.

"Someone needs to make sure that this dock remains off limits to civilians." Grif replied.

Dante nodded appreciatively. "And that is a fine goal gents. But it seems to me," he stepped towards the larger ship on the harbor and Grif and Simmons moved to block him. Ranger however crept slowly onto the gangway.

"It seems to me, that with a ship like that around it makes this boat seem a little super frivolus." Dante continued.

Simmons nodded. "Yeah the _Pegasus _is a power in these waters, but there is no ship in these sea's that can match the _Avalon _here," he jerked his thumb back at the ship Ranger was now silently getting ready to get under way. "For speed."

Dante frowned. "I've heard of one; it's supposed to be very fast, no, uncatchable."

Dante's frown turned into a smirk. "The _Black Angel_."

At this remark Simmons burst out laughing. "Oh come on! There is no real ship that can keep pace with the Avalon. The _Black Angel_ is a myth."

_"Black Angel_ is a real ship Simmons." Grif suddenly said. Simmons looked at him sceptically.

"You've seen it?" Simmons said incerdulous.

"Yeah I have." Grif replied. Dante raised an eyebrow.

"You've seen a ship with black sails, that's crewed by the damned, and captianed by a man so fucking evil that hell itself spat him back out and went to several months of painfull and embaressing therapy?"

Grif frowned. "No."

"And there you go," Simmons replied

"But I have seen a ship with black sails," Grif noted.

Simmons rolled his eyes. "Oh so what you're seeing that just because you've seen a ship with black sails but it wasn't crewed by the damned, and captianed by a man so fucking evil that hell itself spat him back out and went to several months of painfull and embaressing therapy. That it couldn't possibly be any other ship but the _Black Angel_! Is that what you're saying?"

Grif paused for a moment. "Umm... No?"

Simmons nodded. "See there is no ship that can match the..."

Then they both realized that Dante and Ranger were on the deck of the _Avalon _making ready to sail, Dante at the helm. Alarmed Grif and Simmons ran onto the ship rifles raised.

"HEY! HAND'S OFF OUR SHIP YOU BASTARDS!" Grif shouted training his rifle on Dante who raised his hands in warning while Simmons forced Ranger towards the helm.

"We're sorry it's just such a pretty boat." Dante said apologectically.

"Ship," Ranger corrected.

"Whatever," Dante said rolling his eyes.

"What are your names?" Grif asked frowning.

Dante gave a mock look of distress. "Oh my apologieze, my name is Mr. Griffen and that's Mr. Pewterschmit."

"Yeah we're from Mourges 'R' us. We're to set up shop here in case of plauge, war, or random pirate raid." Ranger added.

"That's what the last couple of guys who tried to steal this ship said!" Simmons shouted.

"What's your real bussiness here? Mr. Griffen and Mr. PewterSchmit," Grif asked not hiding his sarcasm.

"Yeah and no lies!" Simmons added.

Dante frowned. "No lies?"

He noticed Ranger's hands straying to the grips of his pistols. He gave his student a sharp look and Ranger lowered his hands. Dante sighed stepping forward well aware of the rifles trained on him.

"Alright gents, I confess. It is my intention with this young man who is my apprentice to commonder one of the ships in this harbor, pick up a crew in Horai, and then pillage, plunder, and pirate our weaslelly black guts out." Dante said smiling as he finished.

Simmons and Grif looked throughly confused by this last statement.

"I said no lies!" Simmons said pathetically.

"I think he's telling the truth." Grif muttered.

"If he were telling the truth he wouldn't have told us that you dumbass!" Simmons shouted in frustration.

"Unless he knew that you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told you the truth," Ranger suggested.

This got a breif nod of comprehension from the two morons before they both became throughly confused with Ranger's statement.

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Back up at fort Agincourt the ceramony had shifted over to a party for the rich, the military officers, the nobles, and the members of the royal family. Of course it was hardly a peacefull event Lelouch was running for his life, and balls, from a massive crowd of his fanclub members most of them girls ranging from twelve to nineteen. Euphemia couldn't help but find the scene comical as she described it to Nunnally while Jeremaih tried in vain to slow down the horde of crazed fangirls.

Ever since Lelouch had turned atleast fourteen fans of his had started showing up. He actually had Jeremaih search his mail with a pitch fork on his birthday just to make sure there weren't any crazy women hiding in the packages. On his sixteenth birthday he had been showered with nudy pics of girls with their address's on the back of the pictures. He'd promptly had Jeremaih get rid of them all. He'd gotten twice as many pics on his more recent seventeenth birthday. The ladies couldn't resist his bishonen good looks, not to mention the fact he was royalty which meant three things, wealth, power, and status.

At that moment however Gino walked over to her. "May I have a word with you in private Princess?"

Euphemia nodded as Lelouch ran into the cover of a mens restroom for shelter from the hordes of his fans who gave moans of disappointment.

Gino lead her up onto a balconey that over looked the harbor. Not to far below them was the Avalon were two figures were talking to the guards.

"You know with this promotion a couple of things have been revealed to me Princess." Gino said.

Euphemia however was having trouble paying attention. She realized she'd left her fan with Nunnally. She was struggling to breathe which Gino didn't seem to notice.

"For one thing with this new status it normally requires a little bit of long term companionship in the form of a member of the opposite gender." Gino continued. "And for a knight of the rounds that means a woman of distinction and beauty; and you, my lady, have truly become beautiful."

"I . . . can't . . . breathe." Euphemia said gasping for breath. Her lungs weren't getting enough manuvering room.

"Yeah I'm feeling a bit light headed myself," Gino replied not realizing she was being literal. He hardly noticed when she passed out and feel over the side of the balconey. When he did turn around however he noticed she was missing a look of confusion crossed his face. "Princess Euphemia?" Then he looked over the parapet and saw to his horror that she was falling down into the harbor!

"Princess Euphemia!" He shouted in alarm stripping off his cape as she hit the water. His cry alert Cornelia, Guilford, and several officers of Britannia one being Kewel Sinso who was Gino's subordinate. Kewel grabbed him by the shoulders as Lelouch came out of a secret passage near the balconey away from his fans who had disperessed.

"The rocks my lord! It's a miracle she missed them!" Kewel shouted.

"Everyone to the harbor now! Get rescue swimmers ready at once!" Cornelia shouted leading the rush out of the fort. Gino's face fell. "That's my job."

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile below Dante and Ranger stood on the peir to the _Avalon_ with Grif and Simmons.

"And then they made me their cheif." Dante finished recounting another of his thrilling adventures.

"Wow, I can't believe you beat the shit out of that many communists." Grif commented.

Dante was about to reply when suddenly they saw a woman fall down from the fort! They watched in alarm as she hit the water, narrowly missing several sharp rocks at the bottom of the cliff. Dante looked promptly at Simmons and Grif.

"Aren't you two going to save her?" He asked.

"I can't swim," Simmons admitted.

"Ditto, to much work man," Grif dead panned.

At that moment a small pink blob jumped up out of the water on to the peir. Before it could do anything however Ranger whiped out one of his pistols and shot it.

He glared at Grif. "Don't say that word."

Dante rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Real tributes to the Emperors navy you two are." He muttered pulling of Rebellion a tossing it into Grif's hands. Girf stumbled under the weight of the sword and then fell over as Dante stripped off his coat and threw it on him.

"Do not lose those," Dante warned before diving into the water head first.

"Hey why aren't you holding all of this crap?" Grif asked Ranger, struggling to stand up with the weight of Rebellion in his arms.

"Because I'm the author dumbass." Ranger replied breaking the fourth wall.

As Euphemia floated down into the water the Medallion slipped out from inbetween her jugs. It rose slowly above her as she hit the bottom of the harbor. The pink jewel flashed and pulse eminated from it.

Above on the peir the _Avalon_ swayed dangerously and the dock shock. Grif fell over again with a yelp of pain and Simmons steadied himself against a barrel.

"What the hell was that?!" Simmons shouted.

Ranger's eyes widened as he felt the strange aura emenating from the water.

"What the devil?" He muttered.

Then the wind began to pick up strangely. Grif got slapped in the face by Dante's coat sleeves.

Back in the water Dante swam down with powerfull strokes and grabbed the woman around the waist. He then began to swim up wards but just as he cleared the surface of the water he was yanked back under. The large dress the girl was wearing made her as heavy as a rhino! He ripped at the fabric but it was to thickly woven and the fibers had swollen in the water.

His eyes then flashed red and strange aura surrounded him for the breifest second before he ripped the dress clean in half. Then he pushed with all of his might up to the surface and then clambered onto the peir pulling the woman out behind him up onto the wooden planks. He was gasping for breath and panting heavily while Grif nealt down next to the woman.

"She isn't breathing!" He said in a panicky voice.

"Quick do your life saving CPR Grif!" Simmons shouted. Dante muttered a curse and pulled a switch blade out of his pants pocket.

"Move!" He snapped slashing at the corset. The straps broke apart and he yanked it off handing it to Grif who seemed suprised to be holding not only a giant sword, a big red coat, but also a womans corset. Dante pushed on her chest and almost instantly she coughed up a lot off water eyes fluttering open spluttering.

"You know I never would have thought of that." Simmons admitted.

"Clearly you've never been to Rouge town." Ranger muttered.

Then Dante noticed the medallion around her neck, and the pink gem at it's center. Helifted it up in his hands frowning. "Where the hell did you get that?" Dante whispered.

Before she could answer however Dante felt cold steel against his neck.

"On your feet." Gino hissed.

The peir was now full of Britannian soldiers along with Lelouch and Cornelia making there way to the front of the group. Ranger was already at gun point by Kewel and his men. Dante slowly rose to his feet and keeping his arm lowered. He dropped the switch blade on the wooden planks. Cornelia quickly pulled her younger sister to her feet and then turned to the two strangers glaring.

"Kill them," she growled.

"Sister!" Euphemia shouted suddenly stepping in front of Dante and Ranger. "Are you really going to excute my rescuers?"

Cornelia considered it for a moment and Gino sheathed his sword and raised his hand. The soldier's lowered their rifles. Gino frowned at Dante.

"I believe thanks are in order." He said coolly.

Dante accepted the hand shake but then Gino grabbed his arm with his other hand and turned Dante's arm to reveal a large black P burned into his skin.

"Had a brush with the Cylon trading congolmerate did we Pirates?" Gino said a certian vermence in his voice. Everyone of the soldiers raised their rifles again and Ranger muttered a curse.

"Scratch shooting him, hang him." Cornelia ordered.

Then Gino noticed another tatto on Dante's fore arm. This one had showed a demonic knight in red ink. Gino smirked.

"Well, well, well, look's like we've caught the famous half devil pirate Dante Sparda."

"Captian Dante Sparda," Dante interjected.

"I don't see your ship anywhere, Captian." Gino countered.

"We're in the market," Ranger admitted.

"See I told you he was telling the truth, suck it Simmons!" Grif proclaimed.

"Oh fuck off Grif." Simmons growled.

"These are his sir." Grif said passing over Dante's gear.

Gino eyed it all critically pulling out Ebony and Ivory. He ejected the magazines to discover both guns had only one round in them. He quickly checked Dante's coat.

"No additional magazines or bullets." He observed.

He pulled out a small black compase from Dante's coat to find that it spun around uncontrably.

"A compase that doesn't point north," Gino observed before pulling up Rebellion. When he tried to lift it however it fell into the wooden peir and went through half way. Everyone stood staring at the sword until Dante yanked it out and handed it back to Gino.

"How the hell can you use a sword that heavy?" Lelouch asked.

"Half-devil," Dante replied simply.

Gino gave a deicive snort. "Okay fine then survive," He pulled out a pistol and pointed it at Dante's head. "This."

Everyone gasped as Gino shot Dante in the head! Euphemia gave a scream.

Suddenly Dante shot right back up and kicked Gino in the Weinberg family jewels. He stood there a small trail of blood dripping from his forehead. "WHAT THE HELL MAN!! WHY THE FUCK DID YOU SHOOT ME!!"

"Keep your guns on the men, Kewel get some hand cuffs." Gino whispered holding himself. "Some one take the other assholes weapons."

Dante muttered a curse a Kewel began putting the manacles around his hands and another soldier began to disarm Ranger. Euphie suddenly stepped forward angerily.

"Sir Weinberg I must protest! That man just saved my life!"

"One good deed does not erase a life time of wickedness." Gino replied.

"Seems enough to condem him though." Dante noted.

"Indeed," Gino growled as Kewel finished fitting Dante with had cuffs.

"Finally," Dante muttered.

Suddenly he leapt forward and wrapped his chains around Euphemia's neck! Everyone raised their rifles!

"No don't shoot!" Cornelia shouted!

"That's right! I've got the princess around the neck with some chains!" Dante said slowly backing up as Ranger kicked away his guards and recovered his weapons. He pulled up his pistols pointing one at Cornelia and one at Gino!

"Okay now everyone let's take this slow, I'll give you back the little lady and you give me back my stuff. Also someone kicks blondie in the shins." Dante said.

"Wait what was that last part?" Gino asked before Cornelia and Lelouch both kicked him in the shins.

"Good now hurry up and give me my stuff to the girl," Dante said tightening the chains. Cornelia glared at him but handed the weapons and coat over Euphie.

"Now what's your name girly?" Dante asked.

"My name is Euphemia, you creep!" Euphemia hissed.

"Well my lady if you'd be so kind?" Dante suggested in teasing tones.

Euphemia glared at him but began to put his coat weapons back on him. She merely hung the coat over his shoulder and buttoned it up at the collar although not genetly.

"Easy on the goods babe." Dante said coughing slightly.

Euphemia kicked him in the shin. "Jackass."

"Hey! Sticks and stones lady, I saved your life you're saving ours we're square." Dante replied before turning her around to face everyone else.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," Dante began in mocking tones. "This is the day you will alway remember that you almost caught, Captian Dante SPARDA!" Then he shoved Euphemia at them and kicked the whinch on a crane that was being used to load extra guns onto the _Avalon_.

Ranger and Dante grabbed onto the rope and went flying up screaming as the cannon dropped down and smashed through the peir! They swung around in a circle screaming.

"SHOOT 'EM GOD DAMNIT!" Gino shouted and the soldiers all opened fire but missed horribly!

The two pirates went flying from the rope and landed farther down the docks! They landed and kept running screaming at the top of their lungs as bullets came whizzing at them.

Gino sighed turning to Kewel. "Kewel remind me to ask the Emperor to invest in more accurate rifles okay?"

* * *

**Ranger24: Oh god I never thought I'd finish that chapter! Okay next time Suzaku and Dante fight! Read and review!**


	4. Chapter 3: Dante vs Suzaku

**Ranger24: Okay back to business, enjoy the chapter loyal readers.**

* * *

Chapter 3: Dante vs Suzaku

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The town was literally being turned over by the Britannian military as they searched for Dante and Ranger. Unbeknowst to them the two pirates had split off to confuse their perusers. As a small column of troops rushed past a blacksmith they hardly noticed that the sword the black smith statue in front was working on was a bit to large. Once they had gone Dante queitly slipped out from behind the statue and into the workshop which had the name 'Asplund' over the front door.

Inside Dante found the shop had a high ceiling, a messy floor and lots of heavy machinery expected of a black smith shop. The only thing that moved was a sleeping donkey in the corner. Dante smirked, to easy.

Suddenly there came an exceptionally loud snore. Dante whirled about to face the source drawing Ebony & Ivory. All he saw however was a sliver haired man in a white coat with an large amount of empty rum bottles lying around him. He was snoring loudly. Dante cautiously approached him and pocking him with the barrel of Ivory. The man just snored even louder. Dante smirked and turn around. Then he whirled about again both pistols pointed right at the mans face. The man's empty bottle dropped to the floor with a thunk.

Dante sighed and set to work trying to get his hand cuffs off. He first gave it a go with a hammer and anvil but that just bent the manacle and shortened the length of the chains. Frowning Dante glanced at the donkey.

Half a second later the Donkey gave a yelp of pain as Dante jabbed it in the ass with a hot poker. He swung his chains into the large gears of the wheel the Donkey was turning. Dante hung there by his hands for a second until the chains snapped. Dante grinned and slipped his coat on properly even though the manacles were still on.

He was about to leave when the door began to creak open. . .

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Meanwhile Ranger ran for his life down the streets of the town panting heavily. Dante may have been able to out smart his hunters but Ranger had a certian orange eyed nut job on his tail with a large blade sticking out of his right sleeve.

"For the honor of the Royal family I shall defeat you!" Jeremaih shouted.

Ranger rounded a bend and swore, it was a dead end.

Ranger turned about to face Jeremaih and drew his sword.

"Okay buddy you want to go then bring it!" Ranger shouted slamming his sword down against the paving stones shattering several of them.

Jeremaih smirked. "Tough talk from a pirate punk like your self kid. You've got spunk but I still have to arrest or kill you."

"Oh shut up orange boy," Ranger snapped charging forward.

They clashed blades and two held eachother in place for a few seconds. Ranger gritted his teeth in frustration. Jeremaih hardly seemed to mind the strain.

"You fight well for a youngster but your skill is no match to my loyalty!" Jeremaih proclaimed.

"Oh would you shut up about your fucking loyalty!" Ranger snarled.

Then they broke off their clash and Ranger made a vicous stabb at Jeremaih with both hands on his sword. Jeremaih stumbled back when he blocked the blow but Ranger went a bit to far forward. Jeremaih slammed his knee cap into Ranger's stomach and Ranger gave a gasp of pain as the wind was knocked out of him. His elbow however flew up and smashed Jeremaih in the nose.

Jeremaih gave a yelp of pain as blood began dripping down from his nostrils. Ranger however fell over on the ground out cold as Britannian soldier's came around the corner and trained their rifles on the downed warrior.

Ranger looked up and groaned. "Oh fuck me."

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Suzaku opened the door to the workshop and saw to his confusion that the Donkey was running in circles around it's route. Rushing forward he rubbed the poor beasts neck calming it down. He sighed and turned to face Lylod Asplund who was still in a drunken sleep. Suzaku smiled thinly pulling of his orange jacket. "Right where I left you."

He turned to the small anvil in the corner and saw to his further confusion a small hammer sitting on the anvil.

"Not where I left you," he muttered.

He walked over to anvil and reached out to the hammer to pick it up.

Suddenly a large sword blade slapped his hand. Suzaku took a step back eyes widening as Dante stepped out of the shadows Rebellion pointed at Suzaku. Suzaku glared at the half devil.

"You're the one their hunting aren't you? The pirate!" Suzaku snarled.

Dante frowned. "You look fimalair, have I threatened you before?"

"I prefer to not associate with pirates," Suzaku hissed.

Dante smiled. "Well kid I wouldn't want to put a black mark on your record so..."

Suddenly Suzaku snatched a sword that was hanging from a rack. Dante frowned again and the two began to circle.

"You think this is wise boy? Crossing swords with a pirate?" Dante asked cooly.

"You threatened Princess Euphemia," Suzaku replied coldly a fire burning in his eyes.

Dante smirked. "Maybe just a little."

Then Suzaku swung at Dante and Dante blocked with ease! Then Dante countered but Suzaku deftly deflected the stroke and swung back at Dante who blocked again. Dante raised an eyebrow before swinging Rebellion at Suzaku overhead only to to have the young man side step his blow and swing at Dante's side.

Dante smirked. "Okay kid, you know what you're doing I'll give you that. Good form excellent reaction time."

He raised an eyebrow. "But how is your foot work?"

They began to circle again.

"If I step over here!" Dante said making a feirce stab at Suzaku who jumped back and slashed at Dante who blocked the attack. He sturck back but Suzaku was able to stop his strike. Dante grinned.

"Okay nice work." Dante commented. "Now I step again!"

He swung his sword under hand but Suzaku spun to his left and slashed at Dante again who deftly blocked it and then smirked.

"Thank you for the fun kid," Dante said.

Suzaku suddenly realized that Dante now had his back to the door. Dante put Rebellion on his back and made his way over to the door. Desprate Suzaku threw his sword into the doors locking mechanism were it stuck quivering inches from Dante's face. Dante frowned and gave the sword a tug but it held firm.

"Shit," Dante muttered turning back to Suzaku.

"Nice trick kid, but now." Dante said pulling Rebellion off his back. "You have no weapon."

Suzaku turned about a pulled a half finished, still hot sword out of the furnace and pointed its red hot tip at Dante. The Donkey gave a squell of fright as Suzaku made a slash at Dante who blocked as fast as he could sparks flying all over the place. Their sword's flashed and rang as they battled. Dante was forced back towards the large track a frustrated look on his face.

With a mighty slash of Rebellion he snapped Suzaku's sword in half. Suzaku however swung around the axis of the Donkey's track and came out with a fresh sword! He swung at Dante who blocked and glanced around the shop realizing there were swords and weapons everywhere!

"Who the fuck makes all of these?" He asked incredulous.

Suzaku spun around the Axis again and Dante blocked his blow.

"I do!" Suzaku said before spinning around the axis to attack Dante again. "And I practice with them!" He spun again and Dante blocked again. "Three hours a day!" He spun again and Dante once more blocked his blow.

"You need to find yourself a girl man," Dante commented as Suzaku spun around again. Once more Rebellion blocked Suzaku's attack. Dante smirked.

"Or it's that you've found a girl but are incapable of winning fair ladies heart," then he frowned looking Suzaku up and down. "You're not gay are you?"

Suzaku grabbed a second sword and tried to stab Dante but the Half-devil Pirate dodged the blow.

"I pracitce three hours a day so that when I meet a pirate, I CAN KICK HIS ASS!!!" Suzaku shouted before Dante shoved him back towards the center of the shop with Rebellion. They clashed swords again and Dante backed up onto a wagon.

Suddenly Suzaku shoved his sword into the chains of Dante's manacles and stuck the half devil to the rafters by his left hand. Struggling Dante swung furiously at Suzaku who stepped onto the wagon. Then the chain holding Dante up snapped and he fell down onto the wagon and Suzaku was thrown up into the rafters.

Dante smirked looking up only to see Suzaku cut the rope of a hanging anvil.

"Oh shit," Dante muttered before the anvil hit the wagon and threw him into rafters. He pulled himself up and the two began fighting feircly with the swords again. Sweat dripped down their foreheads from the ferocity of their blows until Dante shoved Suzaku off with Rebellion and Suzaku crashed to the floor. Dante jumped down after him and Suzaku snatched up a mallet ready to continue the fight!

He was confronted however by Ebony & Ivory's barrels. Dante smirked at him and the two stood their panting heavily.

"You cheated," Suzaku finally said inbetween gasps for breath.

"Pirate," Dante replied simply.

Suddenly the door began shaking and there came the sound of male voices.

"Oh shit," Dante muttered.

There was another door at the back of the shop but Suzaku stepped in front of it mallet raised. Dante's eyes narrowed.

"Move."

"No," Suzaku said shaking his head.

"Please move?" Dante asked sounding slightly desperate.

"NO! I cannot let you escape not after you threatened Princess Euphemia!" Suzaku shouted!

Dante swore flicking Ebony & Ivory's safties off. "These shots aren't meant for you kid!"

Suzaku closed his eyes bracing himself for the pain. Instead of the bang of Dante's pistols there came the sound of shattering glass. Suzaku opened his eyes just in time to see Dante fall forward with Lylod standing behind him holding a broken bottle of rum.

At that moment the door burst open and in rushed Gino, Kewel, and entire platoon of Britannian troops. All of them surrounded Dante's prone form and took aim at him. Gino smirked confidently.

"Excellent work Earl Asplund, you've aided in the capture of a dangerous felon." Gino said coolly.

"What? I did all the work!" Suzaku shouted anime jaw dropping.

"Anyways folks, this will be the day that Captian Dante Sparda almost escaped." Gino said before laughing.

"Lame." Lylod said simply.

"Oh shut up you." Gino muttered.

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**Ranger24: Okay thats the chapter for today. Next time we welcome the crew of the Black Angel! Read and review.**


	5. Chapter 4: The Black Angel pwns

**Ranger24: Okay party time enjoy the violent chapter!**

* * *

Chapter 4: The Black Angel pwns.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

_"Previously on POTC: The curse of the Black Angel..." Suzaku said._

_Dante can be seen on the deck of the star ship Enterprise D. On the main veiw screen was a borg cube._

_"Mr. Gotwald, send a sub-space message to Admiral Britannia, tell him we've engaged the borg."_

_Switch to sudden quick phaser blasts between the two ships! _

_Then switch to Ranger being confronted by Cornelia in the lift._

_"All you know is how to play it safe. If you're not willing to make the tough calls commander, I suggest you make room for someone who can!"_

_Suddenly switch to the borg boarding the Enterprise. Jeremaih jumps down to face one but it bitch slapped to the ground. "OH! My loyalty!"_

_Dante stands up only for another borg to transport next to him and stab him in the side of the neck with some sort of tranquillizer._

_Suddenly switch to a meeting in the confrence room. Lelouch currently talking._

_"If we can randomize the spread and frequency of the beams our weapons might have an effect."_

_"How do we do that?" Ranger asked._

_"The main deflector dish." Gino replied._

_Suddenly switch to see a borgifeid Dante._

_"We are Locutis of Borg. From now on you will service uz." _

_"It's us you ass." One of the borg growled. _

_"Whatever," Dante replied._

_Ranger glared at view screen. "Mr. Gotwald, fire."_

_"And now the conclusion!" Suzaku said. _

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Later that night at the Govenor's Palace Euphemia was just getting into bed and Sayoko was putting some hot plates in between the matress pads.

"So I take it you had a rough day my lady," Sayoko said standing up properly.

"Well I kinda expect Gino would try to make a move on me but I wasn't queit ready for it." Euphemia replied.

"Well I was really talking about you getting threatened by those two pirates. Must have been terrify." Sayoko admitted.

"Oh right." Euphemia said slightly embarressed. "Terrifying."

"But then there's lord Weinbergs proposal," Sayoko insisted. "That's a smart match."

Euphemia nodded. "Yeah, he's a fine man. The kind most women would want."

"Well what about that Suzaku Kuurugi? He's a fine man to." Sayoko noted.

"That's kinda pushing the boldness there." Euphemia replied.

Sayoko blinked in confusion. "Boldness? Is that even a word?"

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Meanwhile Suzaku was back in the forge working on, more swords. . . Seriously do they make anything else?

"We make prison doors." Suzaku noted.

You're not supposed to comment on what I'm saying.

"Oh sorry." Suzaku muttered embaressed.

Suddenly he noticed the strange silence that filled the town. He stepped over to the door and pooked his head out to find the street deserted by everything except a cat which scurried into the shadows as a malevolent mist settled over the town.

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Meanwhile up at fort Agincourt's super speacil awesome jail for pirates, several arrested Pirates were trying to convince a small blue green alein by the entrance to their cells to give them the ring of key it held in it's mouth. As you could guess they weren't doing so well.

"Oh come on come here!" One said holding a rope.

"You want a bone?" Another asked holding up said bone.

"Give us the key's boy!" Another one said.

"You can keep that up all night buys, the little rat's not going to move." Dante muttered as he leaned against the wall of the iron cell he and Ranger had been confined to. Their gear was hanging from wooden wall pegs just out of their reach, probably to just frustrate the inmates further. The other prisoners glared at them both.

"Well excuse us mr. Ray of sunshine for night having confined ourselves to the gallows yet." One of inmates replied.

"Well pie down would you? Some of us are trying to sleep." Ranger muttered as he sat curled up under a ragged blanket in the corner.

He glanced at Dante.

"Why don't you use your power? Break us out of here?" He asked.

Dante muttered a curse. "I used most of what was left of it to save that girl. I hardly hve enough left to even make my aura appear. What about you? You got a spark?"

Ranger shook his head glancing out the window. "Something about the fog outside, it's fucking with my ability to hold twilight. I don't like it."

"So we're screwed basically," Dante muttered.

"Pretty much," Ranger replied with a sigh.

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Over at the Govenor's palace Euphemia was trying to do some light reading before bed. When to her annoyance the lamp by her bed side went out. She tried to get it to reignite but the flame was dead. A strange chill was setting over the room and she shivered apprensively.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Out on the harbor a lone ship was gliding across the water silently. Along it's sides opened up several wooden flaps revealing cannons.

Meanwhile at fort Agincourt Cornelia, Gino, Guilford, Jeremaih, and a tired looking Lelouch made their way along the upper parapet overlooking the bay. The defenses were lightly manned. Only the night watches and patrolment were still on alert.

"So how is Princess Euphemia doing?" Gino asked casually.

"Well she's a little shook up, but she's perfectly fine now." Cornelia replied. She squinted trying to see through the thick fog. "What's the matter with this weather? Fog in a Caribbean port?"

"Yeah I was wondering that myself," Gino agreed.

Then in the distance there came a faint boom. They came to a halt Lelouch frowning. "What was that?"

Then there came several more booms in quick succession. Guilford looked at Jeremaih alarm on their faces!

"CANNON FIRE!" Guliford shouted tackleing Cornelia while Jeremaih forced Lelouch down! Gino ducked down just a shell slammed into walls of the fort! A second crashed into the center of the fort smashing the gallows into peices.

Gino rose to his feet as people began shooting and soldier's came running out of the barracks.

"RETURN FIRE!" Gino shouted!

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Back in the Jail the prisoners also heard the cannon shots. Dante's ears perked up instantly.

"I know those guns!" He said running to the small window in his and Ranger's cell.

Out on the harbor a single ship, heavily wrapped in fog, could barely be seen firing at the town and fort. Dante's face was grim but his eyes were filled with a gaze of longing.

"Is it?" Ranger asked standing up.

Dante nodded.

"It's the _Angel_," he said queitly.

Several of the prisoner's shivered aprhensivly.

"The _Black Angel_?" One whispered. He stepped away from the bars.

"She's been praying on ships and settlements for nearly ten years, raping, looting, killing, and raping."

"You said rape twice," Ranger said raising his eyebrows.

"I like rape," the other prisoner replied. "Anyways she never leaves any survivors."

"No survivors," Dante suddenly turning to look at them a bemused expression on his face.

"Then where do the stories come from?"

The prisoners glanced at their commerade who shrugged confused.

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Shells rained down on the town and the fort blowing apart houses and shops! People ran about in the streets screaming, trying to find cover and saftey!

Slowly coming out of the fog came around a dozen boats loaded to the brim with heavily armed, raggedly dress, and feirce looking pirates weilding swords, rifles, pistols, knives, axes, even fishing harpoons! The boats pulled up on to the beach and whooping and hollaring the pirates scrambled out onto the shore! Two of them lagged behind the main group. One was dressed in battered red armor and weilding a shot gun with the other was wearing pink armor and had pulled off his helmet to reveal his blonde hair and missing left eye. He was currently cleaning off a small wooden eye.

"Hurry up Donut we're going to miss the fun of blowing the shit out of a town!" Sarge shouted pumping a round into his shot gun.

Donut popped the eye into his empty socket which looked rather disturbing and he pulled on his helmet. "Ready to hunt some bums Sarge!"

Sarge stared at him for a moment. "Donut, that sounded totally gay."

The pirates began to ravage the town breaking into houses, killing people, burning stuff. One little fellow with blonde hair, cat ears, and dressed in Hitler youth group uniform was smashing windows and tossing grenades inside. He ran away from the scene laughing as the grenades blew apart the inside of the shop.

Suzaku meanwhile was getting himself ready to join in and help. He grabbed a pair of swords, a banodlier of knives, and a throwing axe. He rushed outside searching for a target and saw the nazi pirate. He threw his axe and struck the kid right in the back of the head. The pirate stumbled forward appearing dead and Suzaku charged another pirate swords ready.

At the same time up at the fort the battery's on the fort's walls began returning fire with Gino shouting orders.

"Sight the muzzel flashes, they're are best shot at hiting those bastards!" Gino shouted as shell smashed into the fort. Cornelia meanwhile was helping round up troops to try and drive the pirates out of the two while Lelouch had several other trying to signal the _Pegasus_ or the_ Avalon _to try and begin firing on the enemy ship. Gino turned to Cornelia.

"Princess Cornelia! Barricade youself and Prince Lelouch inside of my office!" Gino shouted.

"With my half sister and sister on the other side of town I'd rather die than retreat from this battle!" Cornelia shouted unsheathing a saber and leading a charge with Guliford out into the town. Gino sighed.

"There she goes again with stealing my glory."

"What glory sir?" Kewel asked.

"Oh shut up you jackass." Gino growled.

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Meanwhile over at the Govenor's Palace Euphemia stepped out onto her balaconey watching in horror as several pirates smashed open the front gates to the palace. The two guards in front of the palace were blasted down by one's shot gun. The pirates where now running up to the front door!

She ran to her bedroom door just as there came a hard knocking on the front door. She reached the foyar just as the butler, Alfred, was opening the front door.

"Don't!" She shouted to late.

Alfred opened the front door and Sarge took aim at Alfred's chest.

"Hey, can you hold these bullets in your gut!" Sarge shouted before blasting Alfreds in the chest. Euphemia hardly stiffled a scream and ran back to here room but the Red pirate and the pink pirate had seen her! The two went rushing up the stairs and Euphemia slammed the door to the bedrooms shut behind her and locked it.

She turned about and nearly ran into Sayoko who was carrying Nunnally on her shoulders.

"Princess you must get out of her!" Sayoko said quickly.

"What?"

"Your a royal princess, they pull the whole ransom thing to try and get a quick buck." Sayoko replied.

"It's the klesha thing to do." Nunnally added.

Euphemia nodded. "Okay Sayoko first chance you get, take Nunnally to the fort."

"Understood my lady." Sayoko replied.

Euphemia grabbed the bed pan form under her matress just as Sarge came storming in and got smashed in the face with the iron hot pans. Donut however caught the iron pans with hiis knife.

"Hey who does your hair?" He asked pulling off his hair.

"Umm... I have a stylist?" Euphemia replied.

"See Sarge even she gets a stylist! You think the captian will finallylet me do some work on that do of his?" Donut said looking down at the dazed Sarge.

Euphemia rolled her eyes and released the coals inside and Donut yelped in pain and agony as he received second degree burns. Sayoko rushed out of the room carrying Nunnally. Euphemia ran down the steps as Sarge and Donut recovered from her attack. Sarge vaulted over the railing and rushed to the foot of the stairs raising his shot gun at her.

"Got you now little lady," he gloated.

At that moment several things happened rather quickly. First another pirate entered from the west wing of the palace. The second was that someone on the black angel thought that at that exact moment it was a good idea to fire on the govenor's mansion. So the shell came flying through a window and smashed into the poor bastard who'd come in from the west wing. He smashed into the rope connected to the large chandiler over the foyar and Sarge dove out of the way to aviod it while Euphemia ran helterscelter into the dinning room.

"See Sarge that's why you never say stuff like that!" Donut shouted running down to join the shot gun weilding southerner.

"Eh shut your corn hole Barbie." Sarge growled.

"It's not pink! It's lightish red!!" Donut shouted enfuratied.

"Can a get a medic over here?" Asked the pirate who'd been hit by the cannon ball.

Meanwhile Euphie jammed and candlabra into the poor handles. Turning about she ran over to the mantle peice and reached up for two swords interlaced with metal wire.

"Time to prove Nunnally wrong about the 'those swords are fake' thing," Euphemia said triumphantly.

She gave one sword a tug and the whole peice crashed to the ground and broke apart. The swords were stryafoam.

"OH COME ON!" Euphemia screamed exasperated.

At that moment something heavy hit the door. Euphemia franticly searched the room for a place to hide.

"Sarge she locked the door!" Donut whined.

"Of course she did numb nuts! She trying to avoid getting fashion tips from you!" Sarge shouted back.

"Hey my fashion tips are not awful!" Donut shot back.

"Shut up and stand aside!" Sarge shouted.

There was the sound of Sarge pumping his shot gun and then he fired it at the door handles blowing them off! The two red armored pirates rushed inside to find the room deserted.

"God damnit she's got to be around here somewhere," Sarge growled.

"What makes you think that Sarge?" Donut asked.

"Because that was the only door." Sarge dead panned.

They slowly spread out in the room. "We now your here missy," Sarge called out keeping his shot gun lowered. "Come on out and I swearwe won't rape you."

"Yeah, honestly I don't find you all that atractive." Donut added.

"Donut shut up!" Sarge snapped.

Just then Sarge noticed that the carpet by the cupboard where the silver wear and china was kept was rumpled slightly. Someone had been a little careless and in a place like this carelessness meant only one thing. Sarge raised up his hand and Donut frowned pulling on his helmet to aviod more hot coals on his face.

"We will find you girly," Sarge said slowly. "You've got something of ours."

"Wait you think she has the jewel?" Donut asked egearly.

"Yeah, and we can feel it girly. No use hiding from us. The jewel shards can't hide." Sarge said in a low voice.

Inside the cabinet Euphemia looked down at the medallion she was still wearing since the morning. Even now it glimmered with that same uncomfortable pink light. She looked up to see Sarge right in front of the cabinet. "Hoowdy." He hissed before ripping the cabinet doors open!

"Parlay!" Euphemia shouted before Sarge could so much as raise his shot gun.

"What? I don't speak whatever language your thinking of girly." Sarge said confused.

"Parlay," Euphemia replied her heart pounding against her rib cage. "I invoke the right of Parlay. According to the pirates code set down by Arbiter and Griffith an adversary who invokes the right of parlay cannot be harmed until the parlay is completed."

"I know the god damned code," Sarge snapped.

Euphemia raised an eyebrow.

"Well I skimmed through it," Sarge admitted.

"Also you have to take me to your captian for negotiations." Euphemia added.

"Screw the rules we have guns!" Donut said.

"She wants to be taken to Captian Vergil!" Sarge snapped back. "Besides we have to honor the code. It's the rules."

"Fuck this sucks," Donut dead panned.

"Hey I'm the one being threatened by Pirates, I have the right to complain here." Euphemia shot back.

"God why couldn't you bee a guy?" Donut muttered.

* * *

**Ranger24: Okay and thats the chapter. Fans of DMC will instantly realize just who our captian Barbosa is. If you haven't played DMC, or read the manga, or watched the anime then screw you! Read and review.**


	6. Chapter 5: Captian Vergil Sparda

**Ranger24: Okay update time, hoping to have some new chapters for other fics soon as well such as Twilight dawn and Geass of War. **

Chapter 5: Captian Vergil Sparda.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Suzaku clashed with another pirate who had a massive sword and had bangadges wrapped around him mouth and neck. The pirate grabbed him by the neck snarling.

"May wood Fye," He said.

"What?" Suzaku asked.

"May wood Fye." The pirate repeated.

"I still can't understand you," Suzaku dead panned.

"Rie feed may woood fye!"

"Look just pull down those damn bandages it might help you," Suzaku said.

The pirate sighed and pulled down his bandages. "I said, Say good bye!"

At that moment a sign hanging over them snapped off it's morrings and struck the pirate in the face and sent him flying through a shop window. Suzaku blinked in suprise. "Good bye?"

He glanced about looking for another enemy when he saw to his alarm two guys in red armor heading away from the palace with Euphemia wedged between them.

"Euphie," he whispered.

Before he could take more than one step however the Nazi youth group guy stepped out in front of him holding his grenades.

"What the hell? I threw an axe into your head!" Suzaku shouted.

"Fool, I'm everywhere und no where," the young man gloated before pointing down at Suzaku's feet. Suzaku looked down to see, to his alarm, a grenade with pin missing! There was no time to run!

Nothing happened. Suzaku kicked the grenade away. "Look like you should really make sure your junk works."

The kid gulped. "Oh shit."

"Out of my way scum!" Someone from behind Suzaku shouted before he felt something hard strike him on the back of the head. The world spun and Suzaku fell forward, out cold.

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Meanwhile up at the prison the back wall in the cell next Ranger and Dante exploded! They ducked down in the smoke and debrie looking up to see a small hole in their part of the cell and an even bigger hole in the cell with the guys trying to charm the Alien baby thing. The other prisoners whooped and hollared in delight running out the whole in the wall. One of them paused just before leaving.

"My apologieze friends, you have no manner of luck at all." He said grinning as Ranger flipped him the bird.

Dante sighed and picked up the bone they had been using to try and charm the dog.

"Come here little fella," he cooed to the little alien thing. "Come to uncle Dante."

The alein gave a small blarg and to Dante and Ranger's suprise it began to slowly walk over to them. Dante began shaking the bone more vigorusly. "That's right come on, you little bastard!"

Suddenly there came a loud crash and with a yelp the alien baby fled away.

"NO WAIT HE DIDN'T MEAN IT!" Ranger shouted after it as Dante groaned.

Then from above fell the body of a dead Britannian soldier followed by two men. One had dark skin and hair. He wore a blue jumpsuit and a duerag. In his hands he held a pair of P-90's with silencers. The other was dressed in a white suit, had blonde hair, held a wicked knife in one hand and in the other hand he held a sawed of M1 grand.

"The fuck? This ain't the armory!" The dark one said annoyed.

"No shit dumb ass," Ranger muttered.

The two new comers suddenly noticed the two of them in their cells. Ranger and Dante glared at their two former comerades.

"Well look here Luke, we've got some company," The dark skinned one said mockingly. "Captian Dante Sparda, and his apprentice Ranger-twenty-fuckin-four."

"Nice to see you as well Jan, you fuck stick." Ranger growled.

"Last time we saw the pair of you, you were sitting on that spit of rock shrinking into the distance." Luke noted smirking.

"Looks like their fortune hasn't changed very much." Jan added.

"Worry about your own fortunes boys," Dante said glaring at them. "The deepest circle of hell is reserved for traitor's and mutiners."

At this accusation Luke snarled and grabbed Dante around his throat. But as his hand passed into the strip of moon light from the holes in the walls and windows Luke's arm transformed into a ghastly skelketal limb! Ranger instantly socked Luke who stumbled back out of the moon light. Dante was rubbing his neck disturbed by what had just happened.

"So there is a curse," he muttered. "That's interesting."

"You know nothing of hell," Luke snarled.

The two turned and left leaving Ranger and Dante alone again. Dante began examining the bone he held in his hand.

"That's very interesting."

"Oh boy the way you guys look totally gay!" Ranger shouted after Luke and Jan.

"Fuck off kid!" Jan shouted back down the stairs chucking a tear gas grenade!

Ranger and Dante cried out in agony as the gas filled the prison.

"You and your big fucking mouth!" Dante shouted as his eyes watered.

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Out on the harbor Euphemia sat in silence staring at the massive black ship they were heading towards. It's prow was decorated with the likeness of a beautiful woman holding a dove, from her back were carved to long Angel wings that wrapped around the sides of the black hull. The tattered black sails hung silent as the ships many guns fired on the shore.

"Here we go," Sarge said as ropes were lowered and the boat was pulled aboard the ship. Euphemia stepped off the boat followed by Sarge and Donut. The deck was a blur of activaty as pirates of all sorts rushed about attending to the ships combat needs. At the helm stood a tall man in a long blue coat but his facial features were not quite visible to Euphemia yet. A small pink fured dog trotted up next to him.

Suddenly a large figure stepped down. The redish brown skinned Urk wore his black hair in a pony tail and his fang's were barred. He was dressed in black leather body armor and wore a large broad bladed sword by a leather strap at his hip.

"I wasn't informed we'd be taking on captives," the Urk snarled.

"Well this little lady has invoked the right of Parley with captian Vergil," Sarge replied.

"I'm here to negotaite the cessactio...," Euphemia never finished her sentence as the Urk slapped her across the face, claw like finger nails scratching her cheek. She hadn't been cut but it had hurt like hell.

"You'll speak when spoken to whench!" The Urk shouted raising his hand to strike again.

Before he could hit her again however a gloved hand wrapped itself frimly around the urk's wrist. The urk looked for the source of his interuption and his face paled slightly and Euphemia gasped.

The man standing next to the urk had silver hair swept back into small spikes, his ice blue eyes were cold enough to freeze someone's blood. He wore a blue coat with gold embroidery with a dark blue vest underneath. Black pants matched with a long black sheathed Katanna with a gold embroided hilt. The resemblance to Dante was uncanny.

"And you will not lay a finger upon those under the protection of Parley Lurtz, am I clear?" He said in a flat but intimidating voice.

"Aye, Captian Vergil." Lurtz answered fearfully.

Vergil turned to Euphemia as the small pink dog scurryed up beside him, a slight smile crossed his face. "My apologies miss, many members of my crew are a bit rough."

Euphemia gulped, the intimidation this man seemed to wrap around him terrified even some of the most brutal of the pirates on the deck.

"Captian Vergil, I'm here to negotiate for the cessation of hostilities against port Britannia." Euphemia said in as firm a voice as she could muster drawing on all of her skill with diplomacy.

Vergil smiled apologetically. "Sorry miss we're not but humble pirates and some of those words are a tad bit long."

"I want you to leave, and never come back." Euphemia snapped.

Vergil nodded understandingly. "I'm sorry miss but I cannot acquese to your request."

Euphemia paused for a moment caught off guard by Vergil's formal manner.

"Means no," Vergil said simply.

Euphemia wrapped her fingers around the medallion.

"Okay then," she said firmly walking over to the railings and opening her plam to show the medallion and the jewel embedded in it's center. The pirates along the deck fixed their eyes on the gem. Vergil frowned but his eyes were also transfixed on the jewel.

"My hold is bursting with swag missy, what's one little gem to us?" He asked.

"It's what you've been looking for," Euphemia said confidently. "I recognize this ship! I saw it on the crossing from the homeland seven years ago!"

"Did you now?" Vergil said cooly, the malice that mixed with intimidation was enough too make the blood turn cold. "There's plenty of pretty little trinkets out there young lady, not much of a bargining chip you've got there."

Euphemia shrugged. "Okay, if it is worthless."

She let the chain slither out of her hand. The pirates gave cries of alarm and Vergil's hand went to the hilt of his Katanna! Euphemia caught the medallion by he pinky smirking in triumph. Vergil slowly relaxed his grip on his sword.

"What's your name miss?" He asked casually.

Euphemia cast her mind about for a name, Britannia would get her into more trouble.

"Euphemia, Kuurugi." She finally said. At the name Kuurugi several of the pirates glanced from eachother in suprise. "I'm a maid in the Govenor's Villa."

"Miss Kuurugi?" Vergil said smiling.

"Kyoshido," Sarge muttered.

A sharp look from Vergil silenced Sarge. "And how does a maid come by such a trinket? Family heirloom?"

"I didn't steal it if that's what you mean," Euphemia growled.

Vergil lowered his hands from his katanna. "Very well Miss Kuurugi, you hand over that gem and we'll out your town to our rudder. Do we have an accord?"

Euphemia slowly brougght the medallion back from the side of the rail and held it out for one of them to take. Vergil nodded to the dog at his feet who took the medallion in it's mouth before scampering back over to Vergil hurridly who took it from the dog patting it on the head.

"Our bargin?" Euphemia asked.

Vergil nodded to Lurtz.

"Heave to and stowe the guns! Call back the boats and make ready to sail!" Lurtz shouted and the pirates set to work immedatly. Vergil began making his way back up to the helm Euphemia gave a sigh relief. Then she realized they weren't doing anything to send her back to the town. Panicking She ran after Vergil.

"Wait!! You have to send me back! According to the code of the brethern..."

Vergil suddenly whelled on her.

"First, the sending you back to the shore was not in our bargin so I must do nothing. Secondly, the pirates code only applies to pirates which you are not. And thirdly the code is more of guide lines than real rules." Vergil snapped before smiling coldly. "Welcome aboard the_ Black Angel_, Miss Kuurugi!"

With a nod Sarge and Donut grabbed Euphemia and dragged her below deck.

* * *

**Ranger24: Okay that was fun; Euphemia's kidnapped, me and Dante are dealing with tear gas, and Suzaku got knocked out. Until next time read and review. **

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	7. Chapter 6: Commonder is the word

**Ranger24: Okay here's the new chapter folks.**

* * *

Chapter 6: Commonder is the word.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Suzaku moaned and opened his eyes. He was lying on his belly in the middle of the street with a bunch of minature version's of himself spinning around his head.

_'You spin me right round baby,_

_Right round,_

_Like a record baby,_

_Right round round round.'_

"Oh god I'm getting Spinzaku'," Suzaku groaned pushing himself up off the ground as the events of the attack began flooding back to him. Remembering what he'd seen he instantly began running for fort Agincourt. All the while we passed by people clearing away rubble, taking away dead bodies, and tending to the wounded.

When he came running into the fort he found Cornelia, Lelouch, Gino, Jeremaih, and Guliford looking over a map of the surrounding water and islands in the sea. Cornelia had a bandage over her left cheek and Guliford's left arm was in a sling. Standing by the door however were Grif and Simmons, completely unscathed.

"They took her, they took Euphemia!" Suzaku said hurridly.

"We know captain obvious," Jeremaih growled.

"Mr. Grif please remove this man," Gino said in a tired voice.

Grif tried to take a hold of Suzaku's arm but Suzaku brushed right past him.

"We have to hunt them down! We've got to save her!" Suzaku said in an aggitated tone.

"What do you think we're doing?" Cornelia snapped. "We have no leads!"

Then Grif glanced up. "Hey, that pirate guy Dante."

Everyone turned to face him, making Grif shift uncomfortably.

"He was talking a lot about the _Black Angel_." Grif finished lamely.

"Mentioned it really," Simmons countered.

"Ask him where it is!" Suzaku said eagerly to Gino. "Make a deal with him, he could lead us to it."

Gino shook his head. "Nah, the pirates that attacked the port and the fort left Captian Sparda and his buddy in their cells. They're obviously not allies."

"Or they've got antiquated intelligence," Lelouch added.

"Princess Cornelia, we'll plot the most likely coarse the _Black Angel_ might have..." Gino started to say but Suzaku cut him off by swinging his throwing axe into the table glaring at Gino.

"That's not good enough!" He snarled.

Guliford and Jeremaih glared at him but Gino simply pulled Suzaku's axe out of the table.

"Mr. Kuurugi, you are not a military man or a sailor." Gino said slowly before looking Suzaku right in the eye. "You're a black smith, and this is not the time for rash actions."

Then in a quieter voice he added. "Don't think you're the only one here who is worried about Princess Euphemia."

Suzaku glared at him and stormed off. Lelouch watched his retreating back frowning.

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Meanwhile in the jail Ranger and Dante were trying to force the lock with the bone that they'd tried to charm the alien with.

"Okay twist it a little more to the right!" Dante said through clentched teeth.

"I am twisting it to the right!" Ranger snapped back.

"No my right!" Dante replied.

"We've got the same right!" Ranger snarled.

Suddenly there came the sound of the prison door being flung open. Dante and Ranger flung themselves on the floor looking as tired as they could. Down the steps however came Suzaku.

"You, Sparda!" He said sharply.

"Yes?" Dante said in a mock dazed tone.

"You know about the ship that attacked this town last night, the _Black Angel_?" He asked.

"I've heard of it," Dante said simply.

"I need to know where it makes berth." Suzaku commanded.

"Where does it make berth?" Dante repeated in a suprised tone.

Ranger glanced at Dante who laughed pushing himself off the ground.

"Haven't you heard the stories buddy?" Dante asked rhetorically. "Captian Vergil, and has rabble of douche bags make port at the dread Kamine Island. A place that can only be found by one who knows where it is."

"That made no sense at all." Suzaku snapped.

"To bad kid, that's all you'll get from me. Besides why are you so interested in the _Black Angel_? Thinking of turning Pirate yourself?" Dante asked.

"I would sooner die," Suzaku replied sharply.

"Okay what's your reason then buddy?" Ranger asked sitting up as Dante sat back down fiddling with a peice of loose straw.

Suzaku muttered a curse then he finally spoke. "They took Princess Euphemia."

Dante brightened. "Oh so there is a girl!"

He stood up. "Well if your thinking of swooping in and saving her, thus winning fair ladies heart! You'll have to do it alone pal, there's nothing in it for me or my apprentice."

"I can get you out of here," Suzaku said sharply. This caused Dante to pause and Ranger to raise an eyebrow.

"How? The key's run away?" Dante asked leaning against the wall.

"I helped build these cells," Suzaku continued. He pulled up a bench and turned it on it's side. "These are half pin, barrel hindges." He lifted the bench up so that it looked in place around the door. "With the right leverage and the proper application of Strength, the door will lift free."

Dante frowned walking forward. "What's your name kid?"

"Suzaku Kuurugi," Suzaku replied simply.

Dante quickly shared a glance with Ranger who looked suprised. Then he turned back to Suzaku smiling. "Thats japanese right?"

Suzaku nodded.

"Okay kid I've changed my mind," Dante said slapping his hands on the cell door as Ranger stood up and walked over to join them.

"If you can free the two of us from this cell we'll help you rescue your lovely lass," Dante finished. "Deal?"

"Deal," Suzaku answered.

Dante nodded. "Alright then get us the fuck out of here."

Suzaku nodded and with a quick effort the door lift out of it's position and he tossed it and the bench aside.

"Come on some will have heard that," Suzaku said evenly as Dante and Ranger stepped out of the cell.

"Not without our luggage," Ranger said as he and Dante grabbed their weapons that hung from pegs on the wall. Suzaku frown as Dante put Ebony and Ivory in their holsters.

"Why do you bother with those guns? They've only got one shot a peice?" He asked.

Suddenly turned on him with Ebony and Ivory pointed at his nose.

"I suggest you lower those pistols Mr. Sparda," said a cool voice.

Ranger swore and Suzaku glance around to see Lelouch and Jeremaih standing behind them with Lelouch training a pistol on them and Jeremaih with his sword raised.

"I should have guessed you'd take matter's into your own hands Suzaku," Lelouch said in a relaxed tone.

"Should I alert the guards my Prince?" Jeremaih asked.

"No," Lelouch replied.

"Then what are you going to do?" Dante asked.

"I'm heading up an unauthorized expedition to rescue Euphemia," Lelouch answered. "And thus I need a help."

He lowered his pistol. "So you can count me in with your plans."

"And whatever Master Lelouch does I will aid him!" Jeremaih proclaimed.

Dante smirked shoving Ebony and Ivory into their holsters. "Well if you don't mind I think we should leave before any further interuption's arrive."

"Agreed," Suzaku muttered.

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Around thirty minutes later after grabbing a few things first the five of them were at the board walk. Dante's eyes were fixed on the _Avalon_ which was now crawling with soldier's prepping the ship to sail. Lelouch frowned.

"What's the plan? We can't take the _Avalon_," He asked.

"We need it though, it's the only ship here that could stand a chance of catching the _Black Angel_." Suzaku countered.

Dante glanced over to the _Pegasus_. Suzaku, Lelouch, and Jeremaih followed his gaze.

"We're going to steal the _Pegasus_?" Suzaku said incerdulous.

"Commonder, that's the nautical term." Dante corrected. "We're going to commonder that ship."

Then he turned to face them. "Now before anything else, there's no point going if you guys aren't devoted to this little expedition. How far are you guys willing to go to save this little lady?"

It was Suzaku who answered first. "I'd die for her."

Jeremaih wiped away a small tear near the corner of his eye. "Such loyalty to the Princess."

"Did you just complement me?" Suzaku asked.

"Don't expect many more," Jeremaih growled.

"Well now that that's settled," Dante muttered.

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A few minutes later a few people were walking away from the beach not noticing as one of the row boats suddenly lifted up off the ground and started moving to the water's edge. It made it's way slowly under the water and out of sight.

"This is either mad or brillant!" Suzaku muttered trying to keep his head above the water. He, Lelouch, Jeremaih, Dante, and Ranger were up to their necks in water and holding onto the boat that was over them for dear life, with very little manuvering room.

"Funny how often those two traits seem to be so usefull together," Dante replied.

"I still don't see why we could only use one boat," Jeremaih muttered.

"Because mythbusters prove that two people couldn't pull this off because there wasn't enough weight to hold the air down." Ranger answered. "But now we have three skinny guys, a half devil, and a cyborg who treats his loyalty like its a second penis or his first born child."

At the moment Suzaku felt his leg go plunging through something. He glanced down to see that his leg was jammed inside of a wicker box. He groaned and tried to shake it off but it was firmly attached to his leg.

About twenty minutes later about ten men stood on the deck of the _Pegasus_. They were only the ships watch, the only crew the ship had right now as Gino and Cornelia were trying to regroup their forces to pursue the _Black Angel_.

Suddenly they all turned about as the sound of several slides being pulled back was heard. Standing by the prow were Dante, Lelouch, Jeremaih, Ranger, and Suzaku.

"Everyone remain calm we are taking control of the ship," Dante said raising his hands passively.

"AYE! AVAST!!" Suzaku shouted raising his sword threateningly. This caused everyone to stare at him. Ranger shook his head. "Suzaku, leave this to the proffesionals."

"Sorry but this ship cannot be crewed by five men, you'll never make it out of the bay," the commander of the group said.

Dante smirked and brought Ivory up to his face. "Well it's luck, I'm a half-devil."

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Gino stood on the deck of the _Avalon_, Cornelia still had most of the troops up at the fort securing the town, dealing with the wounded and such so he only had about forty troops with him on the ship. Kewel stood next to him gazing out at the Harbor as Gino tried ot organize the loading of supplies onto the _Avalon_.

Suddenly Kewel grabbed him by the shoulder.

"Lord Weinbreg!" He said alarmed.

Gino turned about to see a row boat making it's way from the _Pegasus_. Piled inside were the ten man watch group.

"Lord Weinberg! They're taking the ship!" The man who had been commanding the watch shouted. "Sparda and Kuurugi! They've got Prince Lelouch and they're stealing the _Pegasus_!"

Gino frowned pulling up a telescope and sighting on the _Pegasus_ which was starting to move out to sea at ridiculously slow rate. On the deck Dante could be seen directing Suzaku to unfurl more of the sails. Gino smirked.

"Poor kid," he said lowering his telescope. "Those have got to be the worst pirates I've ever seen."

Mere minutes later the _Avalon _was hot on the tail of the_ Pegasus _and gaining fast. The row boat with the _Pegasus_ watch group on it turned about to join the pursuit. On the _Pegasus_ Suzaku muttered a curse.

"Here they come." He said to Dante who smirked.

In less than a minute the _Avalon_ had caught up with the _Pegasus_ and had come up along side it. Grappling lines and Gangways were thrown across to the _Pegasus_ and almost every soldier under Gino's command jumped aboard the warship including Gino himself. Kewel landed on the deck beside him.

"Search every cabin every hold right down to the bilges!" Gino ordered not noticing as five figures jumped aboard the _Avalon_.

Dante and Ranger quickly went to work cutting the lines holding the two ships together and Jeremaih knocked off the one guard left behind. The moment the lines wer cut the two ships began to break away with the _Avalon_'s greater sail to weight ratio giving it the advantage. One of the gang ways slide off the railing and fell down into the water with a splash.

Gino turned about, hearing the sound, and his facce paled.

"Everyone back to the _Avalon_!" Gino shouted but the _Avalon_ was already getting to far away for anyone to swing on over. One man tried to but fell short and fell into the sea. Dante made his way to Helm of the _Avalon_ with Lelouch.

"Thank you Sir Weinberg for all your help! It would have taken us a lot longer with just the five us to get this baby under way!" Dante called to Gino waving his hand mockingly.

"We're borrowing the _Avalon_ Sir Weinberg! Private expedition!" Lelouch added.

Several soldiers tried shooting at Dante but the missed and Kewel slapped their rifles away!

"Are you made? You'll kill prince Lelouch!" He snarled.

Gino glared at the stolen vessel. "Kewel bring us about and run out the guns!"

"But with this wind we can't catch them!" Kewel replied.

"I don't care about catching them just get us in range of the heavy guns!" Gino snapped.

"Sir!" A soldier who'd taken the helm shouted. "They've disabled the rudder chain!"

At the same time the row boat, which had pulled ahead of the _Pegasus_ suddenly realized it wasn't in a safe position.

"ABANDONE SHIP!!" The commander screamed like a little girl.

Everyone poured out of the row boat mere seconds before the row boat was crushed under _the Pegasus_.

Gino groaned a slammed his head against the railing.

"Those have got to be the best pirates I've ever seen," Kewel admired.

"Kewel when we get back to the port I'm docking your pay," Gino growled.

"Okay," Kewel said shrugging.

"And then it's bye bye to your gummi bears collection," Gino added.

"Asshole," Kewel growled sniffing back a tear.

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Several hours later the_ Avalon _was well away from Port Britannia. Dante was at the wheel while the others did whatever they could to help sail the ship. Lelouch knew enough about how to Sail and as a body guard Jeremaih had to know how to control a sail boat. It was Suzaku that suprised Dante, he seemed to get a hang of sailing rather quickly. The reason as to why Suzaku was explaining right then.

"When I was a kid I lived with my some family members back home, seeing as how my parents were dead. When I was seven I got a job on a merchant ship to come out here looking for my teacher," Suzaku explained running a whetstone along his sword.

"Is that so," Dante muttered.

Suzaku frowned.

"Why is it that my name being Japanese seemed to change your mind?" He asked.

"Just noticing the fine workings of a member of one of the six houses of Kyoto," Dante replied.

"Don't bullshit me Dante," Suzaku growled standing up. Jeremaih and Lelouch were watching the show now. "I'm not a fool. My Teacher was Kyoshido Touhdo, you knew him didn't you?"

Dante sighed. "I knew him, one of the few who knew him as Kyoshido Touhdo. Most knew of him as Zangetsu?"

"Zangetsu?" Suzaku whispered.

"Good man," Ranger noted climbing down from the ships rigging.

"Good pirate," Dante added.

Suzaku's eyes flashed with anger. "That's not true! He was a merchant marine! An honest man who worked for an honest days wage!"

"He was a bloody pirate and a scallywag." Dante replied.

"Same with most of the kyoto houses, being involved in smuggling and piracy." Ranger commented.

Suzaku brought up his sword pointing it at Dante!

"He was not a pirate!" Suzaku shouted.

Dante sighed. "Put that thing away boy, no point you getting your ass kicked again."

"You didn't win! You ignored the rules of engagement in a fair duel!"

Dante turned a smirked. "Not much insentive for me to figh fair kid."

Suddenly he turned the wheel and the boom of directional sail slammed into Suzaku! He grabbed onto the wood, his sword clattering to the ground as he was swung out over the water!

"Suzaku!" Lelouch shouted reaching for his pistol but Ranger pulled out his own and trained them on both Lelouch and Jeremaih! Dante walked on over to the rail.

"Funny how one event can change a mans perspective," Dante noted leaning against the railing. "And while your hanging there let me slam some street wisdom into that thick skull of yours."

Suzaku gritted his teeth barely holding onto the boom of the sail.

"You see the only rules out here are what a man can do, and what a man can't do." Dante continued. "For example you can accept your teacher was a good man and a pirate, or you cannot." Then he threw up his hands gesturing to Ranger. "And as for me and my apprentice, we can kill you and your buddies. But we can't bring this ship into Horai all on our lonesome, so."

He grabbed the wheel and spun it again flinging Suzaku down on to the deck at Dante's feet. Suzaku looked up to see his own sword pointed at him by Dante. "So, can you sail under the command of a pirate?" Dante asked fliping the sword around so that the hilt was to Suzaku. "Or can you not?"

Ranger at the same time holstered his pistols. Suzaku took the sword panting heavily. "Horai or bust?"

Dante smirked. "Horai or bust."

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**Ranger24: And thats the newest chapter. Yeah not as funny as some but I've been really busy lately. Anyways next time it's the night life folks! Read and review.**


	8. Chapter 7: Ghost stories

**Ranger24: Okay here's the new chapter folks.**

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Chapter 7: Ghost stories.

Diclaimer: I own nothing.

Several hours later Dante, Suzaku, Lelouch, Jeremaih, and Ranger made their way through the streets of a town that seemed more lawless and insane than can be legally described. Prostitutes of every age between fourteen and forty nine stood a street corners trying to get customers. Men drank massive quantities of alchoal, shot pistols wildly into the air, or brawled in the streets. In every other ally there was either a couple making love or a guy getting mugged.

"Welcome to Horia!" Dante said happily as Lelouch, Suzaku, and Jeremaih stared in shock at the utter chaos of the town. "Population, however many drunken bastards decide to pop in. What'd you think of it?"

Suzaku glanced at a man who was drinking booze out of two flaggons and a barrel.

"It'll linger," He muttered.

"Well I tell you boys right now if every town were like this, no man would ever feel unwelcome." Dante commented.

"Every man would also have AIDs," Jeremaih growled shoving off a hooker who'd been clinging to his leg.

As they rounded a corner however a woman dressed in black with blonde hair walked up to them. Dante smiled at her.

"Trish!" He said happily.

Trish smiled back and then kicked Dante in the face before kicking him to the ground pulling out a sword, stabbing him threw it, electrocuting him, and then grabbing a near by motorcycle and throwing it at him before it exploded. Satisfied she walked away as though nothing had happened

"Don't think I deserved that." He muttered pushing himself up off the ground, yanking the sword out, and brushing the soot of his coat.

At that moment another woman walked up with dark skin and red hair.

"Lucia," Dante greeted. Lucia smiled but she glared at Dante.

"Who was she?" She asked.

"What?" Dante asked before Lucia kicked him in the balls and he fell forward again. Lucia walked away and Ranger burst out laughing as Dante pushed himself up off the ground again.

"Might have deserved that," he muttered.

Suzaku rolled his eyes as a woman with brown hair in a ponytail, dressed in red walked up. But instead of going to Dante she walked over to Ranger.

"Ty Lee," he said forcing a smile.

Ty Lee kicked Ranger in the balls and walked off.

"That was uncalled for," Ranger moaned holding himself.

"So where are we going to find a crew?" Lelouch asked trying not to laugh at the idocy of the scene.

"We know a guy." Ranger replied.

"Just have to find him," Dante muttered.

They came upon a tavern which had a brothel over it. Ranger and Dante casually strood on in with Lelouch, Suzaku, and Jeremaih staring in shock at the number of hookers. One, a blonde wearing a bunny out fit sauntered on over to Dante who promptly covered his crotch.

"Welcome back hun you up for some fun?" She asked. Dante lowered his hands and smiled.

"If only we were hunting rabbits, Johnson here?" Dante asked.

"Sure he's up with some of the other girls," the hooker replied. "Planning on joining in?" She added winking.

"Maybe some other time," Dante replied leading the group over to the staircase.

About a minute later Dante kicked open the door to a bed room knocking the door clean off it's hinges to find a bed with a a single guy with two hookers. Dante pulled up a bucket of ice water and threw the contence onto the matress. The two hookers screamed grabbing their clothes and scrambling out the bedroom with towels around their chests. As for the man in the bed he spluttered trying to get the water out of his eyes while pulling out an M6G magnum.

"Alright wise guy! You've just dialed one eight hundred asskicking!" He snarled before Dante stepped into the light. The man blinked in suprise lowering his pistol and Lelouch stared at him in shock.

"Sergeant Johnson?" He said suprised.

"Prince Lelouch?" Johnson said in an equally suprised tone before his eyes fell on Dante. He laughed sitting up on the bed.

"God damnit Dante, you know better than to wake a man when he's sleeping. It's damned bad luck." Johnson said.

"Ah good thing I know how to counter it, by getting the man who you just woke up some booze and giving him a job offer," Dante replied.

Johnson grinned pulling on his shirt, "Yeah that'd just about fix it."

Suzkau promptly tossed a second bucket of water on Johnson who coughed a spluttered.

"GOD DAMNIT I'M ALREADY AWAKE!" Johnson shouted.

"That was for the smell," Suzaku replied.

Johnson glanced at the sheets and nodded in agreement.

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About ten minutes later in the bar Ranger walked past Lelouch, Suzaku, and Jeremaih holding three beers. Dante and Johnson were siting at a private table removed from a small brawl going on at the bar. Ranger threw a glance at the brawl before turnig back to them.

"Watch yourselves in here," Ranger muttered before heading over to join Johnson and Dante at the table. As he did so a red head sauntered over to Lelouch looking severly drunk. She drapped her arms around him.

"Hey handsome. Hicup! Want get nasty?" She said pressing herself up against him. Lelouch looked realy uncomfortable.

Meanwhile Ranger passed out the drinks Johnson, now fully clothed took a long drink before. speaking.

"So what's this little venture you got planned Dante?" Johnson asked taking another swig.

Dante took a swig from his beer and then set it down. "I'm going after the _Black Angel_."

Johnson choked on his drink and set it down coughing. Before he could say anything Dante held up his hand.

"Now I know were it's going to be, and what I'm up against," Dante said trying to relieve Johnson's apprehensions.

"Dante, that's a fools errand. You can't take on Vergil or his men," Johnson said in a cold tone.

"Good thing I'm not a fool then," Dante replied.

"Prove me wrong!" Johnson snapped. "What makes you think Vergil will hand over his ship to you?"

Dante leaned back in his chair.

"Let's just say it's a matter of leverage," Dante said eyes slowly moving to Suzaku. Johnson frowned.

"What are you getting at?"

Dante jerked his head over at Suzaku but Johnson still didn't seem to get it. Dante rolled his eyes before jerking his head a little more forcefully. This time Johnson glanced at Suzaku who was helping Jeremaih get the hooker off Lelouch.

"The kid?" Johnson asked raising an eyebrow.

"That kid was the student of Kyoshido Toudho," Dante said smiling.

A slight smile crossed Johnson's face as he looked Suzaku up and down, a curious expression on his face.

"Is he now?"

Ranger nodded. "As much as we can tell, there's not much chance of their being two guys called Kyoshido Toudho."

Johnson grinned.

"Well I'm thinking we might have shot at this after all." He said a light glimmering in his dark eyes. "I'll find us a crew! There's got to be some rats on this rock as crazy as you two."

"One can only hope," Dante replied.

"Indeed," Ranger added as all three raised their glasses.

"Take what you can get!" Dante proclaimed!

"Give nothin' back!" Johnson finished and all three slammed their flaggons together and drank deeply.

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Meanwhile on the _Black Angel _Euphemia had been confined to a cabin in the aft of the ship. She'd been locked up in the room all day expect to use the toliet.

At that moment the door creaked open and in walked Sarge and Donut carrying a flowing red dress.

"You'll be dining with the captian tonight miss, and Captian Vergil request you wear this." Sarge said.

'Which I personally think clashes with your hair color and all but hey! I'm not the Captian." Donut said cheerily.

Euphemia took the dress and looked it over, not that it wasn't a nice dress but she was uncomfortable with the idea of being with Vergil alone for very long.

"Sorry but could you tell him I said no." Euphemia replied.

Sarge chuckled. "He said ya might say that, and he says if that be the case then you'll be dining with the crew in hte nude."

"But Sarge, nudist night is on thursday! It's saturday, that means disco night in the hold." Donut said cheerily.

"Donut, you're to stupid and to gay to get it." Sarge growled.

"Hey!" Donut said offended.

Euphemia looked the dress over again.

"Umm... just me asking but where did you guys get this?" Euphemia asked.

Sarge and Donut looked a little uncomfortably.

"Well, it's kinda the captian's dead mothers." Sarge said slowly.

"Yeah, don't mention her to the Captian, thats the mistake Sailor Zim made, now he's in a pile of sliced organs in the cargo hold." Donut said sadly.

"I'll take that to heart," Euphemia noted shoving the two out of the cabin.

Several minutes later she had gotten the dress on a lot easier than the other one, it showed a good amount of her back. She heard a strange snickering by the door and she frowned. She glanced over to the door. A small hole was next to the door, she could see the pupil of an eye.

"Sarge scoot over, I want to make sure her hairs right," Donut's voice said.

"Donut, you have no real apprectiation for peeping at a dressing woman." Sarge replied scooting aside.

Donut moved into look through the hole. "Hey Sarge, she's not ther..."

Suddenly Donut gave a cry of pain clutching at a tooth pick that had been shoved into his wooden eye very sharply. Euphemia glanced through the hole.

"Oh sorry, thought you were the other guy!" Euphemia said alarmed as Donut yanked the tootth pick out and the hole eye came out and rolled on the floor! It rolled across the deck and Donut chased after it. The other crew members laughed at Donut's situation as the eye came to a halt under the boot of Lurtz.

"Oh thanks sir!" Donut said happily.

Lurtz grinned wickedly and kicked the eye over to Jan, who promptly kicked it over to Luke, who kicked it over to Schrodienger, who kicked it over to a large brute named Tarturus, who kicked it over to Zabuza, and he kicked it back to Lurtz which made Donut run back and forth between the group of them.

"Oh come on guys this isn't funny!" Donut moaned.

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About twenty minutes later a tall pale man with purple eye shadow and long black hair was lighting candels around a table with a large locust warrior who was setting a well cooked pork on the table. The pale man shook his head.

"Honeslty Skorge why are we doing this crap?" He asked.

"Because Orochimaru, Vergil's a stickler for chivalry. Damn him for being the son of a demonic knight." Skorge growled.

"Well at least none of this will matter once we're famous singers." Orochimaru said sadly, blowing out the match he'd been using to light the candles and the two left.

At that moment Vergil swept in dressed in his usual attire. The small pink dog Courage tortted beside him and took spot in his doggy bed. Euphemia was lead in by Donut and Sarge, Donut looking rather cross about the whole affair on the deck with game of hacky sack using his wooden eye. Euphemia glared at Vergil as the two moron's left.

Vergil pulled out a chair at the table offering it to her with his hand. Trying to aviod a quick bloody death at the hands of Vergil's katanna she took the seat and Vergil took his own.

She quickly set to work cutting at the turkey leg on her plate. Vergil smirked watching her.

"No real reason to stand by ceramony miss," He said casually resting his sword against the leg of his chair. "You must be starving."

That was the damn straight truth. Euphemia's stomach was as empty as a certain blue moron's head. Throwing decorum aside she grabbed the turkey leg and ripped at it with her teeth savagely. Vergil watched in amusement picking up a glass of wine.

"Wine?" He suggested. Euphemia took it from his hands and chugged it down in one swig.

"The dress looks good on you miss." He said pleasently but Euphemia was ripping through a roll. He raised an eyebrow. "Good god how can you eat that much?"

Euphemia glanced up from her second turkey leg. "I have a very high metabolism. It runs in the family."

"Oh," Vergil said comprhending. He picked up an apple.

"How about one of these?" He suggested.

Euphemia reached for it for a moment but then paused eyes suddenly going alert. "You poisoned it didn't you? I've seen Snow White!"

Vergil laughed. "No use killing such a fine peice of work as youself miss."

He whistled to Courage who scurried on over with the medallion around his neck. Vergil took it from him and patted the little dog on the head. Then he raised it up for Euphemia to see.

"Do you know what this is miss?" He asked.

"A pirate medallion," Euphemia said instantly. Vergil shrugged, "You're half right. It is pirated gold but the gem was what I was talking about. This gem is a shard of the Shikon jewel, the Jewel of four souls. Carried by a mortal preistess before she had her body burned with the jewel around her neck and the jewel was later shattered by a poorly aimed arrow shot from a descendant of hers leading to a crazy adventure and hundreds of filler episodes."

"Okay...," Euphie said slowly as Vergil stood up. She quickly grabbed a steak knife off the table and hid it in her napkin.

"See we heard that this jewel would grant one incredible power, but on the shards of the jewel was a terrible curse. Whoever took the shards from the ancient box it was placed in with the ashes of the mortal preistess, would walk the rest of their days as the living dead." Vergil continued.

"I hardly believe in ghost stories anymore." Euphemia said flatly.

"That's what I thought when I first heard the tale," Vergil replied walking around the table. "Hidden on an island that can only be found by those who already know where it is. But when we got there, the chest was there as well. We took all the jewel shards and traded them around for food, booze, and pleasurable company."

Suddenly Vergil's eyes grew dark. "But the more we traded them, the more we came to realize that booze couldn't satisfy our thirst, food lacked taste or quality, and all the women in the world..." He paused suddenly. "Or men in Donut and Orochimaru's cases, couldn't stall our lust."

He looked her right in the face. "We were cursed. Even I, a half Devil suffer from the blight of the jewel shards."

Courage gave a mornfull howl and Vergil scartch the dog behind the ears.

"But there is a hope for removing the curse. The jewel was blood money, recover the jewel shards and shed enough blood over the coins and the curse would be lifted. So we've raided and ravaged the world hunting down the shards." Vergil continued before smiling.

"Thanks to you we have the final peice of the jewel."

Euphemia frowned. "And the blood be repaid?"

"That's why there's no point killing you... yet." Vergil said picking up his sword.

Euphemia's eyes widened in alarm.

"Apple?" Vergil offered lifting the fruit.

Euphemia rose out of her chair trying to make for the door but Vergil blocked her way! She pulled out the knife and stabbed him in the chest! He glanced down at the knife and pulled it out. A small amount of blood coating the blade.

"I have to ask, after killing me what were you planning on doing?" He asked casually.

Euphemia shoved him aside and ran out onto the deck and barely held back a scream. The deck was crawling with skeletal figures dressed in ragged clothes. There were four of them washing the deck, three more lowering the anchor for the evening, and even more crawling amongst the rigging working with the the sails. Several of them noticed her and laughing began making for her! She ran and accidently fell into the hold were several more skeletal pirates were shaking out a quilt large enough to catch her and fling her back into the air! She screamed only to be grabbed out of the air by another skeletal pirate swinging down from the mast. They landed on the deck and Euphemia ran behind the wheel trying to hide. The skeleton followed her and she spun the wheel and his face catching his skinless chin, snapping his head up at an almost ninety degree angle from his neck!

To her alarm the skeleton grabbed his own head an snapped it back into place laughing. She ran down from the helm and duched behind the stairs. Then she heard a sniffing by her shoulder and turned about to see Courage standing on the railing with most of his skin missing! He howled up at the moon and Euphemia screamed.

Suddenly strong arms grabbed her and pulled her about. Vergil held her in an iron grip. He pointed up at the sky.

"Look! The moon light shows our true form! We aren't among the living so we cannot die!" Vergil snarled before turning to face her. Euphemia back up slowly well aware of the crowd of skeletal pirates behind her.

"For seven years I've been starving to death and haven't died! I fell nothing! Not the spray of the sea or blood, the chill of the wind." He reached out and hand to her and the moment it entered the moon light it became skeletal, the clothes became ragged. "Or the warmth of a woman's flesh."

Then he stepped out into the moon light and his skin almost entirely vanished, his fine blue coat became a grey tattered mess, and his hair turned a dead grey. Only Yamato remained unchanged, a devil's blade as it was.

"You'd best start believeing in ghost stories Miss Kuurugi, you're in one!" Vergil said before grabbing a wine bottle and smashing of the top before downing the entire bottle but as Euphemia watched the red liquid splashed against the bones and dyed the grey vest red. Euphemia, absoultely terrifeid ran right past Vergil into her cabin and curled up in a corner shivering uncontrolably.

Vergil slammed the doors behind her and threw the empty wine bottle at the door. Then he turned about laughing. Seeming to think it was all a big joke the other pirates began laughing as well until Vergil scowled at them.

"What are you fools looking at? Get back to work!" He snarled.

Terrified of their intimadating Captian the pirates instantly set back to work on their tasks and Vergil strood back into his cabin, Courage at his side.

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**Ranger24: Well I can say Euphemia had a fun night. Next time the plot moves along a shit load faster. Read and review. **


	9. Chapter 8: Pursuit

**Ranger24: Okay folks say hi to the nice and shiny new chapter**.

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Chapter 8: Pursuit

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The next day at Horai's docks a line off people stood shoulder to shoulder as Dante, Suzaku, Lelouch, Jeremaih, Ranger, and Johnson inspected them.

"Feast you eyes boys! Nineteen of the finest fools I could find! All of them faithful hands before a mast and batshit crazy to boot." Johnson proclaimed.

In Lelouch's opinon the "crew" was one of the most deshelved groups of people he'd ever seen. They were dressed in worn out clothes and armed, if they were armed, with battered weapons that needed matenince badly. First in line was a man with blonde hair in a pony tail with a bandolier of knives across his chest and a short sword on his back. Then there was another blonde man with red sun glasses and wearing a red coat. Following him was a rotund black man, a short guy with silver hair wearing a black coat, a weirdo in a black and with jump suit with white hair, another short guy with blonde hair in a pony tail wearing a red coat, a guy wearing purple body armor holding some sort of medical instrument, a blonde guy in an orange and black jumpsuit, four grim looking muscle bound guys with battered armor and carrying rifles, a bald baby in red overalls, a guy wearing a blue outfit with what looked like a ferrat on his shoulder, another guy in blue tanned skin and his hair in a ponytail, and last of all four figures wearing hats that covered their faces.

"This is you able bodied crew?" Suzaku said sarcastically.

Dante came to a halt in front of the baby. "Weren't you in Nukid's parody of this story?"

Stewie, the baby looked up at him scowling. "Yes, I was the main villian in that one. Now I've been down graded to the roll of the midget with a shot gun."

"Sucks to be you kid," Dante replied with a shrug.

"I swear to god I'll kill you," Stewie growled.

"Good luck with that," Dante said laughing.

Stewie glared at him as he continued down the line. Ranger meanwhile began going in the opposite direction. He paused in front of the blonde at the front of the line. "Hey I know you. You were in Berserk!"

"I don't know what you're talking about." The blonde replied quickly.

Lelouch frowned at him comprehension dawning. "Oh yeah! You're the one who was into Caska but let Gut's have her."

The man sighed. "Yes it's me, Judeau."

"What the hell are you doing here?" Ranger asked.

"Well since I'm no longer in the series, the abridged version's over, and my cameo in Gantz abridged is done I'm kinda unemployed." Judeau said sadly.

"Oh, tough break pal." Ranger said patting Judeau on the shoulder before moving down the line.

Dante came to a halt in front of the guy in blue with the orange Ferrat on his shoulder. "Sailor!"

"His name's Jak," Johnson interjected.

"Jak, do you promise to do everything and anything I tell you even in the face of certain death?" Dante asked.

Jak just looked at Dante crossly, pointy ears and all. The orange ferrat had pulled out a nail file.

"Jak, answer me kid." Dante said feircly.

"Uh... boy's mute Dante the osstel's supposed to talk for him." Johnson explained as Jak opened his mouth to show that his tounge missing Dante winced.

"Okay Osstel guy," Dante said adressing the Osstel.

"My name is Daxter," the osstel replied.

"Daxter," Dante corrected. "Same question I asked Jak."

"Yeah sure we're good," Daxter answered.

Meanwhile Ranger had reached the first of the two short guys.

"Wait a minute your an exorcist!" Ranger said frowning.

"Yeah, I'm Allen Walker." The exorcist replied.

"Why the hell are you a pirate?"

Allen scratched the back of his head. "Well let's just see some people made some bad investment choice's and we're broke. Kanada's working as a waiter, Lenalee's gotten a job at roller rink, and the nerds got jobs at a massage parlor." Allen replied.

"Okay," Ranger said raising an eyebrow.

He glanced over to Dante and rolled his eyes.

"We're screwed," Jeremaih muttered.

"Calm down Jeremaih, hopefully we'll get them to work for us on this." Lelouch replied.

"And whats the reward for this venture?" A voice at the end said. Ranger and Dante glanced at eachother before making their way to the end of the line. Ranger rapidly removed the hats of three before the end and Dante took off the last ones hat. All four were girls. The first had long green hair and orange eyes. The second had short pink hair and blue eyes. The third had black hair and brown eyes. The last however had short black hair, a scar across her noes, and two different eye colors one blue the other red. Dante smiled at the last one and Ranger copied the smile.

"Lady, C.C, Kallen, and Kaguya." Dante said cheerily.

Lady socked Dante and kicked Ranger in the gut. Both collapsed to the ground and the three girls promptly began kicking them anywhere they could get to before Lady held up her hand and thhey stopped. Suzaku sighed.

"I guess you guys didn't deserve that either?" He asked.

"No that was called for," Ranger muttered.

"Yeah," Dante added while Lady nodded vigirously as Dante and Ranger stood back up, only for Lady to punch Dante in the face again.

"You bastards stole our boat!" Lady snapped.

"Hey! We didn't steal it we borro..." Dante was interupted by Lady punching him in the face again. "Borrowed it with out permission with all intention of giving it back!"

"But you didn't!" Kallen snarled.

"Now we can't get money for pizza," C.C said mornfully.

Kaguya glanced at the others in the group and her eye's fell on Suzaku. "Suzaku? Oh my god!" She said her face brightening.

Suddenly she ran over and glomped Suzaku who stumbled back. "Oh Suzaku it is you! How have you been cousin?"

"It's nice to see you too Kaguya but I can't breath," Suzaku said through clenched teeth.

Kaguya stepped away from him and motioned to C.C and Kallen. "This is Suzaku, my cousin!"

"You mean the one who went completly depressingly emo after his father died?" C.C said in a flat tone.

"The very same," Kaguya said as all three began looking at Suzaku's other companion's all three paused on Lelouch who was watching the seen with a cool indiference. To say Cupid's arrow fired three times would hardly cut it.

"Suzaku, who's your friend?" Kaguya asked slyly.

"That's Lelouch," Suzaku replied frowning.

"Lelouch Vi Britannia, Eleventh Prince of Britannia and Seventeenth in line of succession." Jeremaih said stepping forward between everyone and Lelouch.

Everyone slowly backed away from Lelouch, except Kallen, Kaguya, and C.C.

"Not wise to mention that Jeremaih," Johnson growled. "Britannian royal's aren't thought of very highly around here."

"Back on topic, I want my ship!" Lady snapped.

Dante quickly glanced at Ranger, before either of them could say something Suzaku stepped forward.

"You'll get a new one," Suzaku said.

"Umm... Yeah! A new one!" Dante agreed.

"A better one," Suzaku added.

"Which one?" Lady asked frowning.

"That one," Suzaku said jerking his thumb at the _Avalon_.

"That one!" Dante said in alarm but alll the other sailors were now sizing the _Avalon_ up. "That one." He said quickly.

"And we'll throw in a royal pardon all around!" Lelouch added. Everyone conisdered it.

"You all in?" Ranger asked.

"Aye!" All of the sailors shouted as one except Jak who just held up a card board sign saying 'Aye'

"Then get your sorry asses on aboard and make ready to sail," Dante shouted.

The sailors began to rush on the ship Kaguya tossing a wink Lelouch's way and Kallen and C.C having a last look at him.

Johnson shook his head. "I swear to god Dante you're trying to get us killed, you know it's bad luck to bring multiple women on a ship."

"Be even worse not to," Dante muttered staring up at the skies.

"Something wet and annoying this way comes," Ranger said with foreboding.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lelouch asked.

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"Note to self, shut the fuck up!" Lelouch snarled as he spat out sea water from his mouth.

By night fall the ship was stuck in the midst of a tempest! Several sailors were tossing their dinner's over the side of the ship while the rest battled the waves, the winds, and the rain. Dante stood at the helm occassionally shaking his head like a dog sending water droplets flying everywhere. Suzaku, Lelouch, Jeremaih, and Johnson were battling to save a cannon from going over the side of the ship.

Suzaku glanced up at the helm and saw Dante pull out the strange black compass he always carried.

"How the hell are we supposed to find an island that can't be found, with a compass that doesn't point north?" Suzaku shouted to Johnson.

"Ah but we aren't trying to find north are we!" Johnson shouted back as Jak and Daxter took his place so he could head back to the helm.

"We should drop canvas Captian," Johnson shouted.

"She can hold a bit longer," Dante replied a grin spreading across his face.

"What's putting you in such a fine fucking mood?" Johnson asked.

"We're catching up, and I've just gotten my tax rebate!" Dante replied.

At that moment Ranger came crashing down to the deck from the rigging. He pished himself off the deck shaking his fists at the rigging where the weirdo in black with a white hair stood.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! WHY'D I LET YOU IN THIS STORY?" Ranger shouted.

"BECAUSE I'M DANNY PHANTOM! AND I'M IN ALMOST EVERY PARODY ON FAN FICTION!" Danny shouted back.

"WELL FUCK YOU!!" Ranger shouted back.

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That morning the _Black Angel _had come to a halt and Donut and Sarge swept into Euphemia's cabin followed by RAAM and Orochimaru.

"Time to go little lady," Sarge said.

About a minute later Euphemia stood on the deck as Vergil walked out of his cabin followed by Courage. He walked over to Euphie and took the medallion placing it around her neck.

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**Ranger24: Oh shit time is running out for the rescue party. It's either pick up the pace or Euphemia probably gets rapped or mudered. Any ways read and review folks.**


	10. Chapter 9: Don't think it worked

**Ranger24: Okay new chapter folks.**

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Chapter 9: Don't think it worked.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

"Dead guys say nothing... Dead guys say nothing... Dead guys say,"

"OH WOULD YOU SHUT UP!" Ranger snarled at Daxter.

"Oh sorry," Daxter said slipping back onto Jak's shoulder

Suzaku shook his head in annoyance as the crew gathered about the rails keeping theirr eyes wide and alert for anything that might impede them. They were passing through the thick fog and a large cluster of suken ships. about the sunken ships were hundered of large and hungery looking sharks waiting for their next meal. Lelouch glanced over to the helm and frowned at Dante. Suzaku followed his gaze to see Dante at them helm of the _Avalon_ constantly glancing down at his strange compass.

"Where'd he get that compass?" Lelouch asked Johnson who glanced over Dante shurgged.

"I heard he traded it with some chick who won't show up until the sequel," Johnson replied. "That was before I knew him, back when he was captian of the_ Black Angel_."

Lelouch and Suzaku glanced at eachother in suprise.

"What?" They both said at the same time, shocked.

"Oh yeah way back when, years ago." Johnson explained. "He and Ranger were both aboard and they were with Dante's brohter and they were going after the treasure on Kamine island. See Dante knew the map and his brother said seeing as how they shared the ship the whereabouts of the treasure should be mutualy known between them."

His eyes darkened. "That night there was a mutiny. Ranger was the only one who stood up for Dante as Dante's own brother seized control of the ship. The two of them were marooned on some small island and left to die. And Dante's brother sailed off with the _Black Angel_."

"Wait, you mean Vergil and Dante are brothers?" Suzaku said suprised.

"Twins," Ranger said joining them from the rigging. "Identical twins, Vergil's about five minutes older though."

"Doesn't sound like much," Lelouch noted.

"It is with twins," Ranger ashured.

"Anyways boys, when I pirate gets marooned..." Johnson began again but he was interputed by Kaguya.

"He is allowed to keep his weapons but is left with only limited ammo." Kaguya said excitedly.

"Of course since Dante was a half Devil Vergil had to do something nasty to him so he couldn't just regenerate his ammunition." Kallen said joining in.

"Vergil took more than half of Dante's devil powers making him not only weaker but unable to restore his Devil strength." C.C continued.

"Hey! Who's telling the story here?" Johnson growled.

"Sorry," all three said before leaning against the rail occassionally throwing Lelouch a look.

"Anyways after a couple of days the weapons you have start looking real freindly, but Dante and Ranger didn't snap! They escaped!" Johnson resumed.

"How'd they do that?" Suzaku asked.

"Well they waded out into the shallows and waited three days until all manner of sea critters had gathered around them and they made themselves a raft of sea turtles!" Johnson answered in a thrilling tone. "And Dante's used all but two shots in Ebony & Ivory. He's saving those two last shots for his damned brother."

"Vergil," Suzaku muttered.

"Wait? What'd they use for rope?" Lelouch asked.

Everyone glanced at Ranger who smiled. "Human hair, from our heads, faces, backs, and pubes."

The three girls looked disqusted at Ranger but suddenly the ship shook. Dante had accidently scrapped the top sail of a wrecked ship. He quickly corrected his error and took the ship away towards the island. Just at the edge of the fog they could see the _Black Angel_. All it's boats were gone.

"They've already started," Dante muttered.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile Euphemia was in a small row boat with Lurtz, Vergil, Courage, Sarge, and Donut as they sailed into the heart of the islands caves. They reached a darkened shore and the pirates disembarked carrying the spoils of their assault on Port Britannia. Vergil had Sarge and Donut hand Euphemia over to two more guards, one a cyborg with four arms the other a large locust warrior with Dreadlocks.

"HOOOWW YOUUU FEEELLLING GIRRLLYY??" The Locust screeched at her.

"Why are you yelling?" She asked rubbing her ears.

"BECASSUEEE IT'S THEE WAYYY EPIC GAMESSS DESIGNED MY CHARACTER!!" He replied.

"Well keep it down would you?" The cyborg growled.

"FUCKKK YOU GREVIOUS!! YOU DIED IN YOUUURR FIRST MOIVVVE!" The Locust shot back.

Euphemia shook her head in confusion as she was lead into the inner chamber of the caves and gasped. There were mounds of ill gotten treasures from the four corners of the world. All of Vergil's loot for seven years of Plunder.

At that moment Sarge and Donut strolled passed carrying a large trunk.

"Hot damn I can't wait to spend all of this!" Sarge said excitedly. "We can get those Dukes of Hazard cup warmers of always wanted and we can afford your sex change operation."

"Sarge shut up about that!" Donut snapped dropping the trunk which spilled it's contense to reveal a bunch of women's colthes and umbrellas.

Lurtz stared at them and shook his head.

Sarge whacked Donut over the head with his shot gun.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back on the _Avalon_ the four muscled men in armor Marcus Fenix, Dominc Santiago, Damon Baird, and Augustus Cole were making ready a single boat to sail into the caves. Dante hefted Rebellion.

"Okay folks here's the plan, I'll lead an away team comprising of myself, Kuurugi, his majesty, and ensign Fin."

The Star Terk Red shirt Fin glanced at his shirt.

"Aw fuck me," He muttered.

"What do we do if the worst should happen?" Ranger asked as the four of them climbed into the row boat.

"Keep to the Code," Dante answered.

Ranger nodded grimly.

Jeremaih stepped forward suddenly.

"Sir I must accompany Master Lelouch and protect him! It is my sworn duty!" He proclaimed.

Lelouch suddenly pulledout a letter. "Jeremaih, I want you to stay here. If we don't come back give this letter to Nunnally."

Jeremaih took it a looked on with worry. "But sir Lelouch!"

"Don't worry," Ranger said cassually. "They have a red shirt with them. He's the only one who'll die it's how this works."

"Leave the light on!" Dante shouted as the row boat was lowered into the water.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Several minutes later Dante, Suzaku, and Lelouch sat in the row boat while Fin rowed it grumbling all the while.

"What code is Ranger to keep if the worst should happen?" Suzaku asked.

"Pirate's code," Dante answered. "Any man who is falls behind, is left behind."

"No honor among theives I take it?" Lelouch noted.

"You know for having such low opinions of pirates you guys are rapidly turning into pirates yourselves," Dante said casually, lifting up his fingers to list off their offenses. "Rescueing a condemed man, commondering a ship of the fleet, working with a crew of miscreants," he paused as the torch light passed over the surface of the water revealing hundreds of cast aside peices of gold in the water. Suzaku and Lelouch stared at it in wonder.

"And you're both obsessed with treasure," Dante finished with a smirk as they reached the shore and Suzaku stepped out glaring at him.

"I'm not obsessed with treasure!" He snapped.

"Wealth is rather meaningless to me," Lelouch said simply.

"Not all treasure is silver and gold boys," Dante said as he lead them out onto the shore and the sound of men's voices grew louder. They crept around the sides of the cave and paused staring at the scene in the central chamber.

The whole crew of the_ Black Angel _was gathered around a central mass of treasure a top which was a strange Japanese style alter. Standing at the Alter was Vergil with Euphemia at his side. He raised his hands calling for silence.

"Euphie," Suzaku whispered loosening his sword in it's sheath but Dante raised his hand with a look of warning. "Easy kid, there's way to many of them. We need to wait for the perfect moment."

"Now here we are again!" Vergil proclaimed. "Every man among us stood here exactly seven years ago when we were all cursed by this!"

He unsheathed Yamato and in a blindingly fast blow sliced the top off of the altar to reveal hundreds of pink jewel shards.

"Punished by the holy powers and rightly so! But now our salvation is upon us!" Vergil shouted waving Yamato in the air! The pirates cheered and hollered. "Every one of us has shed blood before the mast and by blade now only a little more blood must be shed!"

The pirates cheered again and Lelouch glanced anxiously at Suzaku who, to his suprise, was gone!

"Now who's blood must still be shed?" Vergil asked.

"Her's!" The pirate's screamed.

"And who's blood will we shed?" Vergil asked.

"Her's!" The pirates screamed again.

Suddenly Lelouch heard a loud crack and Dante slumped to the ground next to him. Standing over Dante was Suzaku holding a large wooden oar.

"Suzaku what the are you doing?" Lelouch demanded in a whisper.

"I'm not being his leverage, follow me!" Suzaku hissed before slipping along the walls.

Vergil pulled Euphemia closer placing the medallion with the jewel shard in her hand along with the blade of Yamato.

"Now be a good girl this will only hurt for a little while," Vergil said simply.

Euphemia spat on him.

"If I'm not careful you'll lose a whole hand instead of just a little blood," Vergil noted.

Euphemia gulped and held perfectly still.

"By blood begun, by blood undone!" Vergil proclaimed before cutting Euphemia's palm with Yamato's Razor sharp edge. Euphemia gave a cry of pain and the pirates laughed.

A little blood trickle down the sword and Vergil opened Euphemia's palm to reveal a clear cut across her palm. Blood coated the medallion and jewel shard.

"That's it?" Euphemia asked.

"No need to waste a good thing," Vergil answered before the jewel fell from Euphie's hand and landed amongst it's fellows.

All the pirates stood silent eyes closed waiting! Waiting... Waiting... Waiting.

Donut opened his good eye. "Hey I feel the same as always."

"Did it work?" Orochimaru asked.

"How do we know?" Sarge asked.

Vergil sighed and sheathed Yamato. A bright blue sword suddenly appeared floating next to Vergil and went flying into Sarge's chest! Everyone stared at Sarge waiting.

"Why didn't you shot him?" Euphie asked.

"I don't use guns," Vergil muttered.

Sarge stepped back and the sword exploded in his chest. Amazingly he was still alive.

"YOUR NOT DEADDD!!!" Skorge screeched.

"Hey you threw a sword at me!" Sarge said offened at Vergil.

"The curse is still on us!" Lurtz snarled.

Vergil picked up the medallion confused. Then he whirled on Euphemia and grabbed her by the neck with the medallion still clutched in his hand.

"YOU! Were you taught by Kyoshido Toudho? Are you even related to the six houses of Kyoto!?" He snarled.

"No!" Euphemia answered terrified.

Vergil slapped her across the face and she fell back down the pile of treasure with medallion caught on her dress. The pirates were fumming with anger.

"You two!" Lurtz snarled at Sarge and Donut. "You brought us the wrong person!"

All of the pirates pulled out their weapons and surrounded the two bumbling morons.

"No!" Sarge said panicking. "She was the proper age! She had the medallion!"

"And she has a great stylist!" Donut added terrified.

Euphemia groaned and looked up from the treasure she'd landed in.

Suddenly she felt someone grab her arm. She glanced to her left to see to her suprise Suzaku and Lelouch. Suzaku raised up a finger to his lips. Euphemia quickly grabbed the medallion as they slipped away. Unbeknownst to them Courage was watching.

Jan Valntine pulled up his P90's, "I say blame the captian! Every choice Vergil's made has lead from fucked up, to tentcal raped!"

"Yeah!" Some of the others shouted pulling out their weapons.

"You was the one who sent Toudho to the depths!" Zabuza shouted.

Vergil drew out Yamato glaring at his rioting crew. "If any of you thinks he can take me then please step forward!"

No one did but the Hitler youth group kid raised his hand. "I say ve svill all her blood, just to make sure!"

Suddenly Courage jumped onto of the mound and started jumping up and down on the balls of his paws yammering. Then he turned into an impersonation of Vergil smaking Euphie then into Lelouch and Suzaku rescueing her. Then he changed back to normal pointing to the passage out of the caves.

Vergil glanced down at where Euphemia had fallen and saw to his alarm she and the Medallion were gone!

"The girl stole the medallion!" He shouted! "Find her!!"

The pirates streamed out of the cave and to the boats only to find Ensign Fin lying dead from choking on a gummi bear, also all of the oars for the boats were gone.

"Find the oars!" Lurtz snarled!

The pirates scattered about searching for the oars.

At that moment a woozy Dante came around a bend clutching at the oar Suzaku had hit him with. Everyone paused and stared at him.

"You're supposed to be dead!" Sarge demanded.

"Am I not?" Dante said frowning. He shrugged and turned away only to discover he was surrounded with swords, guns, a chainsaw, and a couple of lightsabers pointed in his general direction. He opened his mouth to say something but frowned.

"Parselly?" He said unsure. Everyone raised an eyebrow confused.

"Parsnipp, party, paraque, portly, par, parmesian..." He said trying to find the word he was looking for.

"Parley?" Donut suggested brightly.

"Yeah that's it!" He said happily. "Parley!"

Sarge glared at Donut. "Parley..." He hissed angrily. "To hell with whoever came up with that damned word!"

"That would be the French," Dante answered.

"Fucking french panseys." Sarge growled. "At least American's have balls, frenchie's are just pussies."

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile Euphemia was pulled up onto the deck of the _Avalon_ by Jeremaih and she groaned when she saw the crew.

"Not more pirates," she muttered.

"Welcome aboard Princess Euphemia." Johnson said stepping forward suprising Euphie.

"Avery Jones Johnson?" She said incredulous. "Why are you a pirate?"

"My tour of duty ran up and they wouldn't let me go for a fourth tour." Johnson said shrugging.

Suzaku and Lelouch clambered onto the deck and Ranger stepped out of the crowd frowning. His appearance confused Euphemia even more.

"Hey Kuurugi, where's Dante?" He asked.

Euphemia looked at Suzaku her face demanding answers. "Dante Sparda?"

Suzaku sighed. "He fell behind."

"Let's get underway!" Lelouch shouted to the crew who disperesed to their stations except Kaguya who jumped him.

"Oh we were all so worried! We thought they might have captured you guys and killed you or something!" She exclaimed while glomping him.

"Kaguya get off him!" Kallen snapped wrenching Kaguya off of Lelouch.

"Come on," Suzaku said to Euphie leading her bellow deck. At the same time however Ranger, Johnson, and Lady watched Kamine island with concern etched on their faces.

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**Ranger24: Okay thats that chapter. Can Dante worm his way out of this mess? Will Suzaku finally confess his feelings to Euphemia? Will Lelouch ever get any peace from the ladies or maybe just screw them all in a foursome? Will I get more dialouge? Will Donut stop acting like a creepy male cheerleader? Why am I asking you guys? Read and review! **


	11. Chapter 10: Utter pwnage

**Ranger24: Okay new, long chapter. Fear Vergil's mad sword skillz. AND JEREMAIH'S LOYALLTY!!!**

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Chapter 10: Utter pwnage.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Dante smiled at Vergil as his twin glared at him from a top the mound of treasure. Vergil scowled at him.

"It's been a while bro," Dante said casually. "But you sure no how to throw a party; no food, no drinks, no band, no drugs, no strippers, and the only babe just left."

"My apolgoieze brother, I didn't expect to see you alive again." Vergil replied coldly.

Dante smirked. "Well it's been seven years since we last meet, how about a kiss for your little brother?"

Then his smirk turned into a scowl as he yanked out Ivory. "Or how about a kiss from this?"

Even as he pulled out Ivory all of the other pirates pulled their weapons on him. Vergil however held up his hand.

"Gent's you all remember Dante right?" Vergil said casually.

The pirates all nodded waiting for Vergil's okay to murder Dante. "Kill him."

"The girls blood didn't work, did it Verg?" Dante said suddenly.

Vergil paused and scowled. "Hold your fire!" He snarled.

The pirates groaned and put their weapons away.

"Do you know whose blood we need?" Vergil asked.

Dante smirked. "Maybe..."

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile on the _Avalon_ Suzaku and Euphemia sat together below deck. Suzaku was bandaging up Euphemia's hand. Suzaku had just gone through how he had guessed Dante's plan to sell him out to Vergil for the sake of getting the _Black Angel_ back.

"What sort man trades a human life for a ship?" Euphemia muttered.

"Pirates," Suzaku answered with a sigh. "Sorry if I'm a little rough, blacksmithing will do that to your hands."

Euphie smiled at him softly. Then she pulled out the medallion with the Shikon Jewel shard in it and handed it to him.

Suzaku stared at it in wonder. "Toudho sent me that, I thought I'd lost it."

Then he paused looking suspicously at Euphie. "Why did you have it?"

Euphie looked uncomfortably at her feet. "I took it."

"Why?" He asked confused.

"Because I was afraid you were a pirate!" Euphemia said looking up with tears in her eyes. "Gino would have had you killed on the spot if he'd found that so I took it!"

"And why did you use my name?" Suzaku demanded.

"I don't know! It was the first one I could think of!" Euphie answered.

Suzaku stood up looking the jewel over. "It wasn't your blood they needed, it was mine. The blood of pirates. The blood of a member of the six houses of Kyoto."

"Suzaku," Euphemia whispered.

"Just go, I need some thinking time." Suzaku muttered.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

"So let me get this straight," Vergil said while sitting at his desk aboard the _Black Angel_. "You inteed to leave me stranded on some beach with only a name and your word that it's the one I want while you sail away on my ship?"

Dante shook his head plucking an apple out of a fruit bowl. "No my plan is to leave you stranded on some beach while an I sail away on MY ship. And then I'll shout the name over to you, then blow all the money you stole on pizza, ice cream, hookers, and booze."

"But that still leaves me on a beach with only your word that the name you'll give me is the right one. For all I know you could be lying," Vergil replied irratated.

Dante smirked sitting himself down and proping his feet up on the desk. "Yes well I'm the only one of us that hasn't commited mutiny so my word is the word we'll be trusting."

He sighed looking up at the ceiling. "You know I should thank you I guess, Verg. If you guys hadn't ditch me and the kid the two of us would've had an equall share in the curse." He took a bite out of the apple. "Funny world isn't it. I love Irony."

At that moment Lurtz stepped inside the office looking cross at the sight of Dante. "Captian, we're coming up on the _Avalon_."

Vergil rose to his feet picking up Yamato. Dante rose to his feet as well, his boots striking the deck with a thunk. The two followed Lurtz out and Vergil pulled out a spyglass and sighted in on the _Avalon_. Then Dante stepped infront of him blocking his view.

"I've had a thought Verg." Dante said brightly. "How's about I scurry on over to the _Avalon_, convince them to park it and hand over your medallion, and nobody gets hurt?"

Vergil lowered his spyglass and smirked taking the apple from Dante. "Dante, thinking like that is what lost you the _Black Angel_ in the first place. People are easier to search when they're dead."

Dante suddenly felt two arms grab his arm and glanced to his left and right to see Grevious and Skorge.

"Look him in the brig!" Vergil ordered.

"By the way Verg your hair looks gay!" Dante shouted as he was lead below deck. Vergil raised up the apple, and then threw it over the side. (Sniff) Bastard, I love apples.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Euphemia came out of the hold to find the _Avalon _in a frenzy of activaty. Sailors rushed about trying to do anything they could to speed up the ship.

"Come on people! I don't want to go through a second eclipse!" Judeau shouted.

She rushed aft where Lelouch stood looking through a spyglass while Lady steered the ship.

"What's going on?" She asked.

"The _Black Angel_! She's catching up with us!" Lady replied.

Euphie looked to where Lelouch had his spy glass trained. There in the midst of swirling fog was the _Black Angel_ gaining fast!

"At it's current speed we'll be able to keep it off us for about six or so more minutes! Increase speed!" Lelouch shouted over his shoulders.

"We've run out of sail though!" Baird shouted back.

"This is the fastest ship in the Caribbean!" Euphie said objecting to Lelouch's observation.

"You can tell them that when they catch us!" Kallen snarled as she try to pull a sail a little wider with C.C.

Euphemia glanced up ahead of the ship. "We're short of the draft right?"

"Yeah what about it?" Lady asked as C.C and Kallen barely manage to a fix the sail, with it nearly ripping.

"Well can't we lose them in those shoals?" Euphemia asked pointing to a small group of islands ahead of them.

Lelouch turned his spy glass on it. "We'd need to lighten the ship a lot but it has a fifty-two percent chance of sucess."

"Any problems with that plan?" Johnson asked as he rushed aft followed by Jeremaih.

"If the _Black Angel_ picks up speed we'll be in for it," Lelouch muttered.

"Let's cross our fingers and hope then," Euphemia replied.

"YOU HEARD THE PRINCESS!!" Johnson shouted to the crew. "Get rid of any of the crap we don't need! Anything that's really dead weight, chuck it over board!" Then he pulled up the whiskey flask he had around his neck, drank a swig and joined in with the crew.

Suddenly Ranger and the rotund man known as Chef rushed up to the hind deck with one of the deck guns!

"Suck on my big black balls bitch!" Chef shouted as Ranger fired the cannon.

The large black cannon ball missed the prow of the _Black Angel_ and crashed into the railing's before skipping onto the deck and striking Donut in the chest.

Everyone on the aft deck clutched at their ringing ears.

"What the hell was that for?!" Lelouch screamed at Ranger and Chef.

"The need to blow stuff up!" Ranger replied.

"But you didn't blow anything up!" Jeremaih snapped.

"Shut up orange!" Ranger snarled as Chef set the cannon down and ran to grab another big black ball.

Suddenly Danny Phantom jumped down and did an epic poose.

"Because I'm in every fan fic in the cartoon Xovers section I say we throw the green guy over board to speed us up!" He proclaimed.

"Oh that's it! Come here you!" Ranger shouted tackling Danny to the deck.

"Do we really need to resort to violence?" The purple armored guy known as Doc asked.

"Shut up and throw stuff over the side!" Stewie, the short baby snapped at him before tossing a box of fish nets over the side.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back on the _Black Angel_ Dante was roughly thrown into a cell in the lower decks that was slightly flooded. Rebellion, Ebony, and Ivory were up against the far wall.

"Apperantly there's a leak," Dante noted as Skorge and Grevious went back to the upper decks.

Dante sighed and sat down against the wall. There was a small hole in hull at that point, just wide enough for him to see through. Floating past the ship were crates barrels and unnesscary items for combat.

On the deck Vergil watched as the _Avalon'_s crew desperatly began throwing their unneed junk over the side. He turned to Lurtz and smirked.

"Tell the boys to prep the guns. Run out the sweeps." He said.

Lurtz grinned wickedly.

Below the crew began run out the gun ports and moved long oars through the opening. Then as RAAM began to beat a drum the crew began to row, increasing the ships speed significantly.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back on the _Avalon_, Suzaku emerged from the lower decks and glanced over to see the two short blondes, Naruto and Edward throwing cannon balls over the side while Jak, Daxter, and a man in a red coat known as Vash the Stampede tried to push a cannon over the side. He looked aft and saw the _Black Angel'_s powerful oars rapidly narrowing the distance between the two ships. He put a hand on cannon giving them a determinded look.

"We're going to be needing this." He said coldly.

Back aft Lelouch cursed as he lowered his spyglass. "They'll be on us inseconds!"

Euphemia groaned and glanced at Lady who tried to smile.

"It was a good plan," She acknowledged.

"Until now." C.C noted in a remorseless tone.

Ranger and Chef began loading the cannon again as Suzaku stepped up to join them.

"We have to make a stand! We have to fight them!" Suzaku said determinded.

"Okay now that's crazy." Lady answered.

"Cousin did you take your medecine?" Kaguya asked.

"Crazy's right what we need right now," Johnson growled joining them.

"Load the guns!" Jeremaih shouted to the crew! "Use anything we have left, nails and crushed glass even! Do it or you'll feel the wrath of my loyalty!"

Then he ran down to help as Ranger finished loading the cannon and laughed. "About damn time we started kicking some ass!"

Below decks the crew began loading the cannons that they hadn't thrown over board with anything they had silver ware, nails, glass, the last cannon balls, beer cans, pornography, condoms, Britney Spears CD's, panties, and even Johnson's whiskey flask.

Back on the _Black Angel _Vergil watched as the _Avalon_'s crew made ready for battle. "Hard to starboard!" He shouted.

Back on the _Avalon_ Lelouch watched the _Black Angel _turn slowly to fire on them. They were in range of the ships guns. He swore violently.

"Their going to rake us with a broad side before they even present a target!" He said as Jeremaih handed him a pistol and Ranger tossed Euphemia a rifle. Euphemia glanced over the side.

"Lower the right anchor!" She ordered.

Everyone stared at her with confused expressions.

"On the starboard side." She said exasperated.

"Oh we know it's just you giving orders is kinda new." Kallen replied.

"And I didn't have to geass you by accident," Lelouch added.

Everyone grabbed onto something as Sokka, a water tribe member of the crew hit the anchor release and the metal weight dropped into the sea with a heavy thunk.

It seemed to catch on something because the chain began to bite into the hull.

"Let go of the wheel!" Euphemia shouted to Lady who released the wheel which spun wildly. The ship swung about and was in a second lined up alongside the _Black Angel_. Vergil glared from the opposing ship at them and the vile crew jeered and roared at the rag tag crew of the _Avalon_! Lady yanked up her rocket laucher, Kallen pulled up rifle, C.C yanked out a pistol, and Johnson pulled up a BR55HB battle rifle. Marcus, Dom, Baird and Cole brought up assault rifles. But Jeremaih and Kaguya trumped them all with a pair of chain guns. Ranger stared at the large triple barreled cannons before glancing at his own pistols.

"You got owned!" Danny proclaimed poosing epicly despite a heavy nose bleed, a black eye, and a dislocated shoulder.

"Fuck you!" Ranger snarled before punting Danny across to the _Black Angel _right in front of Vergil.

Danny looked up at the half Devil before standing up and epicly poosing again.

"You cannot defeat me! I'm Danny Phantom and I'm in almost ever single Fanfiction in this sec..." Before he could finish his sentence Vergil unsheathed Yamato. There were several flashes of light and Vergil sheathed Yamato. Danny glanced at his fingers as they fell off one by one followed by his wrists, elbows, shoulders, toes, feet, legs, groin, lower torso, upper torso, and then his own head fell to the ground in a bloody pile of body parts.

"You annoy me," Vergil said coldly with everyone watching.

Stewie who had been watching from the _Avalon_'s gun ports stared in wonder.

"Oh my god... That took vicous murder to a whole new level! Even Freddy Cougar and Jason Vorahees haven't done something that gory! Seriously kill me now and skull fuck my corpse that is the coolest thing I will ever see!" He proclaimed squealing like a fangirl.

Suzaku, Lelouch, Euphemia, Ranger, Johnson, Lady, Kallen, C.C, Kaguya, and just about everyone else in the crew anime sweat dropped. Suzaku quickly regained his composure.

"Fire!" He shouted!

"Fire!" Leouch shouted as well.

"FIRE!!!" Euphemia screamed.

"Fire!" Vergil ordered.

There was a thundering of cannons and a cacoffony of rifles, pistols, shot guns, and machine guns firinging! Shrapnel smashed against the hull of the _Black Angel _while sold cannon balls blasted through the hull of the _Avalon!_ Several pirates of the _Black Angel _doubled over as bullets ripped across the deck! Everyone on the _Avalon_ either ducked or used Danny's crap as sheilds.

Below deck on the _Black Angel_ however Sarge glanced over his shoulder at the steak knife in a beam before looking at Donut who had a spoon wedged in his eye. "Sarge, I think they're crew is a bunch of retards."

"No Donut they're crew is made up mostly of character's who aren't in a whole lot of Fanfic in this section." Sarge replied.

"So they're compensating by being crazy?"

"Exacto mundo."

Further below decks Dante ducked as peice of crap narrowly missed his face.

"STOP BLOWING HOLES IN MY SHIP YOU BASTARDS!" He shouted up at the crew of the _Avalon_.

Up above the battle was a furious exchange of gunfire and Jeremaih marching along the deck of the _Avalon_ firing wildly.

"FEEL THE FURY OF MY LOYALTY!!" He screamed causing most of the main cast to sweat drop. Except Ranger who laughed.

"This guys is nucking futs!" He proclaimed.

"Well we do always need someone to jump on a grenade," Judeau noted.

"Or date the fat chick," Vash said.

The gun fire continued to fly but the _Black Angel _was slowly gaining the advantage because Danny had thrown most of the ammo over board when Ranger hadn't been kicking his ass. Euphie ducked down behind the railing with Johnson, Suzaku, C.C, Kallen, Lelouch, Kaguya, and Lady. She reached for a fresh mag but found only a single clip left.

"Anymore bright idea's?" Johnson asked.

"It's someone else's turn!" Suzaku shouted trying to reload his empty pistol.

Suddenly Lady pulled out a M9 and pressed it against Euphemia's head.

"We give 'em her!" She proclaimed.

"She's not the one they're after," Lelouch growled firing his pistol.

Suzaku and Euphemia both looked at eachother.

"The Medallion," Euphemia whipsered and Suzaku rushed off for the lower decks.

On the _Black Angel _Sarge and Donut loaded a chain shot into a cannon and Sarge laughed as he took aim at the _Avalon'_s main sail.

"Say hi to my drill instructor in hell!" He shouted before firing the cannon.

The chain shot blasted out and smashed into the main sail snapping it clean off. The timbers snapped and came crashing down towards the decks of both ships!

"TAKE COVER!!" Marcus shouted as the crew of the _Avalon _dove out of the way of the falling wood.

On the _Black Angel _Vergil clamly side stepped the falling mast as it crashed down onto the deck. Then with hollars and yells the crew of the _Black Angel_ threw grappling hooks over onto the _Avalon_ and they caught in the rigging! Then they began swing over enmass yelling battle cries as the _Avalon'_s defenders fired wildly at them.

Ranger yanked out his sword and clashed with Zabuza. Lelouch drew Minamoto and swung it at Orochimaru who effortlessly ducked it.

"You're no match for me boy!" Orochimaru proclaimed.

"ATTACK!" Kaguya suddenly yelled as she, Kallen, and C.C tackled Orochimaru and began to beat the crap out of him. Lelouch merely had an anime sweat drop as he watched.

Meanwhile Suzaku who was in the now flooding hold of the _Avalon_ glanced about for the medallion but couldn't find it in all of the water and empty crates and barrels.

Suddenly he heard a scratching sound and he glanced around to see Courage holding the medallion.

"Hey!" Suzaku shouted rushing over to the dog who yelp and slipped out of a hole in the hold. Suzaku grabbed for the hatch that opened to the deck but to his alarm it was blocked by the fallen mast!

"HELP!" He shouted but his voice was drowned out by the clamour of battle.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

At the same time Dante ducked as another cannon shell hit the side of the _Black Angel's _hull.

"What the fuck did I say?" Dante growled standing up. His cell was flooded up to his boots. Glancing down he noticed Johnson's whiskey flask. He picked it up and uncorked it but no whiskey came out. He muttered a curse but then noticed a welcome fact. His cell door had been blown open. A smirk crossed his face as he strolled out his cell hefting Rebellion and returning Ebony & Ivory to their sheaths.

Once on the deck of the _Black Angel _he watched a hapless moron try to swing across to the _Avalon_ only to be whacked in the face by Sokka and sent swinging back. Dante strolled over to the railing and grabbed the rope as it came back and he punched the pirate off it.

"Sucks to be you buddy," Dante said casaully before swinging across to the _Avalon_. He happened to land right next to Johnson who was about to get mauled by a large Brute name Tartarus. Dante swung out Rebellion and smashed Tartarus across the back of the head and the brute slumped over out cold.

"Dante!" Johnson said in suprise as Dante tossed him his whiskey flask.

"Best to refill that," Dante said over his shoulder.

Johnson was about to reply when another moron leapt at him and he was forced to rejoin the battle.

In the ships powder room Luke and Jan busted open a crate of gun powder and began pouring it across the floor.

At the same time Euphie was struggling for control of her rifle with RAAM who was rapidly over powering her. Then RAAM pulled out a jagged bladed knife, Euphie gulped.

Suddenly RAAM's hand was grasped by Dante's hand.

"No that's not nice," Dante said cooly before Euphie slammed her knee into RAAM's crotch. Dante smiled at her. "Where's the medallion?"

Euphie tried to slap him but he caught her hand. "Scratch that, where's dear Suzaku?"

Euphie glanced at the hold and saw to her alarm the mast stuck over the main hatch.

"SUZAKU!" She shouted. There he was right below her stuck under the hatch! SHe pushed against the mast with everything she had.

Dante was going to help her but he suddenly saw Courage holding the medallion as he began to scurry away from the _Avalon_ across the main sail.

"DOGGY!" He shouted running after Courage.

Back with Suzaku and Euphie, Euphemia had just managed to move the mast a whole inch.

Suddenly some grabbed her from behind and she screamed.

"Euphie!" Suzaku shouted as the water level reached up to his ear.

With no choice left he took a deep breath and ducked his head under the water.

Meanwhile Dante scrambled along the mast close behind Courage. He was just about to reach the little pink hound when the dog jumped up right into Vergil's waiting arms. Dante looked up at his twin and smiled sheepishly.

"Hey Verg, what's up?" He asked.

"Not your luck," Vergil replied taking the medallion from Courage and setting him on the deck with a pat on the head. Then he raised up the medallion.

"Men! Our hope is restored!" He proclaimed!

The crew of the _Black Angel _cheered and the _Avalon_'s fighters threw down their weapons, they'd been beaten.

* * *

**Ranger24: Well oh shit this doesn't look good. Anyways today was my last day of school and since I have a bad habit of getting lazy over summer vacation I wouldn't expect a new chapter for some time. Anyways read and review. **


	12. Chapter 11: Not the booze!

**Ranger24: Sorry for the wait! Summer's my slow season. **

* * *

Chapter 11: Not the booze!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

About ten to twenty minutes later the _Black Angel _was now a good distance from the crippled and battered _Avalon_ with the entire crew of the said ship gathered round on the main deck and being guarded by Sarge and Donut. Sarge with his shot gun raised glaring at them all.

"If even one of you even so much as considers parley I'll blow you ass of and hang it in the galley!" He growled.

At that moment the _Avalon_ exploded and Jan laughed.

"HA! That's how we roll in my neighborhood bitches!" He shouted.

"Suzaku! Euphemia screamed breaking away from the main group of captives only to be grabbed by Vergil.

"Welcome back miss Euphemia! You've had our hospitality once, now how about giving some back?" He said before pushing her into a large clump of his crew who immedatly began gleefully groaping her! She screamed sturggleing to break free of their grips.

"Princess Euphemia!" Jeremaih cried out trying to break through but Sarge smashed him in the face with the butt of his shot gun!

Vergil smirked watching the display.

"Let her go!" Proclaimer a sudden voice. Everyone turned to it's source to find to the relife of some but the alarm of two certian individuals.

"Suzaku!" Euphemia cried out.

There on the railing he stood one hand clutching the rigging, the other holding a single pistol. A ferice light was in his eyes as he glared a Vergil.

Dante meanwhile clasped his hands as if to prey. "Please don't do something stupid, please don't do something stupid..."

"And how do you plan on beating us all if you have just one gun and we can't die?" Vergil replied tersely.

"You can't, but I can," Suzaku replied putting the pistol under his chin.

"He's no one!" Ranger said suddenly stepping between them all. "He's my cousin three times removed on the mothers side by marriage!" Then he added in an undertone, "He joined a celibate order to get chicks."

"Say what?" Vergil replied confused.

"My name is Suzaku Kuurugi! I'm the only son of Genbu Kuurugi, one of the houses of Kyoto. My sensei was Kyoshido Toudho otherwise known as Zangetsu!" Suzaku proclaimed.

Everyone of the Black Angel's crew members looked at him in alarm!

"Great Caeser's toast! He even has Zangetsu's determind glare!" Sarge proclaimed.

"One false move and I throw myself to locker fuck's!" Suzaku proclaimed.

Vergil glared at him. "Very well Mr. Kuurugi what are your terms?"

"Euphemia goes free," Suzaku said immedatily.

"Yeah we know about that one skip ahead a bit boy," Vergil said rolling his eyes in annoyance.

Dante and Ranger were waving their hands franticly trying to get Suzaku's attention.

"And the crew of the_ Avalon _are not to be harmed or done anything demeaning to," Suzaku added.

At this most of the crew of the _Black Angel _groaned in disappointment.

Vergil nodded. "Very well then, we have an accord Mr. Kuurugi."

Dante gave a sigh of relief.

"Well that worked out well," Ranger commented.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Just over a half hour later the _Black Angel_ stopped by the shoals where the _Avalon_ had been trying t escape to only with a large wooden board having been drawn across the deck to the railing and with most of the crew gathered round jeering as Euphemia and Dante were dragged over to it.

"Vergil you son of a bitch! You said you wouldn't do anything to harm them!" Suzaku snarled as Skorge and Orochimaru held him down.

Vergil smirked at him. "I'm not hurting them, I'm dropping them off here at this Island."

Suzaku was about to further object but Orochimaru stuffed a sock in his mouth and Suzaku gagged on it.

"Queit down boy," Orochimaru hissed running his fingers along Suzaku's shoulders.

"Gay!" Dante called over to him and then narrowly avoided the responding knife that was thrown at him.

Euphemia struggled to get free as Vergil strood over to her.

"It's a shame that we must part in such a manner miss. But it seems a waste to get rid of such of a pretty thing," he said. "So I'll be needing that dress back."

Several of the crew members laughed and Dante raised an eye brow.

"Jesus Verg, you put a girl in one of mom's old dresses? That's real..."

"Shut up Dante," Vergil growled.

Euphie glared at Vergil and removed the dress before chucking it at Vergil.

"Hey that was my mother's!" He snapped.

"She was my mother too," Dante noted.

"I said be quiet Dante," Vergil hissed.

Euphemia turned and stepped onto the plank and stared down into the water and gulped.

"Oh get on with it!" Lurtz snarled jumping onto the plank which shuddered.

Euphie lost her balance, screamed and fell into the water. The pirates laughed wickedly as Euphie emerged on the surface spluttering and coughing. Vergil then turned to Dante and pointed at the plank.

"Okay Dante you next," he hissed.

"Hey don't I get a last meal and my gear? Besides you already did this last time!" Dante demanded.

"Oh right my mistake, someone get Dante his junk." Vergil said waving at some of theother pirates one of who threw Dante's coat and weapons to Vergil. "Also if you haven't realized it yet thats the island we made you governor of last time we ditched you."

"You know since theres two of us she should have a gun," Dante noted.

"No Dante, that's where you're wrong my brother." Vergil said strolling over to the side of the ship. "You can be the gentlemen and shoot her before you shoot yourself."

Then he tossed Ebony, Ivory, Dante's coat, and Rebellion over the side of the ship. Dante stared at Vergil in anger.

"You bastard!" He snarled before jumping over the side of the ship and Vergil smirked.

Dante hit the the water and gathered up his gear as quickly as possible before swiming over to the beach. He pulled out of the surf to find Euphemia, soaking wet, sitting on the beach. Dante turned to watch as the _Black Angel _sailed off. He cursed stabbing rebellion into the sand.

"You know thats the second time he's sailed off with my ship!" Dante muttered.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Several minutes later Dante was strolling briskly into the a sparse vegitation as Euphemia followed him.

"What do you mean there's no way off this island?" She demanded.

"I mean we can't leave! What? Is your natural hair color blonde or something?" Dante snapped.

"But you got out of here before!" Euphemia retorted.

"Yes but that was by sheer dumb luck!" Dante shot back.

"What?" Euphemia said confused.

They came to a halt at the base of a palm tree.

"This island used to be used by rum runners seven years ago as a drop off point for supplies and merchandise," Dante replied grabbing a hidden string and pulling it back to reveal a false base for the tree filled with bottles and dried food packages. "Unfortunatly your good buddy sir Weinberg put the rum runners out of bussiness so no hope for them getting us out of here."

"So wait! You and Ranger spent three days on a beach drinking moonshined rum sitting under palm tree's until you could hitch hike out of here?" Euphemia said incredulous.

Dante grinned pulling up a bottle of rum.

"Welcome to tthe Caribbean little missy," he said before handing her a bottle of the rum.

Euphemia glared at him as he walked back to the beah uncorking the bottle. An idea suddenly filled her head and she quickly grabbed several more bottles of rum...

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That night in the _Black Angel's _brig the whole crew of the _Avalon_ was crowded into two cells. Ranger, Johnson, Lelouch, Jeremaih, Lady, Kallen, C.C, Kaguya, Stewie, Judeau, Jak, and Daxter in one cell. Chef, Marcus, Dom, Barid, Cole, Doc, Allen, Vash, Sokka, Edward, and Naruto in the other. Suzaku had been confined to a seperate cell.

Sarge and Donut were busy mopping the floor while Majority of the Avalon's crew mopped and Kaguya kept making advance on Lelouch while Kallen and C.C managed to control themselves in these close quarters. Judeau sighed.

"Well at least this isn't as bad as my last prison experince." He said trying to keep a positive out look.

"Judeau, nobody wants to here how you were analy violated in jail," Ranger growled.

Daxter leaned out of the cell on Jak's shoulder.

"Hey mooks, Jak says you missed a spot."

Sarge punched Daxter clean in the face and he smacked into Jeremaih's face.

"Did you guys know Kyoshiro Toudho?" Suzaku asked Sarge.

The red glared at him from under his helmet. "Yeah, he wasn't alright with the mutiny when we kicked Dante out. He said it didn't sit well with his sense of honor. So we chained his legs to a cannon ball and threw him over board."

"Of course then we found out that his blood was needed to break the curse, talk about irony. We felt really silly."

"That's not irony," Lelouch said.

"Donut we did not feel silly! We were pissed off!" Sarge snapped. "God boy! I am trying to force some masculinaty into you!"

"Good luck with that," Ranger muttered.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile on the island Dante was beyond drunk, he was super drunk. He and Euphie had light a large bonfire on the beach and after a few rounds they were running around it singing a ridiculous song way out of key.

"_We're black hearts and bad men, _

_We're really bad eggs! _

_Yo-Ho! Yo-Ho! _

_A pirates life for me_!" They sang drunkly, well at least Dante.

"Oh I love this song!" Dante proclaimed stumbling over his own feet.

"Don't tell me the moment you get the Angel back you'll teach it to the entire crew," Euphemia said stumbling onto the ground.

Dante sat down beside her.

"And we'll sing it all the time!" He shouted to the night sky.

"And you'll the most feared pirates in all of the EU main," Euphie said laughing.

Dante smiled at her slanting his eyes. "Not just the EU main missy; the whole world."

He gazed up at the stars. "A ship isn't sails and rigging, those are what a ship needs. What a ship really is, is freedom."

Euphie raised her bottle. "To freedom."

Dante winked at her raising his own bottle.

"To the _Black Angel_," he replied before cugging it down.

Euphie however quickly poured out a sizeable quanity of her own drink on the sand.

Dante suddenly stood up dropping his bottle.

"I feel like another round, what do you think?" He said before he fell forward and passed out on the sand.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Dante's nose twitched. He sniffed and opened his eyes. Something was burning.

BANG!

He shot up glancing about wildly. Half the vegetiation had been ripped up and Euphie stood by a tree where she had light a fire while she threw cases of rum onto the fire. Dante practically screamed running over to her.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? ALL THE SHADE!? THE FOOD?! THE RUM??!?" Dante screamed.

"Yes the rum is gone," Euphie said tersely as she grabbed another palm tree leaf and threw it on the fire.

"But why is all the booze gone?" Dante demanded as Euphie turned on her heel and slapped him so hard he crashed to the sandy ground.

"One! That stuff is something that turns even the most decent and up right men into mindless savages! Two I don't like rum! And three, that signal fire can be seen for fifty miles! The entire Britannian military is looking for me!" Euphemia snapped at him.

Dante glanced at the fire and then said weakly, "but what about the booze?"

Euphie shook her head turning back to the fire as Dante pushed himself off the ground.

"Where're you going?" Euphemia asked.

"I'm going to walk off my hangover bitch." Dante growled shoving his hands into his pockets.

Several minutes later Dante was muttering curses to himself.

"Stupid pink haired bitch, getting rid of all the booze and..."

Suddenly he came to a halt and groaned.

Right on the edge of the horizon was the _Pegasus_.

* * *

**Ranger24: Oh sucks to be Dante. Busted again. Until next time folks! Read and review. **


	13. Chapter 12: Dante's deal

**Ranger24: Hey sorry about the wait, got hung up on FMC and Tales of Eternity, the later of which is suddenly in a review slump that makes me very angery.**

* * *

Chapter 12: Dante's Deal.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Several minutes later aboard the _Pegaesus_, Euphemia was wrapped in large warm coat while Dante was in hand cuffs. That wasn't to say Euphemia was happy however.

"What do you mean we're not going to save Suzaku and Lelouch!?" She demanded furiously of Gino.

"Look my hands are tied, my mission was rescue you and Lelouch went off on his own and got himself captured, I'd have to consult his majesty as to whether or not I can launch a rescue mission," Gino replied raising his hands looking slightly hapless.

"You're just scared that the _Black Angel_ will kick our ass's," Cornelia said crossly.

"Am not!" Gino snapped.

"But we've got to save them!" Euphemia said desperatly.

"Just putting in, I say we side on the end of the princess here," Grif piped in.

"Why?" Simmons asked.

"Well as far as I see it if we don't save them now then we'll go back to port, wait for a message from his majesty, ship out again, and then try the rescue. Doing it now just cuts out a whole lot of extra work." Grif replied.

There was a long silence before anyone finally spoke. Simmons was the one who finally spoke.

"Grif, why the fuck is it you only make sense when it comes to avoiding work?" Simmons asked.

"Because I'm a lazy asshole Simmons, but I'm the only one with common sense," Grif replied.

"Then why have you been in jail twice?" Gino asked.

"I was framed!"

Gino shook his head.

"If I might interject, Sir Whieny." Dante said.

"Weinburg," Gino growled.

"Whatever," Dante said rolling his eyes. "The _Black Angel_ was listing a little near the scuburds, it's unlikely she'll make good time."

"Your point?" Gino asked bluntly.

"Well think of it this way," Dante said stepping towards Gino even while shackled and being covered by Grif and Simmons. "Picture it, Sir Gino Weinberg saves Princess Euphemia and Prince Lelouch as well as defeats the greatest threat to marntime commerce in these seas, then is promoted to the honorable knight of one by his Majesty."

Gino paused for a moment before replying. "As appealing as that sounds one can only obtain the rank of knight of one if the previous knight of one dies."

Dante shrugged. "Polotics is a dangerous place, where death comes as posion in a cup, or a dagger in the night."

"And the perspective must defeat the previous knight of one in a duel," Gino added.

"So beat him in a tedious childrens card game," Dante replied.

"And lose my honor and what little dignity I have? Hell no!" Gino snapped.

"Well what if you consider rescuing them as bride price?" Euphemia asked desperatly.

Cornelia raised her eyebrows in shock.

"Wait you'd actually accept his proposal?" She asked.

"If he saves Lelouch and Suzaku," Euphemia admited.

"Oh I love weddings!" Dante said cheerily. "Shame I'm not allowed in church anymore."

"Why's that?" Simmons asked.

Dante tried to scratch the back of his head but the handcuffs prevented it. "I kind wrecked one, but Ranger set one on fire and crashed a wedding epicly."

"Shameless advertising for a one shot by the author aside, I'd at least need to know where the _Black Angel'_s going." Gino said.

"Got you covered," Dante replied. "I just need my compass, so what do you say Sir Weinburg?"

Gino considered it for a moment before finally giving his answer. "Mister Sparda, you will lead us to the _Black Angel _and then you will sit in the brig on the _Pegaesus_ pondering the meaning of the pharse, silent as the grave."

Dante glared at him. "Fun."

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Several hours later however Suzaku was roughly brought into the cave on Kamina island again with Sarge and Donut holding him with vice grips.

"Oh don't be so down," Donut said cheerily. "It's just a prick one finger, a few drops of blood, one curse breaking, and you're free to go."

"Donut, we're not supposed to make him feel comfortable," Sarge growled.

"He's only disowned member of the houses of Kyoto," Jan snapped walking past them. "We spill it all."

Donut then glanced at Suzaku who looked somewhere between angery and annoyed.

"Well, I guess there is a bit of a reason to freet," Donut admitted.

"Oh can it pinky," Ranger growled as he was brought in with Skorge and RAAM holding him.

"Why the heck are you here?" Suzaku asked.

"To help bring on a big joke." Ranger said casually before RAAM stepped on his foot.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile Gino was watching the entrance to the cave with a spyglass before turning his gaze to the _Black Angel_.

"I don't like this little plan of yours," he growled to Dante.

"Oh please, like my plans have ever pleased anyone," Dante said rolling his eyes. "All you do is send me over to the cave, I lure those bastards out, you blow them to little bits with your guns."

"And why exactly do you need your gear for this?" Gino demanded.

"For apperances, I have an image to maintian," Dante said simply.

At that moment their was a distubrance on the deck Euphemia was being pulled into the captians quarters by Kewell and a random soldier.

"You don't understand! They can't be killed!" Euphemia said fervently.

"Right, we'll tell that to Big Foot," Kewell said before moving her inside the cabin and closing the door on her.

Dante glanced at Gino.

"I take it I should go now?" Dante asked.

"Yeah," Gino replied with a nod.

Ten minutes later Dante was rowing alone towards the cave, Rebellion on his back and Ebony and Ivory in their holsters.

He hummed merrily as he rowed towards the entrance, giving a little nod to the anchored _Black Angel._

"I'll be back soon baby!" He called to the ship half imagening it was sighing with sad understanding. For Dante, all was going to plan.

* * *

**Ranger24: Okay I'm calling this chapter done. Short but it gets us moving again. Next time the real fun begins. Read and review!**


	14. Chapter 13: Demon brothers

**Ranger24: Damned writers block. Why does it always have to strike when you don't want it?**

* * *

Chapter 13: Demon brothers

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Several minutes later outside the cave, Gino and a large contingent of the _Pegasus'_s marines were sitting in the _Pegasus_ longboats very close to the entrance. Several soldiers shivered in the cold night air. A light fog lay on the water.

"Hey," Simmons asked.

"Yeah?" Grif queered.

"Why are we here?" Simmons asked.

"Simmons, we've been over this before!" Grif snapped.

"No this time I mean why are we sitting in the boats freezing our asses off when Dante said we should use the big guns on the _Pegasus_?" Simmons said shaking his head.

"Because Dante was the one who suggested we do that." Gino growled.

Simmons glanced at Grif who shrugged.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back on the _Pegasus_ Cornelia tapped on the doors the cabin they'd put Euphemia in.

"Hey Euphie, I get that you're only doing this to save Lelouch and Suzaku. But did you honestly have to basically sell yourself to Gino? Seriously I'd take Suzaku over Gino any day and you know what they say about the 'Sticks' of Japanese people." Cornelia said.

There was no response.

Cornelia frowned and tapped on the door again.

"Euphie are you in there?"

Again there was no response.

Cornelia unlocked the door and opened it to find an empty room with an open window.

"She Houdini'd me!" Cornelia said in suprise.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile in the cave Vergil was just getting to the ritual with basically a repeat of what was going on before.

"You know this was a lot more fun with the girl," Vergil muttered setting Yamato to Suzaku's neck.

At that moment however everyone stopped cheering and chanting. Vergil looked up to see, to his suprise Dante strolling through the crowd. He came to a halt at the base of the treasure pile and waved up at his twin.

"Hey Verg, what's up?"

"Okay I don't know how you got here but it really doesn't matter right now." Vergil snapped pressing Yamoto closer to Suzaku's throat.

"You don't want to do that," Dante said wisely.

"Yeah I think I do," Vergil snarled rolling his eyes.

Dante shrugged. "Your funeral."

Vergil was about to strike but then sighed and looked up at Dante glaring.

"Why don't I want to do this?" Vergil demanded.

"Well, waiting outside this cave is the _Pegasus_, Pride of the Britannian Navy. And those trigger happy bastards are just waiting for you to come on out of here so they can blow you to shreds." Dante said stepping up onto the treasure mound.

"So you don't want me to kill this little bastard?" Vergil demanded.

"No by all means kill the little bastard, I really don't like him. But," Dante said setting a hand on the chest. "Not yet."

He scopped out a handfull of the shinko jewel shards.

"Not until," He said tossing in a pair of shards.

"You've killed," he said tossing in more shards.

"Every," he dropped in another.

"Last," he dropped in another.

"One," he finished dropping in the last shard. Suzaku however noticed that a single shard had not fallen from Dante's grip.

"You've been planning this from the start," Suzaku snarled.

"Yeah kinda," Dante said with a shrug.

"And what exactly are you proposing Dante," Vergil growled.

Dante smirked.

"Seize the _Pegasus_, then you'll have the start of your own private fleet. Naturally you'd take the finer of the two as your flagship, but what about the _Angel_?" Dante asked raising an eyebrow. "Name me captian and I'll sail under your colors, split my plunder with you eighty twenty."

"Fifty fifty," Vergil demanded.

"Seventy thrity."

"Sixty fourty."

"Sixty-five thirty five and I'll buy you a nice big hat." Dante finished.

"Why would I want a big hat?" Vergil deadpanned.

"Okay cut it out both of you!" Ranger snapped stepping up onto the treasure pile. "You guys are supposed to be twins!"

Vergil and Dante looked at him suprised.

"You're supposed to be closer than any other form of brothers be cause your identical! One of you would start a sentence the other would finish it! One of you would get hurt and the other would cry! What happpened to those days?" Ranger demanded.

"Nothings, been the same since mom died." Vergil admitted.

"Look there was nothing either of us could have done!" Dante said.

"Yes there was! We're supposed to be the sons of Sparda and we couldn't even stop our own mother from being mauled by demons!" Vergil said bursting into tears. "And you know she loved you best!"

"She loved us the same Vergil! Dad wasn't there for us!" Dante said bursting into tears as well.

The crowd of pirates couldn't help but stare sadly as their captain threw his sarms around his sobbing brother and they cried into eachothers shoulders.

"Family reunions always choke me up," Orochimaru said wiping a tear from his eyes.

"WHYYYY CAN'T ALLLLL BROTHERLY RELATIONSHIPPPPPSSSSS BE LIKE THISSSSSSSS?!" Skorge asked mornfully.

"It's because more than a thrid of brothers hate eachother for one reason or another." Greivous answered trying to hold back his emotions from sadness.

"Just so you fangirls know this is totally straight," Ranger growled.

Several minutes of totally straight brotherly reconcilation later Dante and Vergile broke apart.

"So we have a deal?" Dante asked offering his hand.

"We have an accord." Vergil said shaking Dante's hand.

"Can I have my stuff back?" Ranger asked.

"Sure," Vergil said wiht a shrug and Skorge grudgingly handed Ranger his sword and guns. Ranger happily put these back in their places.

"So all hands to the boats!" Dante proclaimed.

Nobody moved.

Vergil smirked.

"Gents, take a walk," he said casually.

The pirates grinned pulling out their weapons. They turned on their heels and made to exit the cave. Dante glanced at Vergil frowning.

"Not to the boats?"

As Donut and Sarge were going to leave the cave however Lurtz held them back with one of the umbrella's they had stolen from Port Britannia. Lurtz grinned wickedly.

"I'm going to totally imascualte you two." He growled.

"Won't do much for Donut, he's probably already half a woman," Sarge replied.

"Hey! My armor isn't pink! It's LIGHTISH RED!!!" Donut shreiked.

"Whatever cupcake," Sarge said rolling his eyes.

Back in the cavern Ranger leaned closer to Dante.

"Nice acting by the way," he whispered.

"Umm... yeah thanks," Dante muttered looking at the Tatto on his right bicep which was a heart that said mom on it.

"You weren't acting were you?" Ranger dead panned.

"No," Dante admitted. "DON'T JUDGE ME!!"

"Who said I was?!" Ranger said raising his hands. He turned away before muttering. "Mama's boy."

Rebellion narrowly missed his scalp.

"But you know that was almost as much fun as watching Konan and Axel discussing the problems of their friends..." Ranger commented as a cut away gag began.

**Cut away...**

_Some bed room some where...._

"I can't believe you found cocaine in Roxas's room." Konan said sitting on a bed whil Axel was pulling on a black leather vest.

"He said he was holding it for someone, and he's my buddy so I guess we just have to trust him." Axel replied pulling up a pair of short black pants. Konan stood up and removed the bath robe she was wearing to reveal a leath corset and she zipped up the tall black high heeled boots she was wearing.

"I know, but think about us. With the way we've been doing it we might have kid on the way, and with the amount of men who've slept with me in Nukid's crazy fics it's a miracle I'm not pregnant already. I mean what happens when our possible kid or kids go to school?" Konan asked.

"Everythings a lot different from when we were kids babe. We just have to trust our possible kid or kids not to do drugs." Axel answered.

"I know but it's the other kids I don't trust, you know with peer preasure and everything." Konan said slipping on a chocker and black fingerless gloves. Axel pulled a black mask over his head that had holes for his hair spikes.

"We'll think of something." Axel said soothingly.

Konan walked over and kissed him.

"The safety word is cookies," she said slyly.

"I love you," Axel said before Konan knocked him to the floor.

**End Cutaway.**

Dante, Vergil, Suzaku, and the few pirates who were still in the cave stared at Ranger.

"That was disturbing," Dante said.

"Hey most of their relationship thus far in fanfics has been seen through sex jokes," Ranger said with a shrug.

"So they're really at an emotional level?" Suzaku said suprised.

"Well most guys just rape her. Axel apperantly actually makes love," Ranger replied.

"Okay TMI!" Vergil said putting his hands up.

* * *

**Ranger24: Oh god I couldn't resist adding in some good gags. Vergil and Dante having a brotherly make up, Axel and Konan finaly getting some romance. Why isn't this pairing more popular. Sure it's mostly sex but thats all it's been shown as. Anyways read and review.**


	15. Chapter 14: Party time

**Ranger24: Let the Bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, listen to this song while you read, it gets really freaky. Enjoy.**

* * *

Chapter 14: Party time

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Slowly the crew of the _Black Angel_ swept out of the cavern and slipped sliently into the waters of the cavern. They waded out into the deeper sections before they slipped under the glassy surface. They marched along the ocean floor, a terrible host weapons drawn. They exited the cave and slipped out into the moonlight. Everything about them decayed instantly and the very fish and sharks of the sea fled before their grim visage.

They slipped right underneath the longboats full of Gino's men who were busy staring at a single boat that emerged from the cave.

"I have to say Sarge, that dress really complements armor color." Donut whispered brightly as Sarge rowed.

"Shut up Donut," Sarge growled.

Meanwhile the pirates crawled up the _Pegasus'_s anchor chain and slipped aboard the ship. Silent as death they began killing members of the crew with little difficulty.

At the same time Sarge and Donut slipped past Gino's boats and moved towards the _Pegasus_. On the deck Kewel was looking at them with visible confusion.

"Honestly, all you need is a little make up and you'd look fabulous!" Donut said egarly.

"Oh shut up DONUT!!" Sarge snapped whacking Donut knocking off his hat. Instantly Donut's armor entered its curse state as the moonlight splashed upon it.

"Holy shit! Transvestite Zombies!!" Kewel shreiked!

Sarge whiped out a pistol and blasted the hat clean off Kewel's head. It was then the crew of _Pegasus_ realized what the hell was going on and tried their best to defend themselves from the pirate attack but bullets and bayonets failed to kill those who couldn't bleed to death.

Cornelia stepped out of Euphie's cabin and took one look at the chaos before she yanked out a saber.

"Hey! You're supposed to cower in a corner like a little bitch!" Grevious objected as Cornelia attacked him.

"I'm to badass to be a wuss!" Cornelia snapped before punching him in th face.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile back in the cave Dante and Ranger were going through the Black Angel massive plunder with some interest. Vergil stood a top the mound with the chest of Shikon jewels in it while Suzaku was surrounded by Skorge, Mello, RAAM, Orochimaru, and Tarturus. To say the least Suzaku looked rather cross seeing as how he was going to be a human sacrifice in a demonic ritual.

"You know theres one thing I can't get about you Dante," Vergil commented. "You've been planning to betray everyone around you since the begining just so you can get back to the Black Angel. How the hell can I trust you?"

Dante shurgged. "Me? I'm a bastard. And you can always trust a bastard to be a bastard. It's those straight arrow pricks you need to worry about."

He turned to face his brother. "Because you'll never know when they'll do something completly retarded."

Then in a flash he yank Orochimaru's sword from its sheath and punched him in the face. Then he tossed Suzaku the sword while Ranger yanked out Sol & Luna and blasted the pirates back and Suzaku's manacles in half! Suzaku, although caught off guard by this turn of events, grabbed the sword and slashed at his captors as Ranger rushed to join him drawing his own sword.

Dante swung out Rebellion as Vergil glared at him drawing Yamato.

"It's time we settled this!" Dante said before the two charged each other and clashed blades! They broke apart and began a furious dual; Vergil slashing with Yamato, Dante hacking away with rebellion! To say the least the fury of the two demon brothers was unbelievable but expressed only through the strokes of their blades.

Ranger and Suzaku went back to back against their superior numbering enemies. Suzaku however was a good fighter and Ranger was just plain merciless. It was two on five but odds didn't seem to matter to the pair as sheer skill seemed to dominate the fight.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back on the _Pegasus_ a single Britannian sailor crawled over to the ships bell and rang it three times. Jan however plunged a saber into his back killing him.

The alarm had been raised however. Gino glanced back to the ship and saw to his alarm the chaos on the ship.

"Back to the _Pegasus_!" He shouted drawing his rapier.

"See this is why we should have stayed on the ship! Now we have to row all the way back!" Grif snapped.

"Oh shut up!" Gino snarled.

At the same time Sarge and Donut clambered aboard and stripped off their dresses raising their weapons.

"Time to get some kills!" Sarge said happily blasting down Britannian Marine.

"Yeah! Ass kicking time!" Donut said drawing a knife. "And best of all we're killing red shirts! So we'll actual have a chance against them."

"Donut shut up," Sarge growled. "You just killed my buzz."

"Well I know a guy with a preist, he could rez it." Donut replied trying to be helpful.

"Donut, this isn't World of Warcraft. And it's not like main charaters from Warcraft will be important in the sequal to this debalce." Sarge snapped.

"Yeah good point," Donut admitted.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile Euphemia pulled up alongside the_ Black Angel _fully aware of the feirce fighting on the _Pegasus_. She clambered up the side of the ship trying to keep as queit as possible. She passed by and gun port and saw to her suprise two of the crew getting ready for a large dinner.

"So what are we gonna eat first, you know when the curse is lifted. So we're ready?" Hidan asked Kakuzu.

"I was thinking the pork, it's looking real good," Kakuzu said excitedly.

"And people think their gay," Euphemia muttered before clambering up onto the deck.

Suddenly came out at her growling. Euphemia didn't look impressed.

"Sorry doggy, just not doing it anymore." Euphemia said before punting shoving Courage off the deck. The dog yelped and crashed into the cannon which Hidan and Kakuzu were using as a dinner table.

"What the Jashin?" Hidan said grabbing his sickle.

Euphemia meanwhile rushed down to the brig and found the hapless crew of the Avalon sitting in their cell.

"Princess Euphemia!" Jeremaih said suprised.

"Euphie what are you doing?!" Lelouch asked.

"Nevermind that crap get us out of here!" Johnson demanded.

"Give me a sec," Euphie said grabbing the cell key ring.

Back on deck Hidan and Kakuzu scanned about searchign for whoever had shoved Courage over board.

"Oh man Captian Vergil is going to be so pissed," Hidan muttered.

"Hey bastards! Knock knock!" Johnson shouted. Hidan and Kakuzu turned about just in time to be splattered by a life boat swung by the freed crew of the Avalon!

The Avalon's crew cheered their victory while Euphemia, Lelouch, and Jeremaih rushed to the boat.

"Okay everyone! Suzaku, Dante, and Ranger are still in trouble so heave!" Euphemia shouted.

There was a pause. Then she noticed no one had joined her in readying the life boat to launch. She turned to Johnson and Lady a desperate look on her face.

"Hey sorry girl but, you saw what that Vergil guy did to Danny." Daxter said.

"The Osstel's right," Johnson said.

"Dante owes us a ship as well," Stewie added.

"And there's the code to consider," Johnson noted.

"But you're pirates! Hang the damn rules and the code! There more like guidelines anyways!" Euphemia snapped.

Five minutes later she sat at the prow of the life boat while Lelouch and Jeremaih rowed.

"Damned Pirates," Euphemia muttered.

"Hey we came along to," Kaguya noted sitting with Kallen and C.C at the back of the life boat.

"Yeah but I was kinda hoping for the badass people to help out," Euphemia replied.

"Well to bad for you," Kallen growled.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile back on the _Pegasus,_ Donut glanced over to where they had anchored the _Black Angel _and frowned.

"Hey Sarge," he called to Sarge who was strangling a Britannian Sailor to death.

"What?" Sarge demanded as the Sailor went stiff.

"Is the ship supposed to be doing that?" Donut asked pointing to the ship.

Sarge stood up and saw to his alarm that the _Black Angel _was moving away from the fight.

"They're stealing out ship!" Sarge shouted furious!

"What! Those bastards! We'll be stranded like those people in Lost!" Donut said horrified.

Sarge whacked him in the face with his shot gun!

"Don't ever talk about that damned show!" Sarge snarled.

"Sarge, you're scaring me!" Donut squeked terrified.

"You wuss," Sarge growled.

* * *

**Ranger24: Okay thats the chapter. Next time the epic battle continues! Read and Review! **


	16. Chapter 15: Devil's never cry

**Ranger24: Okay second to last chapter folks. Enjoy. **

* * *

Chapter 15: Devil's never cry

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Back in the caverns the duel between Dante and Vergil roared about the cave as Yamato and Rebellion clashed with blinding speed. They dealt one another wounds that would cripple mortal men but shrugged them off without so much as a wince. Blood splashed into the shallow pools of water and the gold and finer things that the _Black Angels _crew had stolen over the years.

At the same time however Ranger and Suzaku were having a fair amount of trouble as they were out numbered five to two. Orochimaru slashed at Ranger which he ducked before parying a blow from Skorge and then side stepped Tarturus's hammer. At the same time Zabuza caught a hold of the collar of Suzaku's shirt!

"Where were we last time?" Zabuza growled.

"Ummm... You were going to let me go and give up your life of piracy?" Suzaku said hoping the pirate was as dumb as he thought he was.

"No!" Zabuza shouted before he suddenly brightened. "Good try though I respect that."

"Shit," Suzaku muttered.

"You think that's shit," Euphemia suddenly said as she Whacked Zabuza to the ground with a large golden pole. "In the anime I died before the end of season one, in one manga I was merely there to present a positive side to Britannian and that manga sucked ass! And in another I was cut compeltely and in the last one I became Empresses and then I was hated by everyone!"

"That just means... you suck at life..." Zabuza moaned.

"You know that was a rather hasty entrance," Suzaku noted as Lelouch, Jeremaih, Kallen, C.C, and Kaguya joined the batttle evening things out.

"Hey don't blame me it's the writers fault," Euphemia said pointing to Ranger who was still fighting Orochimaru.

Euphemia then spoted Dante fighting Vergil and frowned.

"So who's side is he on?" She asked.

"At the moment ours," Suzaku replied before rejoining the battle in earnest.

"Face the wrath of my Loyalty!" Jeremaih proclaimed charging Tarturus with a harpoon he'd stolen from the _Black Angel_.

"Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty! Is that all you can friging talk about?!?" Ranger shouted as he puched Orochimaru in the face.

"No! I also talk about how much I don't like Japanese people," Jeremaih replied.

"God thats not going to go over well with your PR director," Ranger muttered.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back on the _Pegagsus _serval _Black Angel _crew members had snuck below deck and were using the ships guns to attack Gino's row boats as they rushed back to the beleaguered vessel.

"Hey is it just me?" Grif called over the cannon fire. "Or does this scene seem rather forced?"

"Blame the writer!" Gino shouted back over the cannon fire.

"Well where the hell is he?!" Grif called back.

"In the cave being a badass," Simmons replied.

"OH yeah right! You mean he's stroking his..."

At that moment a Cannon ball hit Grif in the head and threw him into the water.

"Oh my god Grif! The writer killed him!" Simmons shouted horrifed

At that moment however Grif surfaced.

"Thank you comic relief plot armor!" Grif said happily grabbing onto the side of the boat as more cannon balls rained down at them.

At the same time on deck Cornelia was holding up with Guilford and a handfull of sailors and marines trying to hold the ship main deck but their weapons were all but useless. The best they could do was try and dismember the pirates as much as possible.

"Hold your ground Soldiers!" She shouted dueling Lurtz.

"Just stop fighting the comic relief role you were supposed to play woman!" Lurtz roared.

"You want comic Relief?!" Cornelia demanded.

Then she slammed her knee into Lurtz's crotch and he fell to the ground holding himself.

"There's your comic relief!" She said feircely.

Finally however Gino's ships reached the _Pegasus_ and they clambered aboard joing the battle with earnest. As Grif and Simmons pulled themselves on deck they took one look at the chaotic melee and then glanced at eachother.

"Grif, I think we might just die in this." Simmons said.

"Yeah, hopefully you go first." Grif noted.

Simmons sighed. "Oh screw it, come on."

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back in the cavern Dante and Vergil's duel was starting to slow down. Dante was panting heavily while Vergil seemed little phased.

"Why do you refuse to gain power Dante?" Vergil snapped. "The power of our father Sparda."

Dante gave a hoarse laugh.

"Father?" He said as if incredulous. "I don't have a father. I just don't like you, that's all."

Vergil scowled at him. "Well then..."

Suzakuu turned about just then and watched in horror as Vergil effortlessly knocked Rebellion out of Dante's hands and then thrust Yamato straight through Dante's stomach.

"NO!" Suzaku shouted and he was joined by Ranger in this.

"Foolishness Dante," Vergil proclaimed. "Might controls everything. And without strength you can protect nothing." Then he yanked Yamato out and Dante fell back to the ground. "Not even yourself."

Vergil then picked up Rebellion and turned to face the rest of them. They all looked on in horror a few still trying to hold back their attackers. Then Dante's hand trembled slightly and he tried to rise...

Before he could get up however spun about and plunged Rebellion right into Dante's chest, impaling him to the cave floor.

"You Bastard!" Ranger shouted charging froward sword in hand.

"Face my Loyalty!" Jeremaih proclaimed charging in after Ranger sword drawn.

The two clashed with Vergil but barely stood a chance. The Son of Sparda deftly deflected their attacks and then smashed them both across the face with Yamato's sheath. Then he slashed at them as they stumbled back! Ranger barely got his sword up in time to block but Jeremaih cried out in agony as Yamato slashed into the side of his face and he crashed to the ground.

"Jeremaih!" Lelouch shouted shoving Minamoto into Skorge's chest only to be tackled by Zabuza. Lelouch rolled over only to get punched in the face by the crazed Mist ninja.

"I finaly get to kill someone!" Zabuza shouted raising his sword for the death blow.

"NO! Not hot bishie!" Kaguya leaping bright in the way.

"Kaguya!" Kallen shouted but it was to late. Zabuza plunged his sword into Kaguya's chest and then yanked it out. Kaguya collapsed to the ground next to Lelouch bleeding heavily.

Zabuza rolled his eyes before adjusting his sword to try again. "Okay now you...!"

"Kallen punch!" Kallen shouted as she suddenly came up and slammed her fist into Zabuza's face. The ninja was thrown off of Lelouch and slammed head first into a crate.

"Oh fuck you bitch!" Zabuza shouted from inside the crate.

Kallen pulled Lelouch to his feet and he quickly checked Kaguya's pulse.

"She's dead," Lelouch said dismally.

"Well there goes the awesome foursome idea," C.C said whistfully.

Lelouch blinked in confusion. "What?"

At the same time Vergil viscously attacked Ranger with Yamato. Ranger, skilled as he was, was simply no match for a Son of Sparda. Vergil deftly blocked Ranger's attempt to counter and smacked him under the chin with Yamato's pommel before making a slash at Ranger's chest. Ranger barely back stepped in time and Yamato sliced soundlessly through Ranger's black vest. The Ranger made a furious slash at Vergil with both hands but was meet by Yamato. The two blades strained against one another for a moment before Vergil sent Ranger's sword spiraling into the air. Ranger reached for his pistols but Yamato was already at his throat. Vergil stared at him coldly.

"You fight well, but you're only a mere human," Vergil commented pressing the tip of the katanna against Ranger's neck.

"And a mere human," Vergil continued. "Cannot hope to defeat a Devil."

Suddenly Vergil's eyes widened and he whirled about. Everyone stopped fighting and turned to look at Dante. Rebellion was glowing a dark red, a terrible dark red. Dante's whole body shook, surrounded a similar red glow.

"So it's finally happened." Vergil muttered.

Then Rebellion's skeletal eyes flashed red and the skull's maw opened revealing sharp teeth! The horns became more pronouced and the crossguard split from the hilt to form a true cross guard and the blade shot into the air as Dante rose to his feet with a mighty roar! Then there was a flash and Dante transfromed into a thing of true terror! Small black wings jutted from his back, his whole form became more stream lined, he looked truly like a... like a...

'Like a devil,' Euphemia thought with a shiver.

Dante raised a hand and caught Rebellion and spun it about into his ready grip. Vergil scowled at him.

"I see a devil has awakened within you as well brother," he commented raising Yamato, a dark blue glow suddenly surrounded him. "But if its a Devil Trigger fight you want..." Then there was a flash and Vergil appeared now similar to Dante, more demon than human.

"Then it's a Devil trigger fight you'll get!" Vergil roared charging Dante who meet his charge with a roar of his own!

"So this is what Ranger was trying to get to be forcing all of those scenes," Suzaku muttered.

Ranger nodded picking up his sword as Lelouch and Kallen rushed to Jeremaih's side.

"Yep," Ranger replied as Dante and Vergil clashed and their swords rang like bells as the clashed against one another. "There is always a method to my madness."

"Umm guys... Less talky, more saving our asses!" Euphie said as the pirates charged them.

"Oh right," Ranger said raising his sword ready for the battle.

Meanwhile Vergil breifly gained the upper hand on Dante and plunged his sword into Dante's heart!

"Ha! Take that!" Vergil mocked!

Dante stumbled back however and into a ray of moonlight. His Devil trigger form suddenly became more skeletal and Dante raised a hand revealing the shard of the shikkon jewel he'd stolen. Vergil's eyes flashed in anger. Dante gave him a toothy smirk.

"Couldn't resist bro," he replied before resuming his attack on Vergil! The two battled about the chamber in a battle of the ages that was so terrible, yet so badass none could really ignore it for long. This was sibling rivalry at it's deadliest.

At the same time Euphie rammed Schordinger through on the pole shed hit Zabuza with and the spit Skorge on it! The two cried out in pain but then Lelouch and Kallen shoved Zabuza onto the pole and then Ranger impaled Tarturus on it. As the four struggled to move C.C shoved Orochimaru to the pole and the five stumbled into the moon light.

"You know normally I prefer thrust rods into little boys not being thrust onto one!" Orochimaru said in annoyance.

Ranger promptly shot him in the head.

"Freak," He muttered.

Euphie then pulled grenade bag off of Schordinger and then she and the rest shoved the five of them into the moon light. Then Euphie pulled the pins from the grenades and shoved them int Schordinger's stomach before everyone pushed one last time and the pirates stumbled out of the moonlight. Schordinger grabbed at his stomach desperatly but it was to late. He gulped and looked up.

"Not fair," he moaned before he exploded taking all of the other pirates with him.

"Alright! Five down one utter badass to go!" Euphemia said happily.

"What about Jeremaih?" Lelouch asked.

Ranger shrugged. "Don't worry I'll keep him around."

"And how do you plan on doing that he's bleeding to death?" Kallen demanded.

Ranger smirked. "I'm the author girl, here I'm god. If I say give Lelouch a BJ..."

Suddenly Kallen's eyes glazed over and she turned to Lelouch.

"Umm... what are you..." Lelouch started before she tackled him and began pulling off his pants.

"Oh nice work!" Suzaku said in annoyance averting his eyes and trying to ignore Lelouch's moans.

Ranger smiled sheepishly. "Whoops."

C.C promptly slapped him and then kicked him in the groin. He collapsed to the ground in paain holding himself.

"What'd I do?" He groaned.

At the same time Dante and Vergil both slashed at eachother's legs and the two of them stumbled to the ground panting heavily.

"Come on Dante!" Vergil snapped. "We're two immortals battling forever until judgement day comes upon us!"

Dante shrugged rising to his feet.

"Or you could surrender." He pointed out.

Vergil growled and rose to his feet slashing again. They blocked one anothers blows without much difficulty, the two were evenly matched. The very stones beneath their feet tremble and the sound of their swords clashing helped to helped to drown out Lelouch's moans. The fight dragged on and on in such epicness that it can hardly be described.

"Umm... Suzaku," Euphie said averting her gaze from Lelouch and Kallen.

"Yeah," Suzaku said also trying to avoid looking at the scene.

"Shouldn't you break the curse now or something?" She said.

Suzaku face palmed.

"Oh shit yeah!" He said running up to the stone chest.

Dante tossed him his peice to the shikkon jewel and then shoved Vergil back. Vergil scowled at him but then summoned one of his glowing blow swords and pointed it at Euphemia who had been trying to get C.C off of Ranger, whom she was beating the poop out of. Euphemia froze at the sight of the blade and Vergil gritted his teeth in rage!

BANG! BANG!

Everyone froze, including Kallen who sat up looking confused. Then she realized she was on top of Lelouch who was paning heavily and she jumped up red in the face.

Dante stood there with Ebony and Ivory smoking and Vergil stood with two holes on his chest right where his heart was. Vergil glanced at his wounds and then laughed. He laughed and insane laugh. A laugh only true madness could bring on. Finally he stopped and smirked at Dante, icy blue eyes glimmering in the darkness as both he and Dante reverted to their human forms.

"Seven years you've charging up that shot for me Dante, and now you burn it now. You wasted what power you have left." Vergil mocked.

"He didn't waste it!" Suzaku proclaimed fericly.

Vergil looked up at the chest to see Suzaku drop in the last two jewel shards. They fell into the chest, dripping with blood. Suzaku raised his open palm to reveal a scratch bleeding red blood. Vergil's eyes widened in horror and he fell to his knees as blood began to pour from his chest. The spell Dante had caste with bullets was one Vergil couldn't defend against.

"Am I... being defeated?" He whipsered lifting his head up to glare at Dante.

"That all you've got in you?" Dante growled. "Come on show me what you've got."

Vergil snarled and rushed towards Dante, barely keeping a steady grip on Yamato. Dante meet Vergil's charge and there was spray of blood and a cry of agony. Vergil stumbled forward blood pouring down his coat.

Dante turned to face his brother stoney faced. Vergil stuggled to stand up straight but each breath seemed to cause him pain.

"No one else can have this Dante," he said suddenly pulling out a pink amulet from around his neck. for a moment Euphie thought it was another shikkon jewel shard but it was to large to be the jewel.

"It's mine," Vergil growled. "It belongs to a Son..." His eyes grew misty.

"Of... Sparda..." He whispered before he fell back to the floor and into a pool of water. Dante gazed upon his brothers corpse silently fists clentched. Then he lowered his head. Euphemia frowned and walked up beside him.

"Are you crying?" She asked.

"Devil's never cry," he growled.

Euphemia sighed. "Well I guess even a Devil may cry when he loses a loved one."

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Meanwhile on the _Pegasus_ all of the pirates suddenly stopped fighting. Something was wrong and they knew it. They glanced down at their bodies and then up at the moon light gazing down upon them. Luke Valentine and several others collapsed dead from their wounds and the rest raised their hands and dropped their weapons as the Britannains surrounded them. Sarge and Donut found themselves at the mercy of Grif and Simmons's bayonets.

"Donut, somehow I feel it's the fat guy in front off us's fault we're in this prediciment and I desperatly want to beat his ass to death." Sarge growled to Donut.

"Oh fuck you," Grif growled waving his bayonet threateningly at Sarge.

"Parley?" Donut said hopefully.

"The ship is our's men!" Gino proclaimed. The Britannian's cheered their victory while keeping their weapons pointed at the now no longer immortal pirates.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Back in the cavern Dante and Ranger were going through the piles of loot while Kallen expressly apologiezed to Lelouch for her behavior while he patched up Jeremaih. C.C was glaring at Ranger while Euphie and Suzaku sat together.

"So wait let me get this straight," Suzaku said looking at Euphie. "You agreed to marry Gino to convince him to come and save our asses?"

Euphie nodded sadly.

Suzaku groaned.

"Look it was the only thing I could think of on short notice," Euphie admitted.

"Oh gee that makes me feel a whole lot better," Suzaku said rolling his eyes.

Euphemia muttered something under her breath before she stood up and walked away. Suzaku sighed sadly.

"You know kid," Dante said walking up next to him bedecked with jewels and treasure. "If you wanted to make a move of some kind that would have been the time to it."

"Oh shut up," Suzaku growled.

Dante smiled. "Well let's all get out of here then, and if you'd be kind enough to drop me off at the _Black Angel_..."

Ten minutes later.

"Aw shit," Dante muttered.

"Yeah sorry forgot to mention that little detail," Euphie said rubbing the back of her head.

The _Black Angel_ was long gone and the only ship insight now was the _Pegasus_ that they could already see was bearing down on them.

"We're fucked," Kallen said dryly.

"Well technically you fucked Lelouch," Ranger noted before he got punched in the face by both her and C.C blood spraying from his nose as there was loud crack.

"Seriously though, I'm pretty sure this whole mess won't end well," Lelouch commented.

"Well if you quickly knocked up Kallen and C.C they'd be allowed to live for a little while longer," Dante noted.

"True they don't hang pregnant women," Lelouch agreed before Kallen and C.C punched both he and Dante in the face.

"Oh don't worry," Ranger said lifting himself up holding his noes between his fingers. "In the words of a great Philosopher, it will all buff out."

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**Ranger24: Yeah this won't go well. Read and review.**


	17. Chapter 16: And really bad eggs

**Ranger24: Last Chapter is here. Enjoy the free booze. **

* * *

Chapter 16: And really bad eggs.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

"You were saying?" Kallen growled to Ranger several days later as they stood a top the gallows in fort Agincourt. Dante was being fitted with a nose by the executioner and they stood by under heavy guard.

"Oh shut up," Ranger hissed.

All of the town was out watching the procedings dressed in their sunday best. Lelouch's fangirls had come with pitch forks and torches to deal with Kalllen after they heard about the BJ which a certain green dressed pirate had let slip. Euphemia stood grimly beside Cornelia, Guilford, Lelouch, Nunnaly, Gino, and Jeremaih who now had a really cool looking prostethic right eye.

"This is wrong," she muttered.

"We all have to face judgement for our crimes," Cornelia replied dismally.

Lelouch remained silent watching the crowd.

At that moment a Britannian officer stepped up onto the gallow and unrolled a scroll.

"Dante Sparda!" He proclaimed. "You have been charged, trailed, and convicted for numerous offenses against both his majesty and the people of Britannia. Such crimes include but are not solely focused on the following."

Dante rolled his eyes in annoyance.

Grif and Simmons stood by the entrance to the fort with brand new uniforms and looking like they'd gone to a spa during the last few days. Grif glanced up at the parapet above him to see an orange furred weasel like creature. He frowned at it as it took a quick look around before flitting away.

"Hey you see that?" Grif asked Simmons who promptly shushed him.

"Piracy, looting, theft, conterfitting, kidnapping, arsen, possesion of illegal weapony, impersonating a cleric of the church of Britannia, impersonating a catholic preist..."

Dante chuckled. "Oh yeah that was fun."

"Insulting royalty, assaulting royalty, resisting arrest, and possible usage of satanic forces." The officer finished.

At that moment Suzaku walked up to the royals and Gino. He was dressed in along blue jacket and a hat with a wide brim. Over his shoulder was slung a black guitar case and at his side a pair of katanna's. He gave them each a nod of respect before his eyes fell on Euphie.

"I love you," he said pushing his way into the crowd. Euphie then realized what he intended and gave a quick glance at Lelouch who smirked.

"I think I feel a little light headed," Euphie said before she feined passing out.

"Princess Euphemia," Gino said in alarm as they all bent down to check on her, completely ignoring Suzaku pushing his way through the crowd.

"However enlight of your recent assistance ineliminating the crew of the Black Angel your orginal sentence to be burned at the stake has been reduced to hanging." The Officer added to Dante before rolling up the scroll. "My god have mercy on your soul."

The executioner wrapped his hands around the level that would send Dante to his death.

Dante sighed.

"Well, it was fun while it lasted," he muttered closing his eyes.

Suzaku drew the longer of the two katannas...

The Executioner pulled the lever and Dante dropped!

Two feet as Suzaku threw the longer Katanna into a beam and Dante landed pretty short of his drop! Then Suzaku whiped out a pair of a smoke bombs and threw them into the corwd who screamed in fright and scattered in panick! The executioner leapt down as Suzaku an axe in hand as the guards above raised their rifles to shoot him only for Ranger to sweep their legs. One of the falling rifles went off when it hit the ground tearing Dante's noose enough for him to break free.

Suzaku ducked the executioners first attack and then knocked the from his hand before bashing him in the face with the pommel of his short blade. He then threw up the guitar case to Dante who pulled himself up and grabbed it. He unzipped it to reveal Rebellion, Ebony & Ivory, Ranger's sword, and Ranger's guns Sol & Luna. The two grabbed their weapons and leapt down to join Suzaku as Kallen and C.C jumped down after them.

"Come on!" Suzaku shouted and they made a break for it.

Euphemia sat up to watch while Gino suddenly realized what was going on!

"Seal the gates!" Gino shouted!

Unbeknownst to him the escapees and Suzaku weren't heading to the gates but were running for the parapets. A squad of soldier's moved to stop them but Suzaku threw Dante a length of rope. The two split apart and the soldier's ran right between them and were tripped up by the rope. Ranger, Kallen, and C.C were none to careful with who they stepped on.

But when they reached the parapet over looking the bay the game was up. Gino had rounded up a good sized squad and they were surrounded at the edge of the parapet. Lelouch, Cornelia, Euphemia, Jeremaih, and Guliford had all followed Gino up onto the parapet. Ranger pulled out his pistols and kept switching targets but Dante did not draw Ebony & Ivory. Suzaku kept his sword raised warding of the soldiers.

"Okay now you're really pushing it Suzaku!" Gino snapped.

"Hey I'm just doing as the script says," Suzaku shot back.

"Yeah well I'm frigging sick of being made second bannana throught this fic! I was about to execute a main character and his useless side kick whos here for comic releif!" Gino snapped.

Ranger's eyes flashed violently.

"What did you just," He thundered.

"Umm... Gino," Lelouch said glancing up at the sky which suddenly grew stormy.

"Accept it kid! You've been as helpfull as Sakura!" Gino goaded.

"Sakura was not useless, Forest of death? That was kinda badass." Ranger said seeming to grow a bit larger.

"Oh yeah, cutting her hair! Really helpfull," Gino shot back rolling his eyes. "I've seen golf balls that fight better."

"GINO WEINBERG!!!" Ranger thundered suddenly rising up above Gino towering over the blonde knight. Thunder crackled in the sky. "You have tempted the wrath of the author! NOW SUFFER!!!"

Ranger raised his hands and lightning blasted Gino. Gino screamed like a little girl as he was flash fried before Ranger relented. When all was done Gino was standing there covered in soot.

"Ow," Gino moaned.

"Can we get back to what's actually supposed to happen?" C.C asked.

Ranger shruged. "Be my guest," he replied.

"Okay Suzaku, I can get your upset about not getting anything much out of this crazy experince, but freeing convicted criminals? Hell I'd expect it of Lelouch but you?" Gino said standing up.

"Yeah well you forget the ending half of R2," Suzaku shot back.

"Oh you mean with all that crap that the fans hated," Gino replied rolling his eyes. "They're pirates!"

"And good people, and my place I guess is between you and them," Suzaku shot back.

Suddenly Euphie stepped forward.

"And me between you and Suzaku," she snapped.

"Yeah, thats why fangirls hated you," Ranger noted.

"Look you already agreed to marry me..." Gino started but Cornelia stepped forward.

"Wait, Euphie..." Cornelia said speaking slowly as in trying to clarify something. "You'd ditch Gino for Suzaku at the drop of a hat?"

"Ummm... Yes?" Euphie replied.

"Okay, I'm good with that," Cornelia said shrugging. Gino fell over anime style in annoyance.

"So does that mean we can leave so I can finish up my other fics?" Ranger asked.

"By all means," Cornelia replied with another shrug.

"Great," Dante said. Then he gave a nod to Suzaku. "Been fun kid."

Then he climbed up onto the parapet hanging onto a flag pole as Ranger climbed up after him.

"Ladies and Gentlemen!" Dante proclaimed. "You will always remember this as the day you almost hung, Dante Sparda! JACK POT!!"

The Dante back flipped off the parapet and Ranger jumped off.

"Do we have to go too?" C.C asked.

As if in answer Lelouch's fangirls swarmed forwarrd weapons drawn.

"Yeah time to leave," Kallen muttered before she and C.C climbed up onto the parapet. They threw Lelouch one last look.

"See you in the sequel!" Kallen called before they jumped off.

Gino and his men swarmed to the parapet to watch them all drop. Gino smirked evilly.

"Hey Kewel did you have the modifications to the cliff done?" He asked.

"Yes sir!" Kewel replied. "And this is my first apperance in two chapters sir!"

"What speacil modifciations?" Lelouch asked.

"Oh we just increased the drop distance, threw in a couple demons and put in some more sharp rocks at the bottom." Gino replied.

"Excuse me," Nunally said.

"Yes?" Gino asked.

"Hey isn't this Nunally's first time speaking in a few chapters?" Suzaku noted.

"Yeah it is," Nunnally muttered crossly. "Did Dante have his awakening?"

"His what?" Gino asked.

"Did he get impailed on his own sword?" Nunally asked.

"Yeah why?" Euphemia asked.

"Well then let me put it this way. Gino's about to be emasculated." Nunally finished.

"Where the heck did you learn that word?" Lelouch asked.

"Youtube," Nunally replied.

Suddenly strange music began floating into their ears slowly gathering in awesome.

"What the hell is going on?" Gino asked.

_'Steal a soul for a second chance,_

_But you'll never become a man.'_

"Whats that?" Jeremaih asked.

_'My chosen torture makes me stronger,_

_In a life that craves the hunger._

_A freedom and a quest for life,_

_Until the end, the judgement night._

Then the music picked up in tempo with two power chords.

"Badassery," Nunnally replied.

Below Dante spotted the demons moving up to attack them and smirked. Then he slammed his boot into the cliff side and a huge chuck broke off which Ranger, C.C, and Kallen landed on. Dante grinned and pulled out Ebony and began firing as the Demons moved into attack!

_'Bless me with your gift of light!_

_Rightcheous cause on judgenent night._

_Feel the sorrow thelight has swallowed,_

_Feel the freedom like no tommorrow!'_

Dante's gun fire blasted down demons with ease as he did incredible feets of gunslinging which caused all above to have anime jaw drops.

_'Kill before a time to kill them all!_

_Pass down the rightcheous law!'_

Several demons swarmed Dante! Then in a massive series of slashes and gun shots Dante broke free of the demons their corpses faliing behind him.

_'Serving justice that dwells in me! _

_Lifeless corpses as far as the eye can see!'_

Dante hurled rebellion and it impailed dozens of demons. Then Dante shot it's pommel and it shot down fire flowing down the blade with speed.

_'The eye can see! _

_The eye can see!_

_The eye can see!_

_The eye can see!_

_The eye can see!_

_The eye can see.'_

Dante then some how ran right along the side of the cliff and grabbed Rebellion before jumping away from the cliff side narrowly avoiding the rocks at the bottom. Seconds later the rock Ranger, Kallen, and C.C were on crashed into the rocks and left them unharmed. Gino stared down in shock and disbelief.

"Ya I'd call that emasculating for Gino," Lelouch noted.

"Well at least they can't get far!" Kewel said desperatly.

"Sir look!" Another soldier suddenly shouted.

There on the horizon was approaching the _Black Angel_. They could all see Dante, Ranger, Kallen and C.C now swimming towards the ship and Gino glared at it.

"Shall we get the _Pegasus_ ready to go sir?" Kewel asked.

Gino then sighed defeated.

"Nah its almost happy hour so lets go," Gino said leaving.

Cornelia glanced at Euphie and Suzaku.

"SO should we leave you to alone?" Cornelia asked.

"Umm... yeah," Suzaku muttered.

"Right you to get this thing wrapped up okay?" Lelouch said leaving with Nunnally and Jeremaih. Cornelia quickly followed with Guliford.

Euphemia turned to Suzaku and smiled.

"So is the part where we kiss?" She asked.

"Yeah," Suzaku said before pulling her close and they kissed.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

A few minutes later Dante was pulled aboard the _Black Angel_ by Lady and Johnson. On deck were Chef, Stewie, Jak, Daxter, Juduea, and Allen.

"Where's everyone else?" Dante asked.

"Oh the bastards jumped ship after they found out about the whole mess in the sequel." Johnson replied with a shrug as Ranger, Kallen, and C.C were pulled on board.

"Where's Kaguya?" Lady asked.

"Dead," Ranger deadpanned.

"Oh, well that sucks." Juduea observed.

"Well she was rather ineffectual," Kallen muttered.

"So ship mine?" Dante asked.

"Yeah," Johnson said pointing to the wheel.

Dante slowly made his way up to the rear deck and climbed up to the wheel. He slowly ran his fingers along the blackened wood with longing before looking up.

"Alright you lot! Shove out! We got a crazy party comin' soon!" Dante barked and everyone rushed to stations. Dante grinned and then pulled out his compass and flicked it open.

"Yo ho, yo ho," He muttered unde rhis breath. Then he smirked.

"And really bad eggs." He said before snapping the compass shut.

**POTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTCPOTC**

Later that night back at Kamine Island Courage flopped up on shore and picked up a shikkon jewel instantly turning skeletal. Then he turned to the camera.

"I don't about you folks but this has to be animal cruelty," he said.

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**THE END!!!**

**Ranger24: Okay and thats the story. Thank god its over and the writers blocks dead for now. Any ways keep an eye out for the sequel, Dead Devil's Chest. Read and review! **


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